Progress!!!! Then nothing Give up??

[Jen8720]

Hey everyone,
I am finally thinking of giving up all hope of getting back with my ex. I just need some confirmation that I am not being irrational or being impatient….

I split up with my ex beginning of February. We argued over something very trivial. He got mad and ended it. We were together 6 months-whirlwind kinda thing both absolutely smitten with each other!
I did no contact for 3 weeks then dropped him a light hearted text. He responded positively. I left it another week or so and then text asking if he fancied a coffee sometime. He said yes. He then had to cancel the coffee date due to work issues (his job means he has to travel at a minutes notice) so this didn’t worry me too much. He was very apologetic and asked if we could meet later in th week and was that good for me. He said he was really looking forward to it and had lots of sad faces in the texts. He said he would be in touch once he’s back home to arrange a date but it’s been 4 days now. He said he should only be away for a couple days.
Should I just give up???

[Phonis]

i think ur being pretty irrational here.my ex also split up with me at the beginning of february. Look even if he’s not texting u for some reason, doesn’t mean he’s over it. He could be confused and not sure what to make of his emotions. These things take a LONG time sometimes. If u want to move on go for it. But you have to understand that things take a lot longer then this sometimes. And you have to have patience!

[Oshi]

I know how you feel, it’s so hard waiting around like that when he’s not responding, but I think you should wait a few more days, If he’s willing to meet that’s a good sign so I say wait a bit more for him to respond.

[california1815]

Keep your cool. Four days is nothing. If in two days or so you haven’t heard back, just send a friendly text asking him if he still wants to grab that coffee. No harm in making the first contact.

[Jen8720]

Thanks phonis for telling me straight. I thought I might be being a little irrational but I think it all stems from how he broke up with me. He didn’t acrually say its over he just ignored me until I had to get the hint. I just left him to it as I thought he’s probably mad after the little argument we had. So I guess half of me is thinking are we here again….I wouldn’t normally worry about this kinda thing it’s just because of the way he handled the break up makes me a little nervous I guess.

[Jen8720]

Thanks phonis for telling me straight. I thought I might be being a little irrational but I think it all stems from how he broke up with me. He didn’t acrually say its over he just ignored me until I had to get the hint. I just left him to it as I thought he’s probably mad after the little argument we had. So I guess half of me is thinking are we here again….I wouldn’t normally worry about this kinda thing it’s just because of the way he handled the break up makes me a little nervous I guess.

I sent him a text last night and haven’t heard anything…..I think it’s time to give up everyone.

[tami420]

Hi Jen, I think you should wait a bit more to see if he will text you and ask you out for coffee,unless if u are ready to let him go completly and move on. Let go when you wont want to be back with him-that is when u really will be fine if he wont be in your life anymore. Also its not even 2 months since break up which is not that long (tho it seems like it) there still can be hope,you never know =).. but ofc you need to be happy without him first and when u come to that point, you will see that you will want him back, but not need him back. Also if you really love him letting go would only hurt you. and you will still find urself looking at ur phone for his text, probably. Idk, it’ been twod ays since u posted here, is there any news by now did he respond or smthn?

with me and my ex it will soon be 4 months since he broke up. i still cant give up on him.. I learned to be without him..i want him even more now since we r friends and all lol. I have him, but I dont have him… tho this week i saw that he sees my improvements, he also texts me first,he calls me to go out or to do smthn together, while 10 day ago he still called our friends first… and we dont hang out with our friends that much anymore, but we are alone more or less and enoy being together,both of us. Its like when we were together.. we even cuddle in bed and he slept over this weekend with me and he played with my hair, and was really sweet and i was scratching his back and such…and he told me this:”aw tamara you are a golden girl, there arent many like you” and he said it three times in 15minutes. we went to the movies with my sis and her bf yesterday 🙂 We are friends with benefits, but he still comes to me just to hang out and talk for few hours, drink coffee, and we dont always get to do it..just a bit hanging out and spending time together. Its like our old bond is getting back as it was, just more positive and strong and slower but steadier. I hope he will soon ask me to give us another try really. also when he goes home he always says; it was nice tamara, really nice.. thank you for everything *and he pinches my cheek* =)

[Jen8720]

Hey Tami420,
Thanks for your advice but I told him I didnt think it was a good idea to meet for coffee. Since splitting up he’s treated me so badly ignoring me, leaving me to pay a £164 trip we had booked together, he didn’t even have the guts to end the relationship he just ignored me until I got the hint. Why am I fighting for this man? Yes it was the best relationship I have ever had but enough is enough. I realised I am still angry and holding on to negative thoughts surrounding the argument so I just don’t think its the right time to meet or to reconcile. I know when people hurt they shut down and do things to cope but the argument was so small it makes me think that there’s more to this than I know. If he’s not willing to talk about it then I can’t do much to improve the relationship. Trying to get him back hurts and it’s not helping me at all in any way.

I’m soo pleased you are making progress though!!! Well done you. Although just make sure he isn’t using you for one thing! Don’t just give it to him on a plate-he is getting the best of both worlds. Being single yet having sex on tap from you. I don’t mean to be cynical or anything but just be careful!!xx

[Farrierphill]

Tami420 I would be carefull as he gets the best of everything he can be single and you can’t say anything about what he does but he also missis you and does enjoy your company but if you give him the extra benefits he can come around cuddle and have the passion he is missing from his life and that empty hole he had you are filling but he isn’t tied down if I was you I wouldn’t even be cuddling until you get him back.

[Author]

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