No no no … don’t ask her out until she contacts you again.
@solidturd lol and what if she doesn’t !
If she doesn’t, she doesn’t … you just move on till she reaches out again.
Sorry to jump in guys think j may need the more direct approach of solid on this one lol.
At what point do we all think,rather than listening and reading websites. Do you we just follow our gut. Some people are hair to stubborn to reach out. I fear this is happening with me ok it’s only been almost two weeks of nc again. Also to almost three months since the break up. I am just sick of do this do that make her want this. When gut says just get some answers and move on or sort shit out.
@Gingerone It’s clear that she misses you, however I don’t think you should act too quickly. As you said she might miss you but it doesn’t mean the she wants to get back together. If you don’t feel like waiting then ask her directly but be ready for rejection. Things like this take time. Maybe she figured out her feelings but she’s not ready for a relationship again. I don’t think you should risk this by rushing things. I think you should wait for her to initiate the meeting. And in the meantime enjoy your vacation and have a good time.
Ye your right @oshi.
There’s a girl back home, that’s been checking me out everytime I go home but I was in a relationship, I would have never even thought of cheating. But last time I went home we had a brief chat then she added me on facebook and started following me on Instagram. So that might force her hand a bit, knowing I might move on. Who knows!
My gut feeling was right! She is seeing some one! I just drove past her walking to the pub with some fella! I was going to beep the horn but my heart sank. I’m devestated 
@oshi
Walking the pub doing what holding hands what, could just be a friend.
@jburg32 no not holding hands or nothing but he looked straight at me. I’m sure he went to put his arm around her then. I’m feeling sick
Jburg you make an interesting point earlier on this page. At what point do we trust our gut?
Well I wish I had trusted mine before my ex broke up with me, because I knew there was something up and I wish I had called her out on it. I wish I had trusted it when she sent me the text, because for all of her needing space and time spiel my gut said it was a break up text and it took a friend who read it to say that to me.
Honestly, we should all trust our guts because in my case it’s hardly ever wrong. However, the only way ex’s can reconcile (and that is why we are all on this site) is if you forget about the previous relationship and move on.
This past week I’ve been considering texting my ex, it’s two months post break up and I’d like to speak to her about things. However, a friend asked me these questions… “If she said she wanted to get back would you?” My reply was I don’t know, when a month ago it was yes. Then he asked “If you said yes, could you trust her like before?” My answer was no.
From my experience and that of others, you need to fully let go of what’s happened and of the past relationship. Everyone on here and their ex’s are single - well let’s look at new opportunities. If the ex wants you back in the near future or somewhere down the road then that may be an opportunity worth taking.
Yep.
Gut tells me she has moved on and I have forced myself in limbo due to her head games.
I was going to do a post today and really suggest counselling.as with all things it gets harder Before it gets better.
However I really suggest a mindfulness programme. This weekend I am doing 16 hours of it, desperate times call for desperate measures.
However after day one I have realised we are all perfectly imperfect and life is full of shit. If our partners can’t deal with that and deal with out messiness. Then sorry but they aren’t worth us at all.
I agree with nc and straight sfter a break space is what works and should happen. However further down the line go with your gut.
Gingertone,
You have no clear evidence, continue down your path. She is single maybe just exploring things. Is he a friend does he know you?
Why would he look at you then try something?
@Gingerone First try to calm down. You don’t know anything yet. The way I see it there are two options. The first one is that he’s just a friend and nothing more, and they are just hanging out together. Or could be that she misses you but still confused and that’s why she is trying to move on. It’s clear that she still has feelings for you. If not she wouldn’t have told you all the things she’s said. That she dreams about you, wants to meet up with you, and seemed worried and jealous like she did. You shouldn’t make assumptions because you don’t know anything for sure.
Or @oshi disagree if you like.
She is all over the place, doing what she can do to stop you moving on, keeping you in limbo.
Seeing if she came move on first!
I thought my gut was right, then I changed my mind after everything she sent me via txt. Then I thought my gut was saying I had a chance, for some stupid reason I still think I might. But at what point do u say, your kidding yourself and hearing what u want to hear. Or are u hearing rings because your right!?
I’m so confused right now!
This was my point the other day, at what point is enough enough and we listen to our gut.
Stop all the silly games of nc this and that.
Maybe text
Say think I saw you heading out last night.
Hope you had a good evening. If your at the point where you could send that.
I don’t know what to think any more! I thought there was hope last week. Now I’m not too sure. I thought my gut was saying there was hope, but after last night mmmm but what if ive got the wrong end of the stick. And it wasn’t what I thought…but then again what if it was.
How do I go about this now, do I txt or leave it. I don’t want to look crazy either.
I was going to txt early next week to see how she got on in a festival this weekend and see if she would like to join me at a local park next week to watch some blues music. I’m so confused right now! I want to know if it was what I thought or just innocent.
I regret not honking the horn so she seen me, her look would have told me everything I wanted to know. Ahhhh
Don’t text her about seeing her last night! Why? It comes over a little needy and jealous IF (and it’s a big if) she was on a date. Even if she was, it doesn’t mean much - my friends are trying to set me up with a girl, I’m tempted to go just to see how it feels and to get out there again but it still doesn’t mean I don’t want another crack down the road with my ex.
Your gut said there was hope last week, well trust it. She clearly still has feelings for you since she said what she said. It sounds like she’s confused and girls usually take a bit of time to figure out what they truly want.
If I were you I’d drop the message about the festival and see what the reaction is and if she responds warmly to a conversation. Maybe drop in that you’re going to watch some blues music at the local park and if she responds to that well then maybe say come along. Play it cool and take your time!
Shit! I wish I would have seen this sooner @ty10
I’ve txt her now. Shit!
What have I done
The txt read - Have a good time @ Africa oye. I seen you last night on the way back from training I was going to beep but I didn’t want to make it awkward lol x
Now I’ve gone an ballsed it all up
IMO you shouldn’t have done it but you didn’t mention seeing her with a guy… so all isn’t lost.
Now it depends if she replies and what that reply is!