The advice in your last message was great. For the most part I have followed it. Although, sadly I didn’t follow it to a tee :(. She ended up commenting on a Facebook post of mine on a friend’s wall. I kept my response short. I thought, since she was warming up to me again, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to small talk and call her.
She was in a meeting and called me back a bit later. She mentioned just seeing the texts I sent her in the beginning of July “demanding” my money back that I lent her. I just said, that was a long time ago and things are different now. She said ok.
We talked for like five minutes. I hinted about doing something over the weekend (we didn’t make plans). Anyway, she sounded kind of sad because her roommate’s brother hung himself. I said some comforting things to her. I could tell she wasn’t in the best mood. She told me how she was kind of struggling with money but never asked me to borrow any. I offered to lend her some but she was like no I can’t ask you for help. After our conversation, she messaged me and said “sorry if she was snappy, that wasn’t my intention. I’m just struggling.” I figured this was a great opportunity to show her some change in me.
During our phone conversation when she said she was struggling I had already decided that I would help her out. I had her account number in my phone and I transferred her $200 and then messaged her telling her to check her account and made a joke about not spending it on shopping. She said she couldn’t accept it she already owes me money. I just said, “take care of yourself” things work out how they are meant to. We text a little bit more but essentially she thanked me a bunch and then text me again the next day thanking me and saying it helped her out a ton and went to her health insurance. I kept my response short and said” You are welcome. I am glad I could help. I tried to keep all my responses about the money short.
Which brings me up today, during our previous conversation, I said that I didn’t realize that football game was on a Thursday and there was a baseball game each night Friday through Thursday. We never made official plans to go since it was the beginning of the week. So today, I called her because we are still on good terms, and she messaged me saying she was in a meeting and asked what’s up and to just message her.
So I asked her about going to the baseball game on Friday because it was the last night with fireworks. She said “I can’t I’ll be helping with a service project :)” Then I said “there was more. Just call me when you can.” “Service Projects are awesome”.
I left it at that. I didn’t want to drag things out in messaging and my mind went blank. I should have just gone with” I understand maybe another time.” My mind just went blank and my emotions kicked in but I didn’t drag out the conversation anymore.
I’m not sure if she will call back or not. If she does, I am not really too sure of what to say. If she doesn’t then I will defiantly just leave it at that because all of this is stressful and I don’t get why she keeps me close but not too close? I haven’t been diligent on staying off her Facebook page. I really need to work on this. I just start to assume things and see guys commenting on her stuff and I get anxious. I need to delete the app again because that worked for me. I don’t know how to feel about sending her the $200. I wanted to show her I changed and would hold her owing me money over her head. It just seems like talking in messages really doesn’t go anywhere even though all of the times we recently hung out were arranged this way.
Back to no contact right? It just seems hard to distance myself when she is starting to warm up but at the same time she keeps her distance. I feel like if I don’t make the first move. I’ll never see her. Yet I was wrong on that before. In person things go great and we are touchy feely. So it makes no sense.
