After a lot of chaos and two and a half weeks of being broken up but trying to figure out the move, he’s finally moved out. It was fairly drama-free, other than me obviously being upset despite knowing we were making the right decision. He got all of his things out, was sweet enough to check in and see how I was doing, gave me some hugs, and even offered to drive me to work. We worked together Friday night and all day Saturday, and he was fairly cordial and nice. Nothing too extreme in one direction or another, other than he had a really bad day Saturday and appeared to be kind of butthurt that I asked him for a ride at the last minute (for clarification, this was because he told me the night before to text him if I needed one, I tried to make other plans, it fell through, and I’m pretty sure he wished he’d been asked first instead of last).
We’d talked about potentially making plans to go on a hike (and maybe see a movie, but that hasn’t come up yet) this week, so I took charge and texted him via online app on Sunday night to ask if we might push our hike back to the next afternoon instead of the morning. My phone got water damaged this weekend, so I haven’t been able to be in contact outside of using that app when I’m on my computer. He told me he’d made plans to play tennis Monday afternoon, but asked me about this morning. Long story short, our conversation went back and forth like this (he used to have the same phone I currently have)…
He sent me a text at 11:07, just a couple minutes after I went into my meeting with the case worker. I came home, checked it, and he said “How about around 9?” At 12:31, I responded, “9 works great. Just let me know where to meet you!” He immediately said, “I’ll pick you up! I had an idea about your phone. I can give you the battery out of my old one?” I was in class, so I didn’t see it right away by I responded, “That’d be really nice. Do you think that will work?” Again, instantly he says, “We can try it out!” and then “I just have to find my old phone…” He totally doesn’t realize it’s at my apartment, so I could do that anyways. I replied at like 3:30, “Do you not know where it is? I’m scared even a different battery won’t help, and I’ll have to get a new one…” Instantly, he says, “If that’s the case you can just use my old phone!” and then “I’m just not sure where it ended up in the move…” I messed up and didn’t just accept his help/politeness like my counselor said would be best, given how he takes rejection, and said, “I don’t want to take it from you! You might need it.”
After all of this, he gets here at 9:15 and apologizes for being late. He told me he woke up at 8:30, looked up his phone, and just planned to wake up for a minute and then get out of bed. Turns out, he accidentally fell back asleep, woke up, it was 9:05, he freaked out and texted my cell phone because he was panicked and forgot it’s dead, and then drove right over here. Didn’t eat breakfast or anything.
He told me first thing that he had searched everywhere and wasn’t finding the phone, and wanted to try looking in a basket that got left behind here. He found nothing, so we just decided to go and he told me he’d look more when he got home and text his mom to see if she might’ve set it anywhere. So we got in the car, drove the couple of miles to the head of the trail, and talked most of the way there.
We got to the trail and there’s a ton of different paths so he told me which one he thought we should talk, I’ve never been, so I left it up to him. We pretty much just hiked then for about an hour and a half. It was all uphill and I was definitely behind him a fair amount. He’d stop every once in awhile though to give me a break or to ask how I was doing, even though I told him he didn’t need to wait for me. He also talked some about his band and things that were going on in his life, etc. Nothing major, but enough talk that it was nice to hear stuff from him. He told me a couple of times during the REALLY steep parts that I was a champ and I was doing great. Like I said, this pretty much continued for a long time and FINALLY we made the top. There’s like a guest book thing up there and he showed me where him and Spencer had signed in like a week ago, I wrote a note saying I felt victorious and put our names, and just sat in the sun for a bit while he ate some japanese candy he really likes that I’d given him. Then we started to head down.
We took a different path down, one that went through this forested area. It was super steep at the end and then pretty flat for most of the beginning, but much longer than the trail we took. We talked a little here and there, kind of ran together down the hills, and that was really it. At one point, he had to stop to get a rock out of his shoe and when he squatted down to take his shoe off, he leaned and put his hand on my foot to steady himself, instead of the ground. Then I hit my foot at one point and he stopped to ask if I was okay. The hike down took way less time and we still didn’t talk much, but we made it back to the car.
In the car, he talked about trying to find the phone again and told me what time it was and asked me what my plans for the rest of the day were. I lied and told him my math class at 1 got cancelled because he told me he’d just planned on eating breakfast when he got back, and I thought maybe he’d invite me. He didn’t. I asked him and he said the two of them might go play tennis again and he had late night band practice. I wanted to asked if he had time to squeeze a movie in there somewhere or sometime this week, but I skipped it. I felt like I was probably already acting so dumb and desperate. We finally got back to my house and he told me he’d text me if he found the phone and kind of stalled for a minute talking about where it could be or stuff like that. Then he thanked me for the hike and told me he’d see me later. I said bye, feeling kind of defeated, and walked up to my door. I unlocked it and turned around and watched him drive off, glancing back at me.
Unbeknownst to me, my cat sprinted out the door by my feet when I was looking at him, and I missed it. But he saw it, so a minute later the car pulled back up, he knocked on the door, and had the cat in tow. I thanked him and he came in and dug through the same basket one more time for the phone, then smiled and told me he’d see me soon. Then he went to his car, sat in it for like 4 or 5 minutes and looked like he was on his phone, then drove off.
I also told him I was taking the cat to the vet tomorrow and he asked when and said I could take his car or he’d drive me if I needed. I said I might take him up on that if the person I was trying to borrow a car from couldn’t lend it to me, and mentioned not wanting to pay for a taxi. He told me a taxi would be really silly and a waste of money and he has nothing going on.
So after all of this, I’m left unsure of what to think and what to do. He’s been DYING to see the movie we talked about going and seeing. Like, has not shut up about its release for MONTHS. Yet, he still hasn’t gone. I’m wondering if he’s waiting for me to bring it up, or what’s going on. I kind of want to ask him tomorrow, while we’re dealing with the cat, if he wants to make plans but I really don’t want to seem desperate.
Any advice?!?
