Ok thanks. Here is another. She is a bit insecure of herself so the chances of her dropping this guys and staying single are rather slim. What would be the best approach to this?
Here is a more expanded view of my question above.
I know that she regrets being intimate with him and she is ashame and feeling guilty about it and that fact that I know makes her try to avoid me since I know what she did. She knows that what she did hurt me. How can I show being happy when she knows that this particular action hurt me deeply, won’t that show that I don’t care?
What’s is the best course of action here?
That’s being the case she is a bit insecure of herself so the chances to drop this guy and be single are rather slim since she rather not be alone.
What would be the be approach to this?
Sorry for the constant bothering. This are just questions and scenarios I rather be prepared for.
All victory lies in the preparation of the non obvious, thus I want to be ready and think ahead just in case.
Well the last girl I dated was like that, where she had this sort of need to be with someone, eventually even she got so sick of the bs her long term bf of about 2 years gave her that she broke up with him. Keep in mind she was head over heels for this guy for 2 years. So my point is even if she is insecure eventually she will probably break up if the relationship goes south.
With this same girl, the most positive reaction I got was walking away, acting like I didn’t care and going NC. Before NC she claimed she had no feelings and saw me as just a friend, since the start of NC she has made many attempts to contact me, is very emotional when we talk and frankly shows most of the signs of feelings, basically since I am no longer around and act like I do not need her, her interest in me has increased dramatically.
So from my experience, it really does help to walk away and act aloof, it all boils down to getting past it and showing independence and strength of character. She’s not stupid, she knows she hurt you but acting upset about it just shows you can’t be mature and move on, which is a huge turn off and seriously kills your chances. But it’s key to not just act over it but actually work to get over it, you can’t hold grudges and try again with her it will end very badly when the bad feelings eventually come back up.
Well now you are at the same place as me.
We need to stay NC and not care about them. So they think they lost us.
Yet, we still need to show them that we are OK. That there is no hard feelings, and they should not feel guilty. If they want to approach us it is OK.
I think the best approach to this is to keep it light every time you meet with her. Flirt with her, good eye contact, good smile, ask about her and be interrested in what she has been up to. But always make sure to keep it short, so she will reach out later on to continue your talk.
Never ever bring up anything about your past or the break up. And if she starts to appoligies for the break up, just wipe it off with a “ahh dont worry about it. You did what you had to do and I dont blame you for anything”.
Thanks both of you of the input. Really helps a lot.
This girl is hitting me hard… She is now doing or prepping to do all the things that i wanted to do with her and we never did… renting out a house to visiting an amusement park, going camping… etc. i asked her for months to do this things and we never did. now is she more driven to do this things more than she ever was…
i put i pic/s up instagram about me making some progress and she lashes back with all this plans… wth… i think i may just keep from putting stuff up. we arent friends but im sure she has mutual friends checking up what i put up. last time i put something up she reacted by putting up a pic of her and the new guy as her profile pic. what is she so set on doing this?
Being completely honest I think you are still very deeply upset and are reading way too much into what she is doing. You need to take a step back and try to move on, it’s not healthy. I am not trying to come across as insulting, we have all been there, but that’s why I want to help. Short of her being a petty, rude person a good 9/10 times whatever she posts or does is just her doing her own thing, granted once in a while it may be directed towards you but for the most part it’s our overthinking ex mindset making things up.
You are right. Im still very upset about it. I never in a lifetime would expected this from her, the way she when behind my back and started dating someone else while we still dated and then just dump me. We had a close and tie connection and relationship with one another, yes we had many downs and up but we still were there and cared for each other.
I know is not healthy and im trying to move on but i just cant get her of my mind no matter how busy i try to stay. This girl meant the world to me and my world revolved around her.
I think im at a point were im going to let this go permanently. This girl is doing things that i never expected she would do. I had her on a golden pedestal and on high regards and respect for her as an individual and as a woman but with this guy she continue to give herself away so freely, the fact that she continues to be intimate with him i dont think i cant get back with someone like that.
If it was one occasion i’ll see it as a mistake but its now a continue thing going constantly. I dont think i could date her again and always look over my shoulders.
Any advice is welcome
Anytime i put a pic up on instagram somehow not long after she comes up with a new pic of her and the new guys, it feels like she is doing it on purpose. WTH
*bump
Any suggestion on the prior post.
Also she wants to swing by this weekend to drop of few things of my. How should i go about it? And if she wants to get close and intimate how should i proceed?
I can hear you are still very upset about the situration.
If she wants to drop by with your things: let her! Be home to accept the things. Just be kind to her and say thanks and smile. Nothing else.
Normally when we drop of things at our ex’s we expect them to not be home (because seeing us is painfull to them), so we leave the stuff at the doorstep. That is how it normally goes.
Be home, be happy and show her this doesnt bother you at all.
You also talk about how she is doing all the things you wanted to do with her. Sorry but I cannot tell you her motivation for this. It seems very strange if you ask me, and I can understand how it must mess with your mind.
But I would like to remind you that in the first 6 months after break up our ex’s will change a lot. Even to the point were you stop up and think “who the hell is this person”!
The sweetest and most loveing girl may turn into a cold, heartsless bitch.
The quiet, stay-at-home girl becomes the crazy party girl.
I always tell this to people i talk to:
Dont ever judge your ex by what they do in the first 6 months after a break up.
They need to protect themselfs and move on, and they will use all the self-defence mechanism they can. They are not themselfs at this point, and you need to look the other way and not care. 
Thanks Creed. Just another update on the matter
She continue to text me yesterday after she mention she wanted to swing by to drop off few stuff. We text for a bit on and off, one of the things she mention is that we were happy for a while despite despite our issues, after that it was mainly casual chat and such. Was she remembering our times together?
They seem to continue going strong so i honestly think that this is it. He doesn’t seem like a bad guy so i dont see her dumping him unless something major happens.
Still dont understand nor ever will her reasons to proceed as she did and how she ended our relationship. We had ups and downs but we cared and loved each other so that’s why i don’t understand this.
It seems there is some trouble on the new relationship. Anyone with any takes on what should my stance be?
Told you so 
After the honeymoon phase passes, the new fling/relationship isnt so wonderfull afterall.
Do you know what kind of trouble its all about?
Not certain on what it’s but they seem to be running into some sort of issue. I know that they both have trust issues…
Yet she seems determine to fight on for the relationship.
She just text me, that she was wondering if we could ever be friends. my reply was i dont know the answer to that. that i wish her no ill will nor any bad on her. didnt know what else to put. dont wanna get friendzone nor be a jerk. any suggestions?
she also just mention that she misses me and misses hanging out with me… idk where this may lead to but any input is rather helpful.
to further expand on the above post. she has also mention nothing is fun anymore. and that to let her know when will it be ok for us to hang out.
Please some advice on the next steps???
bump
sry just looking for advice and a bit on the edge of my seat here 
another bump please the prior 3 post…