Oh yes, how can I forget to say “thank you!!!” For all the support and love! hugs to you all!
we all appreciate everything MrsWB! please enjoy yourself 
mom deserves a vacation! haha.
AH that sucks MrsWB. Hope you are ok and are feeling better and you do deserve a wrest. If you ever need to talk we are all here. Thank you again for everything.
As for me I’m just being casual with my ex. I almost feel too casual? Is that even a thing ? I feel like we are havjng the same boring conversation over and over again… how was your day? Etc. She wasn’t enthusiastic yesterday like you guys saw. Lets see what she is like today.
So i replied to her text when i got home and said “Had a really good day today had to work on a production the uni might publish. How has your day been?”
Do you think keeping like thisnis good? Or amci being boring by talking about the same thing all the time? And good advice for interesting conversation starters/topics? Thanks!
Ok so I’ve been abit frustrated today but didn’t show it to her. At times I felt like whats the point in talking and like i didnt even want to talk to her cause she’s not showing much interest. I can show you the conversation we’re having and see what you guys think. Thanks.
Me:Had a really good day today had to work on a production the uni might publish. How has your day been?
Ex: Really what sort of production. It’s good thank you
Me: It’s a superhero concept we’re working on but with our own twist. Been working on it all day it’s been good then a group of us went for something to eat.
Ex: Oh that’s so cool ahhh I’m glad your enjoying it
At this point she didn’t carry the conversation and i was getting annoyed so i wanted to phone so we could talk as text just seems so boring so i hinted that and just said…
Me: Are you busy?
(Usually i say this before i call)
Ex: I’m still not ready to talk on the phone plus I feel really ill I think I’m coming down with something sorry I don’t mean to be horrible
Of course I was upset so i tried to make it look like i didnt want to call but was wondering why she wasn’t replying so good so i said…
Me: Ok
I didnt mean to call i meant it seems like you’re busy or tired? Anyway hope you feel better
Ex: No sorry I’m not busy I can chat I was just chatting to brother at the time
I’ve been looking after a sick girl today and every time I move I feel really Nauseous and headache
Me: You need a hot water bottle and snoop
( we nicknamed her dog snoop … can you guess why lol)
Ex: Snoop only goes where chicken is
I have no chicken
Me: What was wrong with the girl? Have you caught soemthing off her or just physiological
Ex: She was just being sick all the time and I might have caught it cause I feel really sick
Me: Ah that’s shit you should probably sleep would you rather speak tomorrow ?
I wanted to see if she wanted to talk cause she wasn’t extending the conversation
Ex: No it’s fine I can talk
Me: You think you’ll be ok for work?
Ex: I hope so can’t take a day off
Me: I’m sure if you feel sick you can’t come in after 24 hours?
Ex: It’s only if you’ve been physically sick or the shits
She wasn’t giving me anything to go off so i just said…
Me: You should be ok
Ex: Yeah hopefully
I didn’t reply to this as it seemed like she didnt want to talk but then she replied about 5mins later saying…
Ex: Snoop joined me
Ex: She’s left now
Ex: Scratches weren’t good enough
Me: Poor snoop its a good thing her breath will make you physically sick
(Her dog has extremely bad breath and we use to make fun of it so i tried to be funny…lol)
It’s weird she litteraly tells me she wants to talk but doesn’t show interest in conversation. Am i going about this the right way? Is our conversations too boring? Is she showing negative signs? Or is this good progress? She hasn’t replied to my last message and usually she’s either instant or within 5-10mins. It’s been 25. Not sure if these conversations are good. I feel like I’m making all the effort at the moment. Am i?
I know i might seem like im overthinking just don’t want to mess things up if it is positive progress. Thanks.
So she replies the longest she’s ever replied to me an hour and 20mins with
Ex: She’d make me vacate a building with her breath
So i replied
Me: I know try not to puke on any kids tomorrow let me know how you got on
Me: Good night
Ex: I’ll try, will do thanks night night
I usually don’t reply to her for anything from 10-50 mins. Is this a bad? Not sure if this is positive signs from her or not to be honest.
Hey Ironblood: i will only be here for a quick second. Please just listen to me, you have made progress already. You’re communicating. You need to stop overthinking and appreciate that she is talking to you compared to all of us here. Be grateful for every little thing. When she told you she did not want to speak on the phone, you wanted to anyway because you were annoyed. That was disrespectful. There is no room for annoyance here. You’re broken up already. You wanted contact, you got it. Stop asking for more than she is not willing to give. It’s not healthy anymore. Remember: space, time, growth.
Thank you for taking time out for this MrsWB appreciate it.
I’m just not dealing with this well as i feel when she replies now compared to the day we first talked she’s not putting as much effort and I’m scared this is just pushing her away. I know i shouldn’t over think I’m trying…lol.
I just can’t handle small talk between us. I feel like it’s going no where. Like the more we talk the less she’s interested.
hey ironblood, I can see where you are coming from. As it is hard to see improvements with these subtle talks but maybe this is what she wants and needs. To slowly rebuild what you guys had. again, try not to think so much in it lol as i know it is hard for you. Easier said than done since i am not in this position but i feel you. Best you can do now is just be there for her have small talks and when shes ready to open up, she will. Try not to ask her to talk on the phone or anything that may be too much for her to handle. I am sure she will reach out to you when she is ready (like the first time, she called you so fast!) so take it easy bro and dont get so overwhelmed. You two are making a lot more progress than any of us haha.
Thanks Pingpong. I guess I can’t expect her to just come running back and be all talkative. She does show mix signals but I guess that’s just her or me over analysing as usual.
Yesterday I kind of left it to her with my last text
“I know try not to puke on any kids tomorrow let me know how you got on
Good night”
So at the moment it is up to her to reply. I did this so she could also put the effort in so I don’t feel like the only one. Now I just wait if she replies or texts me today. So as of now I’m going back to nc unless she texts me as i feel like I’m suddenly the one starting and ending conversations.
I hope this is the right thing to do :).
How has everyone been?
It seems like you did the right thing, leaving it to a way that she must answer. If she replies , than she does if not so be it but yes I think so NC until she messages you back is a good idea.
I’m doing decent today. Not as great as yesturdsy but way better than the other weeks. I was feeling curious and checked my ex’s Twitter. As I am still following her on it and she is also following me (but I never use Twitter or ever post ANYTHING. I made an account cause it was just a fad) but anyways she still has our photos on her Twitter profile. I know she uses it to check for traffic and stuff and check up on TMZ for celebrity scandals and stuff. Unless she stopped using it suddenly but I don’t think so. She doesn’t post anything on Twitter but just follows ppl and reads thing. It gave me hope still but Isunno what to think of it. Any insight on this? Well back to work for me!
…weird. she just messaged me a simple “how was uni” as I’m just about to complain about how she hasn’t replied but she has been home for 3+hours. It’s so freeking weird how everytime i come here to vent about her not speaking or replying or just acting weird she does something. This can’t be a coincidence lol? This has happened so many times if you read my posts! …Also, it seems my ex has shortened her texts dramatically … any idea why?
Not sure about the profile picture pingpong. It could be a positive sign that she hasn’t moved on or it could be she just hasn’t bothered to change it. However as i said my ex has photos we took when we were out (not of us but the locations that we first hung out that clearly mark a special time when we were together) So I’m not sure.
How long have you been nc? Also what do you work as?
Heys guys! So i didn’t reply to her message as i was talking to my family and got carried away and lost track of time. Anyway after about an hour she rang and i had a missed call off her. I saw it then replied “did you call?” Followed by a phone call. The message hasn’t delivered and she also didn’t pick up the phone. Not sure what’s going on but thought I’d update it here.
Hmm no idea why she shortened her text’s maybe she’s not feeling it so much today? As you did say she was feeling sick so when we are sick, we aren’t in the greatest mood. Give it a few days when she gets better, perhaps her mood will change then.
As for my situation, you might be right maybe she just hasn’t gotten to change her profile. As I don’t want get get my hopes up. I am feeing better tho, like I am ready to give her my letter but it hasn’t been even 1 week yet lmao. Only 6 days of NC so far. I told myself give it a month. Hopefully she will contact me before I contact her. That would be nice, but no hopes on it.
I majored biochemistry in uni before but got bored of books and so am a carpenter (something I really enjoy) and I flip properties.
Only 6 days? Dude! You have alot of hope believe me in that case she will most likely contact you in the next week or two if not tomorrow! You have alot of hope since this was your first break up right? Dude! I’m happy for you because her twitter may also be a sign of a positive sign. Try not to focus on when to give the letter, it’s good to have handy but you may want to change it as the coming days/weeks pass by and you rethink things. If she hasn’t contacted you by 21 days then sure send it but I think she probably will. I would save the letter for as late as possible so it can make more of an impact as she would miss you alot.
As for me and my ex tonight has been weird. I ignored her text to reply later but i also missed a call by accident. By the time i replied im assuming she’s asleep so i missed a good chance to talk :(.
This is how the conversation has come out today.
Ex: How was uni 7:40pm
Missed call from ex 8:23pm
Me: Did you phone? 9:06pm
I then attempted to call her at
9:07pm and 9:30pm
Me: Uni was good hope work was ok, didn’t see your messages if you’re a sleep we can talk tomorrow night 9:46pm.
I regret taking my time to reply as i should have known she goes to sleep early. I really feel bad as i want to talk to her and dont want to make her feel as if i dont care :(. Have i fucked up by missing the chance to talk? Or is it ok? I really miss her. Is this driving her away? Ah this sucks. It’s currently 9:55pm and no signs of her even being online. I feel like I’ve fucked up. I truly want to progress but i feel like I’m messing it up.
ironblood…
You are not patient at all dude, you can’t expect REAL progresses in a bunch of days! It’s impossible! This kind of progresses take place in weeks.
You absolutely have to forget that things are or can be as before when you interact with her, I repeat, it takes TIME to regain trust or to feel comfortable enough to reach that closeness again. You two broke up, there was a separation here dude that you don’t seem to see, and it’s not only physical, it’s emotional!.
So quit being demanding and let this takes the right course without rushing or pushing her because it will backfire you.
I know i shouldn’t be rushing or demanding but i dont mean to be… so today has been weird. I always feel as if she doesn’twant to talk but i guess i need to get yse to casual talk.
We had a little conversation today and i also asked again if she wanted to call as i missed her call yesterday. (That is thr only reason i asked)
She said she was watchinf something with her mom and that she would maybe call me tomorrow. So i insisted jn saying that was fine and that I’d let her carry on watching the show.
She messaged back saying “you can still talk im not bus”
So i replied an hour later sayinf "oh it seemed like you were "
She replied “noo”
So i left it for 2 hours cause how can i reply to “noo” lol.
So i sent another message but i think it didnt deliver on whatsapp so i went into panic mode like what if she tried to call or message me and im not recieving hers and shes not recieveing mine. So at 12am i messaged her saying “didn’t realise messages didn’t send are you still awake?”
She replied “yeah”
I asked if my messages sent and she didn’t reply so i assumed it was happening again. So i called her and she hung up. I thought it was my wifi or something so i did it again. Same thing. Then she replied saying “sorry give me a sec”
So i obviously was like wtf is going on in my head so i replied “ok”
She then messaged back saying
“Can I ring tomorrow please brothers coming drunk I’m trying to help him out”
I replied " Yeah that’s fine my whatsapp is playing up btw good luck"
And she simply replied " Ok thanks"
In conclusion i think that i kind if annoyed her. Im nit tryjng to bug her for a phone call but it looks like i am. I just wanted to phone her back from yesterday and today i was just checking if my whatsapp was working. Am i messing this up? I feel like i am. Sorry to keep coming here. Im not trying to rush things its just technical difficulties are fucking me up. I want the best chance possible.
Sometimes I also run out of things to say. Not sure where i am with her to be honest. Feel like giving up. But i can’t. I want her back and I’m willing to go as slow as a snail lol. Just want some clarification that I’m nit completely fucking things up. Thanks
I made a spelling mistake and to make it clear basically i ended the conversation by saying ill let you watch your show and she replied “you can still talk I’m not busy”
As in no i still want to talk lol. *
I could see she was still online so i dropped a last message saying
“How’s your brother doing didn’t mean to stress you out”
Not sure if this was the right thing to do but i was just trying to be polite in case i stressed her out. (She gets panicked/annoyed/stressed out easily when her brother goes out and she has to be the baby sitter so i guess phoning her while she was textinf him wasn’t a good idea but u wasn’t to know)
She replied
“i’m in his room waiting for him to come back his not back yet not sure what’s goin on”
Lol. It’s like you guys have a legitimate story to read everyday so what has ironblood got up to today!?
I have this thought in my head that im messing it up but i dont think i am. Just over reacting to nothing. I need to get a grip before i actually do fuck up.
So i sent her one last message so everything was in the open about the technical difficulties. I said
“Is he ok or is he just drunk? It seems like an inconvenient time for you so I’ll let you save him and just to clarify didn’t mean to spam call didn’t think whatsapp was working. Let me know how it goes”
The end. Good night guys hope i havnt messed up or annoyed her.