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[a.z]

I’m not doing good Daniel.
Last night,one of our mutual friends called me and said that he wanted to meet me somewhere near my place.I asked him what happened and he said he just wanted to talk to me about something important and that it takes me less than 15 minutes.I really thought it was something important cuz the last time we talked i told him that if he wants to be my friend he doesn’t have to say a word about my ex.So i went there and then my ex showed up.My friend told me he was sorry and that he thought it was the best idea,he gave me a hug and left the place.

I was shocked,angry,sad,uncomfortable and every other feeling that makes a person feel bad.
My ex started the conversation with why are you doing this to us? he kept saying the same things and he was like he couldn’t even hear me.It makes me so sad i don’t even wanna talk about the details but i told him that i care about him and seeing him like that is the last thing i want to see in this world.I said he should forget about everything and that we will never get back together.I swear,the moment i was leaving the place was one of the most painful moments of my life.He was crying and i felt even worse than the night we broke up.I felt even worse than the day my grandpa died.So believe me when i say i had one of the most terrible nights of my life.
I came home,i was crying like crazy and the new guy called me.He called me twice when i was with my ex but i didn’t answer him and when i got home i was too busy crying so i didn’t call him back.
He asked me why i wasn’t answering my phone,i said i was sorry,something happened,i wasn’t home and i couldn’t talk.Then i asked him if we could talk about it later and he said no.I don’t know why but once again i couldn’t control my anger.and the rest of our conversation went like

Me:but i don’t want to talk about it now.

G:Oh,you don’t want to talk about it now.

Me:I have to go.I will call you later.

G:When are we gonna talk about it?where have you been?why are you talking to me like this?

Me:I said i’m not ok (I really couldn’t control my feelings and i was obviously crying )

G:Are you crying?i’m sorry i was just worried.Why are you crying,did i do something wrong?

I told him that my friend called me,i went there and i met my ex.

G:oh ok.I guess there is nothing i can do to make you feel better.I’m sorry i had no idea what was going on.Now i understand how much you care about him.

Me:what do you mean?

G:nothing,you care about him and..whatever i’ll call you tomorrow.And he hung up the phone.

He called me today and said
G:Hey,how are you?

Me:i’m good.I’m sorry about last night i didn’t mean to make you sad.

G:but you did.

Me:cuz i didn’t answer your calls?or cuz you think i care about him?

G:yes and i don’t think that you care about him.I’m sure that you care about him too much.I don’t know what i am,your boyfriend?so why didn’t you answer my calls when you were with your ex,telling him how much you care about him.Listen i don’t wanna make anything worse but thats just not what i’m looking for.I did ask you about your feelings for your ex and you made me feel like you were over him.I know you care about him but you cry for him and thats different.You are not over him.I want our relationship to be more than this and you are not ready.I can’t be the one who you talk to when you cry because you care about your ex.

Me:i didn’t want you to be the one who i talk to when i feel sad because of my ex.You made me tell you what happened when i wasn’t ready.

G:so are you saying you wanted to hide your true feelings?You wanted some more time so you could tell me about everything so you could act like you didn’t care?

Me:i can’t convince you to believe me but its not what you think.I care about him and it means i don’t want him to be sad because of me.

G:hey thats bullshit.Do you want me to believe that you were crying only because you didn’t get back with him and he is sad?thats bullshit,he is sad,you hate that you made him cry and you cry.can you tell me how exactly you define love?

Me:i said i’m not trying to make you believe anything.

G:because you can’t.What do you think love is?

Me:stop it.I don’t love him anymore.I don’t want to be with him.He knows everything about you and i thought you could understand me.

G:who do you think i am?why didn’t you answer me when you were with him?don’t tell me that you didn’t hear it or anything like that.

Me:ok i’m sorry.I couldn’t tell you where i was when you had no idea what happened.

G:You still feel something for him.I want to trust you when you say you don’t want to get back with him but how long do i have to wait until you forget him?I don’t want to be that jealous boyfriend but i think you need some time to get over your feelings for him.

Me:I do care about you and i never wanted you to feel this way.I do care about our relationship and i wanted things to become stronger between us.I understand you and i guess you’re right,no one can handle that.I want you to know that i’m really done with my ex but if you think we need some space,i respect that.I’m really sorry about everything.

G:Aright,i got you.I need some time to think about everything.Its not like a break or anything.I just need to find out if i can accept this.You are the only one i liked so much after 5 years and i was expecting something more than this.Thats not your fault.

A:Its ok.I understand you.You’re not mad at me .are you?

G:No,i’m not.

A:cool

G:I’ve gotta go,take care.

A:you too.

I’m sorry this one was too long and i know it was really boring :D.

[Robot 3]

a.z.,

I’m sorry that this happened to you!

To be honest, I liked you ex’s trick! Even though in reality it backfires but I liked the idea! It was just like me going to her office to surprise with my presence or just like sinead (what’s your new name? 😉 ) who called her ex with a new number! I also liked his friend for helping him! Thanks to him!!

Well, it was something misfortune! I guess you should wait and see what happens here! Well, to my understanding you have stronger feelings for your ex! Az G said, why should you cry if you did not have feelings for him? For this reason, I recommend you to wait until G call you back!

Stay strong a.z.!! We are all with you! Unlike others I don’t ask you to move on because I respect the persistence of you ex! I think time will help you to sort out the problem!

Best of luck!!

[Robot 3]

Daniel,

To me you are a champion!! I tip off my hat for you! 🙂

sunshineinthegarden,

You are also strong!! Good job so far!!

[Daniel]

Az,
God can i love you?
You really resemble my ex. I also did what your ex did. I asked hos bro to do the same thing. I had balloons and surprises for her really sweet. It was also in a public place. But as dara said it backfires. Thanks to your story now i understand that even after my surprise why my ex didnt want to get back with me. Coz even tho she dtill cares orlove me the urge to be apart is strong for her because somehow she knew it was te right thing. Az all i wish for you is to be happy. Understand the behavior of your new guy. If it was me i’ll feel the same way. Please dont feel low for too long. We love here buddy. Hope all goes well with your new relationship. Drop the ex. Every single drop of hope give it up.

[Daniel]

Dara, well this champ’s hero is you. I really looked up to you because your NC before was great abd like youre ready to move on. Honestly i felt bad when you got crazy and depressed over your ex this past weeks. Can you blame me? If your hero or idol is struggling you’d feel bad about it right?

Dara, everytime i get rejected even the slightest like girl not replying to my message i miss my ex. Idk why. Have you experiences the same?

[a.z]

Thank you so much guys x
Yeah,at first i was mad at our friend but he is such a good friend.I know he really wants us to be together.

I’m not contacting G.tbh,he is right.I like him and i really wanted to have a good relationship with him but he knows how much i care about my ex and anything he said was just normal.

I’m sure i don’t want to get back with my ex.I really don’t want that.I just want him to be happy but maybe i should really stop worrying about him.He was the one who left me for 7 months.I’m really done with him.

I like G,i understand him and i really wish he could understand me.

[Daniel]

Az,
If he loves you he will understand. Thats it. Dont contact him. Let him intiate it. If he doesnt then hea not worthy.

[Robot 3]

Daniel,

I still believe that you are the champ here! In those days, I never thought that my might be dating someone else! I had taken her for granted even after the breakup!! ha ha ha ha….

I don’t feel bad about being rejected! I don’t miss my ex! I feel good because I took a risky step and tried my luck! Even rejection makes me feel good!

I miss my ex when I date someone! When I am dating someone I keep comparing her with my ex! It was maybe a week ago that during the date I started staring at a point! Then I realized that this girl is moving her hands in front of my eyes! I was thinking about my ex and how nice it was if my ex was instead of her!

Oh! You mean when she stop replying you at some point? Maybe! But very slightly! My ex loved me extremely in the beginning of our relationship! I had hard time to convince her that it’s too early to post pictures on FB! We had sex in the first week! She wanted to take me to all her friends from the beginning! She wrote me love letters during the bliss!

Now these new b**ches–they take it too slow! If I text them they will reply otherwise they don’t! This new chic–she writes me very small texts! So I reply her very short! Nothing is going to work with these new ones too! I should take my time and enjoy these days! It should happen! I can’t force a relationship to happen!

What you feel should be normal I guess! People have different feelings! My ex did not reply me much lately! So it does not make me miss her!

[a.z]

You made me feel good Daniel x.He absolutely doesn’t love me LOL.NO,i will never contact him 😉 😀

[Daniel]

Dara,
Its so hard to find for a potential girlfriend. And when you do there is no certainty if you can get her. The chase is feels good. I can immidiately tell if i like the girl or not. The level of excitement is different haha.

[Daniel]

Az,
Maybe hes just taking his time processing what happened. If he is serious about you he will contact you. Im glad i made you happy in a way. 🙂

[a.z]

You’re absolutely right xoxo

[Daniel]

Az,
Btw. So far you are the most active here. Dont you go to work or school? Just wondering haha.

[Steve]

Hey AZ

Read your post about the meeting up with your Ex and I think that is quite a cruel trick. If he couldn’t be upfront with meeting you and had to do it through subtle and trickery, that is quite unfair on you. No wonder you were upset and emotional and you had every right to be

Hopefully your new date really understands what happen. Reading the messages you wrote it sounded like he was throwing a little tantrum. Honestly calling you a couple of times over the night is showing a little desperation and insecurity from his behalf. A guy should be secure enough in his relationship that if the girl doesn’t answer the phone, he can trust that she will call back when its suitable to her, rather then constant calling.

Hopefully your new guy will have a good think about what he is losing and come back being supportive 🙂

[a.z]

Thank you so much steve,i agree with you.I think my ex is really selfish.He didn’t get back with me when he knew i really wanted him back.He knew i was sad but he didn’t care.He didn’t do anything to make me feel better and now that he wants me back,he is being selfish one more time.

Yeah,G was really angry and you’re right.He was showing insecurity.I guess its because of my ex.He told me he likes that i care about my ex but a part of him didn’t like that.I didn’t like the way he talked to me and i really tried to control my anger.He was almost shouting and if he is that kind of a person i’m glad we never started anything serious.But i don’t know why a part of me thinks he has the right to be mad at me.And only this feeling stopped me from acting like the old a.z :))))

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