Boards Reconciliation Has my ex lost all feelings?

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  • #56786
    Beckyx12015
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    • Total Posts: 2

    Got back together with my ex after a horrible argument (and after him ignoring me for weeks) we eventually got back together and things were perfect for the first month, he told me he loved me and couldn’t wait to bring me to Disneyland when he gets full time in his job. Then all of a sudden after a few weeks he got really distant and cold an started to ignore me. When I called him out in it he asked could we meet up and talk so I expected him to break up with me, he told me he.

    Just felt weird about everything and felt that we were moving too fast he said he loved me and still wanted to be with me and he was sorry for ignoring and being off the last few days. Fast forward two weeks and he broke up with me (I nearly had to pull the words out of his mouth) he couldn’t even look at me. I got pissed off and of course we ended in a stupid argument because I told him I was asked out on a date (tried to make him jealous) he told me that I ruined my chances of getting back together now over that(why would he say that minutes after he dumped me??) it’s been 3 months and we’ve had minimal contact the first 3 times I text him he replied I contact him a few days ago askinf about giving his stuff back to him (after not speaking to him for 4 weeks to try to make him miss me) and he didn’t reply.

    What should I do? ๐Ÿ™ I love him and miss him and loosing hope at this stage. One of his friends came up to me at a party one night and said he hadn’t been the same lately and that I deserved better and that he will snap out of it and regret it, but He hasn’t and I’m scared he never will ๐Ÿ™ (people think he has changed since his dad died last year) I think that too because our arguing started around then because he would always rather go out drinking every weekend than see me most of the time. It hurt. I tried NC but hasn’t seemed to work (right after we broke up I went 6weeks NC. Then I text him maybe one a week for three weeks – he replied all those times but seemed distant still so I went another 4 weeks NC it’s been 5 days and he still didn’t reply (turns out he was out drinking -shocker….) (I asked could I give him back his stuff) any advice?

    #56820
    HurtingLikeYou
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 14

    Hi there.

    I hear you and feel your pain that’s why I am HurtingLikeYou. ๐Ÿ™‚ Anyway, let me just say that no matter what happens, things will be ok. Read old posts here. Most of them ends up well in one form or another

    So here’s what you need to do. First, you need to send all of his stuff back to him. By doing this, you are forcing him to see and acknowledge his reality. The reality that he might actually lose you. Anything that you can’t return that reminds you of him you either sell them, throw them away or give to charity. Put all pictures and mementos in a box, seal it and hide it. Then do no contact for 30 days.

    No contact is not only not reaching out or replying back. It’s mostly about making yourself better, improving yourself and getting out from being addicted to him. So this is the hard part really. Go to a gym, work on that promotion, go out with friends, go out on a date but know your limitations. (the objective is getting him back not replacing him with a rebound) before you know it, you’ll feel better, less affected by him and have a crystal clear and unbiased way of thinking. That’s the time you would do the re attraction if you still want him back by then.

    I wish all goes well.

    #56858
    chiaseeds
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 2

    Hi there!

    I’ve been going through the same thing. Me and my ex have broken up again after getting back together because he felt things were weird. One moment he was in bliss, the next moment he seemed confused.

    I can’t help but feel like it is unfinished business and I’m sure you feel the same too. One thing that has helped me is to become detached from the situation. Read up on the Law of attraction and things will really make sense to you. Whatever we think is what we attract. So work on yourself and think good thoughts, think positive thoughts about yourself and only then can your ex or someone new want to be with you again!

    Hope all goes well xx

    #56880
    redvelvet
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 18

    @ Chiaseeds-Being detached is good but thinking positive thoughts isn’t going to return an ex. That will only cause you to have false hope and then it’s devastating if you don’t get him back, making the situation worse for you.

    #57279
    Beckyx12015
    Participant
    • Total Posts: 2

    So sorry to hear that! Have you been in contact with him?

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