Young love

Breakup Help reconciliation
1

Hello,
I recently ended things with my boyfriend of a year and three months a couple days ago. We are freshans at a university, and got together during the beginning of our senior year of HS. He is my first boyfriend, and my first( and only it feels like) true love. Things were great in the beginning and up until four months ago. We were the couple everyone was jealous of. Firstly, there’s some things that need to be adressed about him, he and his family are very close, and really only have eachother. He’s never really had a lot of close friends, and to compensate the lack of male friendships in his life, he seeked relationships with girls a lot. He also is very, or was very dedicated to living a sober life, so things haven’t really changed in college. We got roomed right across the hall from eachother, so we were with eachother all the time. Since I have many trust issues, and the relationship started off with me having to fight for him essentially, I was clingy and had no trust in him a lot of the time.

This deeply bothered him in the end. Towards the end, hence why I ended this is that he tried to breakup with me a couple times, but stayed with me because I begged, and because he does love me. But I definitely payed the price for it. A couple days ago I had enough when he said I was basically boring him, and that he wasn’t valuing our time together anymore. He’s the best guy I’ve ever met, and we have grown and been eaxhothers best friends. I don’t see me ever meeting someone better than him, I’m completely and utterly heartbroken, but I know I cannot be with someone who puts me down like that, so that’s why I ended it myself. It’s so hard because we both agreed on time and space, especially him of course, but I see him all the time because we basically live together. He’s the type to not express his emotions so he’s acting hostile and obnoxious with his friends, knowing I can probably hear. There’s a lot but basically I guess I just want some more advice. Is there hope? I can’t imagine being with anyone else, I truly feel he is one of a kind. Almost 32 no direct contact but we do have a class together and we live so close. Help:(

2

It’s been 4 days now, and gosh it feels like it’s really been weeks. I’ve been avoiding staying in my dorm, I slept somewhere else last night. But now I’m back and I’ve seen him around. I try to stay out of sight, and I’m really starting to feel better. But I still can’t eat or sleep. One thing I should mention is that 24 hours after the breakup I talked to him do to an anxiety attack. I asked how he was doing and he said fine just trying to stay busy, but that he didn’t like the way things ended. I asked if he still loved me and he replies “well I care about you a lot”. When I start confessing that he was my best friend and I was his he agreed and started to get teary eyed, and said he was sorry that he wasn’t the person I thought he was. It just seems cold. However as of yesterday he still has notes I wrote to him up and the cards I have him up.

3

Caring about someone is great, but being in love with someone is much different. Even though he’s sorry about the way the relationship ended, there’s no excuse for how he treated you and put you down. He showed you that he’s not a kind person. Please don’t think there aren’t men out there that would have better qualities than him. Some men are much kinder, thoughtful, sweeter etc and would never put you down for any reason! I’m sorry you’re going through this and that it’s affected your eating and sleeping. Try to focus more on your studies and enjoying time with your friends. If you get into another relationship, let go of trust issues and just have fun. Guys don’t like drama and will run from it every time.
Praying the best for you…