Ok so she didn´t text me yesterday about the coffee invite. But again: didn´t expect it either… I just like to update this thread with my thoughs, and get some feedback, as it makes the NC way easier to me
Ok, so I am still doing my NC, and putting all focus on myself now.
I have made som changes to my looks. (New haircut, new style, tanning, teeth whitening)
I am also looking for a new job, and I am planning on selling my house (This has been a dream for some time now)
When the house gets put up for sale I am gonna post a picture of the sales sign on my facebook, put a description like: “looking forward to a very exciting future” or something… That will make her wonder… What is happening, where is he going ect…
I had one thought:
She has changed a bit since our breakup. She has always been a health freak, and she normally dont drink, and always laugh at those drunken girls she see in the morning on their way home.
But since our breakup she has been out partying just about every weekend (Except one)…
I am thinking this is a normal, considering her new job, new school ect… There is some social preasure…
You are still obsessing over her or trying to do things to get her attention. Just focus on yourself, it’ll make things easier at the end. It’s hard, we all know because we are going through it, but stay strong. These 30 days are supposed to be constructive for yourself, don’t just pass it thinking about her. Think about yourself. You are doing great.
im in the same situation… we all are. i havent heard from my ex in 2 weeks. and im driving myself crazy thinking about her, waking up multiple times each night with deep pains in my heart, and im pretty sure shes dating someone else. she prob doesnt give a F* what im feeling or doing. NC is supposed to be for me but im just freezing myself out.
I know we all have reasons why we broke up, and obviously we are trying to learn from our mistakes and either move on or mend the relationship. But the point we all have to face is that we are worth more than we are giving ourselves credit for. I hate being both the bad guy for mistakes i made in the relationship and the victim for the break up.
I was thinking to myself this morning… HOW MUCH OF OUR LIVES ARE WE GOING TO WASTE OVER SOMEONE WHO DOESNT WANT US IN THEIR LIFE?
I read a quote that reads " It’s better to have nobody than to have someone who is half there, or doesn’t want to be there"
We have to give ourselves more credit. We’re still good people and want good things. I could have seen my ex as my wife and having kids together and living happily ever after but its obvious thats not happening.
So what can we do? only one thing… move on. Believe that there is someone else out there who is right around the corner. This person is looking for us. Praying for us, and has been waiting for us to come into their life. We learned from our mistakes, made ourselves better, and now this new person can treat us better.
I know im saying this to the group but also to myself. There must be a reason this is all happening. We dont know why its happening but we have to believe its for the best.
Yes, we deserve better. Someone who is half way there is more hurtful even though you have the comfort of having someone to fall back on. But in the long run, not good for either one of you. I guess, I am glad my ex bf realized that and broke it off. If he comes back, I’ll only accept him if he’s ready for give all of himself. Not part of himself.
I wont say I am obsessing over her (Any more)
I am trying to do a lot for myself, and ofcause I want to “show off” to her. And yes, a text or 2 from her that I can ignore would really make my day.
You people have felt like that to right?
I personally think that the reason I want a text from her that I can ignore, is because I see it as a confirmation that the NC is working. (That is how I would feel about it)
Anyone agree?
It finally happend. She send me a text. A happy one. And I am ignoring it
I wont lie: It feels good…
She is a very serious athlete, and I am very interrested in that sport as well. So during our relationship I was always the one she turned to for advice and to talk about it. So when she texted me today it was ofcause because of some big news regarding her sport. My mind can come up with 100´s of reasons to answer her text and talk to her about it… BUT I WONT!! I need to be strong.
She has other friends with the same interest as us, so I am sure she will go to them and talk instead. Maybe she already did? I dont know, but I am sure her mind is wondering now
Anyways, my focus is on myself now, and it feels goooooood
Another update from me
I know NC is about 2 things. One is for my healing and self improvement. The other is to make her mind start working and miss me.
I feel like the healing part is going very well. I hardly ever think about her during the day, and I have made many improvements.
She tried to contact me again
Like I said in one of the other posts, when I get a job in the city she lives in I am gonna sell my house and move. So today I posted on facebook that I had put my house up for sale, and “an exciting future waits ahead”
Ofcause she was the first to message me
Did you get a new job??
Good work man, keep it up. Sometimes the most tempting thing in the world is to say what you’re thinking, but sometimes words just don’t cut it. You’re on the right track!
She didn´t text me anymore yesterday. I hope I am on her mind
Either she is wondering what the heck is going on (good sign for me)
Or she doesn´t think about it, and that would mean she never had any feelings for me.
What to do after NC?
When my NC is over and we start talking again how should I reply when she asks why I never replied to her texts?
a) “you said you needed to be yourself, so I gave you the space you needed. And to be honest I kinda needed some space as well to move on”
b) “Sorry, I just have so much going on right now, I completely forgot about it. How are you?”
Update from me
I just tried to make an update on facebook again. This time regarding something that is soon gonna happend in my life (not gonna get into details her)
I KNOW it is something that interrests her, and that she would wanna ask about it. But she didn´t text me. Guess she took the hint when I did not reply the last 2 times. But at least I was on her mind, and that was the point of it
She needs to see these amazing things that is happening.
Week 3
I am now going into week 3, and as I can read around the web week 3 is where she would start missing me the most?
She is also coming to town after week 3 for a short vacation. I am very excited as to what is gonna happend. Will we bumb into eachother? Will she write me and ask to see me?
Yay she texted me
I made another Facebook update about this thing I mentioned before. (Yes I use facebook a lot, but this time I was not trying to get her attention with it)
She texted me “wow that sounds really exciting”
I guess the keyword here would be “exciting”… I am no longer her borring ex.
Keep up the NC, right???
Hey creed… yes keep up the NC. You’re doing really great. Let her think why aren’t you replying.
And hey I too started second round of NC and I would really appreciate if you go through my thread and give your views on it.
Yes! She reached out again today. Out of the blue there was a text “Hi, how are you doing?”
Again: I think the NC is working on her. I am in day 17, and haven´t felt better.
Thanks to those who read this and comment on this topic. It is a great “therapy” to have others to talk to. I will read your stories tomorrow and give my feedback as well…
When I read stories like yours I feel so damn proud!! She is going crazy over there. Keep it up boy, you are on the right path, please let me know how it goes!!
I just like to update this thread with my thoughs, and get some feedback, as it makes the NC way easier to me