Ex is with someone that doesnt want sex?

[LAbound]

So a friend brought it to my attention yesterday that my ex is feeling insecure and already threw an attitude at her new person. She said she was just in a mood but also stated she isnt happy with her body and that couldve contributed. Another thing I guess that happened to cause insecurity is that her new person said he Is indifferent about sex and he doesnt have a sex drive right now.

My ex I guess told my friend things just feel off between them.
Back story. My ex’s new guy (which most believe is just another rebound) ditched someone he was dating (during the third date) to approach my ex. I told my ex that is a character flaw and to be careful. She doesnt believe this guy would do the same to her. Well, they were together for almost a month and hadnt had sex. But my ex said once they become official, shed have sex. I bit my tongue. I then told her that a person who will up and ditch someone he was on a third date with purely because you looked good….this guy could be about the conquest.

Now theyve been together a little over a month and already this person is avoiding sex.
Maybe I am wrong but wouldn’t a guy thats 25 who is remotely sexually attractive be wanting to have sex? Especially in such a new relationship?

I mean.. I am hurting for my ex. She’s so insecure and I dont want her rebound hurting her.

[LAbound]

Remotely sexually attracted**

[mike2014]

Maybe the guy likes other guys. per Seinfeld, “not their is anything wrong with that.”

[LAbound]

No. It’s not that. I feel like ibwas kind of right about my ex being a conquest. They had sex and now he is dropping statements like he doesnt have a sex drive. And is indifferent about sex. This is something I kniw that will not fly long term with my ex.

[LAbound]

Sorry for typos. But yeah..

I just wanted to know what others make of it. I mean.. a month long relationship and there is hardly any sex? I remember our honeymoon stage…it was full of down n dirty s*x. Lol

[mike2014]

Sorry, was kind of making a joke. Bad attempt sorry. What you said is correct. For most guys the conquest and chase of getting the girl is all the thrill and once they get them everything changes. This might work well for you in the end maybe

[mike2014]

I remember when I first met my ex a long time ago it took me pretty long before we were pysical. We were both 20 tho and she was a girl who wanted to take it slow and make sure I was going to be more than just a quick hook up. That actually made me respect her and like her more. We were very affectionate tho without the sex early on tho.

Now tho being almost 30 when I meet a girl I am definitely much more trying to be pysical quicker lol

[LAbound]

I just hope this doesnt hurt my ex. I didnt see this lasting. They dont even match as a couple but if thats what it really was… I will be pissed. Idc if it suits my future wants.. I just want my best friend and former love to be ok.

[atea1234]

@labound it doesn’t really sound like this is a relationship you need to worry about which is the good thing!! That does sound very odd. It’s not your job to feel sad or worry about her anymore, but she is very lucky you still feel that way. Just take this as a positive that probably this relationship won’t last and might be helpful in bringing her back closer to you 🙂 have you had any contact at all?

[LAbound]

No. I think it will be closer to six months before I talk to her. It hasnt been that long since I told her im moving on.

But thats what a few ppl think…it’s odd. Theyve had sex. So its not taking it slow in that sense. Idk.

[atea1234]

Even if you wait 6 months to talk to her, it is still helpful for you if her other relationship doesn’t last or is lacking something. Try not to analyze her other relationship too much – it is impossible to really know what’s going on there but it should be a source of comfort to know her new relationship is lacking in an area your relationship wasn’t. It will definitely make her think about what she had with you and compare. In this case, that is probably a good thing

[LAbound]

Yeah. Buy if she attempts to talk to me, what should I do?

I mean..id ask myself if it’s because shes lonely or realizes I was right about this guy…compared me to him and decided to see what’s been up with me. ?

[atea1234]

I think it depends what she says. Do not be there to comfort her if she comes to you about any relationship problems or because she’s sad it didn’t work out with her new guy. If she comes to you to be friendly to catch up then do that and discuss other things. Make it clear you won’t discuss her relationship with her. If you do want her back though tell her you’re happy to hear from her and asking about her job, family, friends, etc. stay confident and discuss only neutral topics

[Belle]

For a guy not to want sex either he’s a religious soul or just not right. I’ve never met a guy whose not wanted sex ASAP. It’s always me that holds that kind of thing back until I feel the time is right.

Sounds like you’ve nothing to worry about with this bloke.

[LAbound]

Thanks for your advice. @area.

@belle

It was definitely a surprise. I mean the excuse wasnt..’I want to take it slow’ ‘we are moving too fast’ or anything like that. It was ‘im indifferent about sex.’ ‘ I dont have much of a sex drive’…. that doesnt make sense if its a brand new relationship. And theyve had sex from what ive heard so it’s not about waiting.

I cant believe I still care for her this deeply.

[Author]

Posts