Wrote a needy pathetic letter to a ex that didn’t want any contact with me whatsoever. I regret it so much… I gave it to her yesterday night at her door, she didn’t seem happy at all, and I don’t want to seem pathetic and needy anymore. Should I tell her that it’s over and that I’m moving on? The letter was 8 pages long containing 2380 words about what we had, and that I’m willing to do anything for her and allowing her to do anything if she decides to get back with me… She hasn’t removed her relationship with me on facebook or anything like that, but I’m 100% sure it’s over and that she’s playing me.
I’m pretty sure she read it yesterday and told all of her friends about the letter too…
I thought about writing this on facebook to her so that I don’t seem so pathetic after that stupid letter.:
“I’m pretty sure you have read the letter. In the letter I’ve written that you can use as much time as you want alone. But I’m pretty sure that your mind has already been settled on an answer. I think it’s best if we just are friends. I’ll miss the memories we’ve had together, but I have a lot of positive things going on in my life right now and I don’t want to destroy any of it. I’m going to move on from what we had, and I hope that you can respect that. Wish you the best!”
Should I go for it? Or give her some time then do it?
I wrote a lot of stupid shit… Honestly… A LOT. It made me seem so needy and pathetic… I wrote her that I’m going to therapy and really trying to change my self… And it’s over. She’s just being a bitch and playing with my emotions, I need to show her that I’m alpha, I need to switch situations so that SHE’S the one leaving something great here, and not me…
We was together for 2 years. Broke up after summer vacation. I didn’t treat her well, so this letter kind of gave me a closure, even though it made me seem so needy and pathetic… I think she lost all interest in me and honestly I’m not sure what to do anymore… All the begging + that letter of 8 pages pushed her away for good. All my friends tells me different things. SHOULD I JUST TAKE NC?
Or should I write her that I’m done with her and that I’m moving on EVEN though I gave her the letter yesterday which basically told her I’d go through hell to get her back… I lost my pride and got humiliated
Should i
a) Tell her that I’m moving on and I hope she can do the same and keep being friends.
b) Tell her that I’m moving on and wish her the best with her life.
c) Start NC and don’t talk with her at all.
8 pages…yes, sounds like you were needy. That’s expected from a girl, but not a guy. I doubt she’d be feeling very attracted to you right now.
I wouldn’t say anything great is going on in your life. She’ll see through it. I would say something along the lines of you’re obviously still hurting and good luck for the future. Then NC for as long as it takes you to be strong again.
Somebody, should I write anything to her on facebook though? Like show her that I’m ready to move on if she is? Even though that letter contributed to the fact that I wasn’t ready to move on at all…
Last time she texted me was when she said " Don’t you know it’s over? Not one day can you go without being with other girls. And I don’t need that. " that was like 4 days ago…
She has trust issues… She doesn’t trust me at all… And now she hates me… And I’m also clingy, which makes everything 100 x times worse. I’m so unsure of what to do next… It seems to be both a good idea to do NC and a bad idea at the same time. Because now she’s in control and she can do whatever she wants while I’m just waiting for her…
You know the situation the best, but the letter speaks volumes. I wouldn’t even say you’re moving on. She’ll see through that. I’d just admit that you’re still hurting and wish her well for the future. At least then you don’t leave that letter as the last impression.
What do you think would be a good idea to write to her on facebook? This will be the last contact I’ll have with her again until she contacts me… I want her to start missing me and chasing me. I’ve shown her that I love her and everything, but I need to make her realize that I have some ground rules to and that she can’t do this to me even though that I cheated on her and was a complete bastard…
OK, I just realised you were the guy who cheated. In that case I wouldn’t say anything more to her. She won’t care if you’re hurting. She wants you to hurt! Just leave it at that. If you cheated, then the letter isn’t as pathetic, as it sounds like it’s more of an apology. I would probably still just say to contact you if/when she is ready.
Oh… God that made me a bit more happier honestly… At the end of the letter I wrote her:
"I know that you’re frustrated and that everything is really difficult for you now. Take all the time you need, and if you ever feel like contacting me again, then you should know that I’m always here for you.
I love you “her name”, and I hope that you can forgive me and give me a new chance…
I only wish you the best my princess,
Miss you…
<3<3"
In the letter I wrote her a lot of good memories that we shared together, and I reminded her of them etc. I didn’t put all the blame on myself completely, but 79% of it. Told her that every relationship has it problems and our relationship is strong, and I’m sure that we could figure something out and start again on a blank new page.
Sounds good…I would need to see something like that from my cheating ex if I was going to consider taking her back, not the random call or text that she does.
I got drunk for the 3rd in my life and I cheated on her, I called her RIGHT after I had woken up, and I had told her I had sex with another girl, even though I didn’t… All of my friends that were there says that I only kissed her and nothing more. But I was so insecure so I thought I had really had sex with another girl…I had passed out on the floor, btw… I can link you to the story if you want too?
And after all that she still took me back though… But I was going through so many problems that I destroyed both her and me during those 3 months we were together again. And I know that she hates me, I need to show her that I can be trusted and that I’m willing to give her time and respect her, even though that she wants to hurt me.
It seems like I’m fighting for a lost cause. It seems like she is talking with other boys and just waiting to make real contact with them before she breaks up with me and leaves me like a pathetic retard I am. Even after sending that letter I regret it, I seemed needy. And that isn’t good at all. This is the 2nd time she does this, last time it was last year in winter, she told me the same stuff. I don’t love you anymore, I don’t want to be with you etc and all of this was BEFORE I even cheated on her.
Can anyone please recommend me something good to write that shows her I love her, that I’m hurt. But I’m not willing to stick around her forever, and that if she doesn’t changes towards me I’ll leave her for good? I think of that letter as I gave her the chance to get 100% control… And I hate being pathetic and leaving all up to her. I want to show her that other females find me attractive and that if she doesn’t want me anymore I can get someone else. The twitter picture she favorited kinda shows that she no longer loves me…
Nvm… I’m going on full NC, even though she decides to call me or anything I won’t answer for a month. My friends are saying that I should join them on a friends birthday party, should I go? They’re going to drink and party etc. And I’m pretty sure my ex will somehow find out
Go on full NC, it’s the best you can do! But if you see her, don’t be rude to her and don’t start talking about your feelings and the break up.
Go to the birthday party - why not?! You two arent together anymore so you can do as you please, but if you’re trying to get her back, dont hook up with other girls.
I shouldn’t hook up with other girls? Should I at least somehow show her that other girls are interested or that I’m interested in others? Like for example when I go to the party, should I take a picture and lay it on mystory on snap or maybe instagram? To show her that I’m doing fine? Do you actually think that there is any chance for me to get my ex back at all?