Yes u nees to be patient. If he really wanted to leave you, he would have applied for a divorce but he didnt. Just give him type and try to avaoid him as much as you can without being rude.
ugh my husbands an asshole, ugh. ok so I went to go get my oldest and he called I didnt get it and he sent me a text. I misread. so I said to him. your kidding me right. and he put why then he wrote he pays for the phones that I could at least let him talk to our oldest. ugh. I told him that I misunderstood his text. he said ok thanks. then he asked if I applied for medicaid. (nice way to kick me of his insurance) he also said to have our oldest call him soon because his lunch was almost over. (I called him and it rang a few times and went to voice mail. my oldest didnt want to talk to him either.) anyways I said why and that medicaid declined me and he texted twice to apply for obama care. (wtf) then he put lol and then put that the insurance ends in dec. (I guess meaning hes not planning on paying for me anymore.) he then called but my phones on vibrate and I was driving so i didnt hear it. and said hello in a voice mail message. he then sent a text saying:ok so thats how is gonna be I told you my lunch was gonna end you didnt let her call me. (that message pissed me off) I told my oldest to call him and talk in front of me. because she said I need to talk to daddy I just remember I needed to talk to him. I told her she should have called him earlier that his lunch was gonna end and then I see the message. (she called him in front of me and I told her to tell him that she didnt want to talk to him. she said she was angry hot and that mommy was annoying her.) ugh I have no idea what he told her. she keeps hiding stuff from me and doing things she shouldn’t. and they hung up. (im gonna make sure they have everything ready so when he comes they leave immediately. I feel very hurt and betrayed. idk what to do anymore. (he doesnt care about me having health insurance, he took out in my face that he pays for the phones. and he keeps doing and saying things that arent fair. on top of leaving in his mothers apartment (having to hear her mouth about she has to pay this and that and how expensive this bill is ect.) ugh Im so stressed out. what do ya think of all this? im gonna try to avoid him as much as possible. I feel so hurt all I wanna do is cry. Im so hurt and confused. Im trying to be nice, im trying to better myself and all I do is find my self in a deeper hole I cant seem to dig myself out of it. anyone please help. thanks @cassie @divjun
@divjun he has divorce papers filled out ready to turn in whenever he wants to. I dont think he ever loved me or he wouldnt be acting and treating me this way. ugh idk what to do anymore. I feel so depressed. 
and I hate that I miss him so much and hes acting like such a prick. ugh
I think I have lost him already. I guess I should just continue no contact and keep moving with my life. I guess I hoped to soon and I guess I have lost him already. I feel so depressed. I feel so down. all I wanna do is cry. Im not sure how much stronger I could be. ugh
I really dont have words now.
-.-
I literally dont understand men. The way he talked to you was rude.
Your situation is so tough that you cant avoid him completely. I feel like you should talk to him face to face and telling him what you actually feel and how hurt you are. And ask him straight what he actually wants now.
I m not sure about this move but im feeling terrible right now.
But I know he is angry and not in a good state of mind to have a talk like that. He would obviously try his best to avoid this talk.
But I feel for you. He is hanging you in between.
I feel the same way for me !
Im not doing the talk because a while back I wrote him a letter and he already knows how I feel. unless he starts talking about me and him then Im going to have to stay shut unfortunately. this is so painful and yes unfortunately I cant avoid him 100% even though i want to. ugh this is so hard for me. for sure the kids will be ready to go when he arrives. Im going to try to avoid him at all cost. I hate this. I feel really bad that he doesnt care about me or anything. ugh this aint fair.
How long its been that you both broke up?
And what did he say?
If you already wrote a letter then a talk would only add up to your problems. Do NC and try to be a strong woman. You can do this. 
since the beginning of Aug. but according to him before that because he was saying it. idk Aug was when he left me and moved out. he said he didnt love me anymore. that he was very hurt and that he didnt want to be with me or I dont remember well but ya. yes thats when I started round 2 of no contact. Im trying but its hard. I dont know how much more I can take and apparently he doesnt want me to be a part of his life. maybe I should just forget everything hes saying ignore it and move on. I need to be happy and all hes adding is pain. if he comes back great if hes doesnt who ever gets him can have my left overs. I cant continue in pain and hurting myself. I need to heal which is why im trying to avoid him at all cost. this is so hard. i wish hed miss me but I guess he doesnt. ugh im so hurt i cant do this anymore. ugh
You deserve to be happy. Just think that you don’t even know him. Heal yourself. Remain in NC. U both were together for 12 years its possible he might need a break. Having a break in a relationship is healthy. Let it be. Let him do whatever makes him happy. You should do whatever make you happy.
yeah this is so hard on me but I dont think im gonna be getting him back. I think Ive already lost him and this hurts really bad. I wish he’d come back but i’d only be fooling my self and hurting my self. this sucks im so sad and depressed.
I know expectations hurt like anything.
If you both are meant to be you both will end up together.
And every one has ups and down in their life. I would say dont expect much but dont be negative. Its all good.
ugh I hate when people use that phrase its very painful. im just trying to take it a day at a time. by his actions I dont see anything happening. im so hurt right now. I dont think this is fair. ugh… thanks for your words. @cassie what do you think of all of this? @bguarino @jortiz127 @a.z. anyone?
hey ya, Im very depress again. Im not sure what to do or think about this. I hate this feeling and everything. my mornings are good but I guess my husband is throwing my schedule off again. Also the health insurance things is kinda bothering me as well. I feel so depress, I guess I’m not ever going to get him back am I? I’ve preety much have no hope left. I wish there was someone here who could give me any advise and or hope. thanks
I know for sure that I lost my husband already. see he came inside my youngest open the door and he wanted to talk to me. I was down stairs but I ran upstairs. I came in my room and my children kept knocking on the door to come in to get something but he wanted to talk to me. my daughter was scratched by mistake with my nail and she ran to the bathroom so he was standing by the door and I went to check on my youngest. he looked at me so I said hi. He said to my oldest or allowed. “this is starting to get awkward” ugh. so I came back in my room. before this I was in my room and my kids kept knocking on my door trying to get me to talk to him so acting like they were gonna get something one time I was by my closet then I went behind the door. He said why was I hiding that if it was because I wasnt wearing any make up that he wouldnt look. ugh. anyways he kept telling them that it was important that he had to talk to me. one of the things I heard him mention was he wanted to know what I thought about him taking them to (his sisters church) on Sundays. (so much faking looking for God when hes acting like such a prick) anyways I didnt want to see or talk to him. who knows what crap he wanted to say to me but I know its stuff I dont want to hear. 12 years meant nothing to him. hes so selfish. I have no one to talk to or go to. his mom is on her stupid computer game and his sister is always on her games and knows nothing about relationships. I tried to call his cousin but I guess her phone is messed up. and my cousin betrayed me and my brothers or sister I cant count on them my mom ruined my life and my dads dead. my children left with him and are always happy when they go with him and im literally alone and keep wondering why am I here. I know ive lost him. he was on his stupid phone again. ugh im so hurt. I dont even want to text him. I feel so hurt I dont want to know what hes gonna say however i felt like sending him a text telling him sorry but I couldnt speak today. texting would be better for me unless he wants to meet somewhere to discuss what he wants to talk to me about. I miss him so much and love him so much. I feel like my life is over. I have no one. Im all alone. the only person that I want is him and hes causing me all this pain. what do ya think about this and what should I do? im very scared and alone. the only place I thought I could come and say these things was on here. anyone please I feel really desperate. help me. thanks @cassie @bguarino @a.z. anyone? ugh I hate this. 
ugh im getting really depressed again and idk what to do. is there anyone who could give me their opinion on my situation. I think my marriage is a lost cause.
When he contacts you about the children, be really cool and polite with him. Make sure the conversation doesn’t extend from that (unless it’s something else that’s important, family, insurance etc)
If you feel tempted to say how you feel, hold it back the best you can.
Take a month out from all this and do some stuff for yourself. Stick with it too. I hope everything works out for you.
@Hamuel thanks for replying. so do you think I really screwed up when I ignored him and blew him of? im on my second round of no contact and feel like nothing is gonna work for me but a miracle. should I send him a text apologizing or what should I do? im scared every time hes around because I feel like hes gonna keep hurting me ect. Im trying to avoid him at all cost. what do you think? how should I go about all of this? its just I really miss him. I hate hearing him calling me by my name. its really hurtful.
I can’t imagine what you’re going through seriously, I’m sorry that you feel like this.
But as a male, if I feel that I no longer what to be with a particular person I’d be doing what he’s doing to you right now, but saying that what drives me as equally crazy is when it looks like that person no longer talks to me. No contact even the second time around can drive a guy crazy, he’ll start double guessing what he’s done, miss those genuinely happy memories with you. It just takes time, but it’s what you do in that time that really helps you out in the future. I don’t think you screwed up, you just realised it’ll take longer than you thought it would!
Keep doing what you’re doing and stick with it. With in a month, maybe even 3 weeks you’ll see what it’s doing to him.
Good luck and all the best.
Oh man Your husband seems to be really confused and to be honest, so do you. I don’t think you should apologize to him for not speaking with him, just do no contact until he contacts you again and then see what it is he wanted to speak about. Right now you just need to stay strong and focus on you. Of course it sucks with the insurance but you are the mother of his children so of course he is going to help you out and maybe you even get that job you were speaking about earlier - that would be a great thing for you and then you also wont be so dependent on him. He will for sure also be impressed Take it one day at a time, you’re doing really great!
Dont be so depressed about it. Your a strong woman and you can deal with this I know.
Dont apologise to him but try not to ignore him that much. Dont talk about personal stuff.
Your doing great keep it up.