My ex is dating someone casually, or so she says it isn’t serious
But I know shes went on at least two dates in the past three to four weeks.
Will she miss me if she’s distracted by someone else?
She said this person is just okay and talks a lot and she’s not used to it. But she likes this person enough to “hang with” and to go on a second date (which has already happened). That’s when I decided NC would be best. We had a loving and caring last conversation and I didnt tell her I wasnt going to stop communicating. For about five days she kept texting me good night. I love you. And even texted me Good luck on my first day of work at my new job. The last two or three days she hasnt texted me. I dont know what to make of it. Idk if it’s because she’s dating this other person or because she gave up trying to get a response from me.
I guess im scared that NC will do more harm than good in terms of getting her back. I know I have to take care of me and ive accepted that shes dating. I have newfound hope of a fture with her but I understand that we may never be together. I get both sides to NC.
Yes NC will absolutely work if she is dating somebody new because it is a rebound. A great way for her to end up missing you is a rebound because she is basically trying to find you in a new guy, this rebound. When she realizes he isn’t you she will miss you even more. So I would not worry too much, yeah she may be a little less apt to text you early on but trust me she will absolutely be thinking of you. Kevin wrote about it in this article.
On the whole NC thing as a whole, if she is texting you constantly, feel free to respond casually once in a while. Do not be overeager, give it time between your texts to her and always try to end the conversation on your terms. She wants to talk to you, if you do that then she will be eager to text you even more.
Here is also where her rebound may help you get her back. See what would you think if a girl you were dating was texting her ex? You’d be jealous and threatened and that’s what he will feel too. Now here is the kicker he won’t have the sense to disguise the jealousy. Jealousy is only cute in small doses with a person you are head over heels with, a new relationship with an okay guy is going to take a serious hit. The more eager she is to text you and the more distracted she gets, the worse he will react, which will lead to fights between them. Just remember its a fragile relationship like a house of cards, one strong push is all it will take to topple it.
So in conclusion, do not worry too much about the rebound, as much as possible anyways, feel free to text back after she reaches out a few times and always try to end things on your terms. Good luck!
Quick question. We have been broken up for about seven months. Tried to reconcile several times. But it was too soon. She had a rebound when she was barely out of the relationship. The rebound was actually part of why she was hesitant to get back to me. The different person she is dating now is a rebound too? Even after all this time?
My ex and I parted a month ago. She told me she loves me as more than a friend but doesn’t see us working right now.
Yes he’s a rebound too. She’s still looking for what she had with you in someone else. That won’t work though. If she was done with you, she would be DONE with you. Trust me. She’s still reaching out because she wants you to hold on a little longer for her. Don’t contact her. The more space you give her, the faster she’ll realize this guy isn’t for her. I’m going through something similar. Its hard watching the love of your life with someone else. You have to keep the future in mind.
She posted this poem to her status. It has me sad and panicked. Shes obviously feeling losing us isnt a loss but a blessing. I should give up. She hasnt contacted me since the 7th of dec.
In Pursuit Of Happiness
In the pursuit of happiness, … I have crossed many bridges… Climbed many mountains & traveled many roads; Some very smooth… some very bumpy… I have run very fast… sometimes very slow… But, nevertheless, I have learned my lessons… I have learned the hard & painful way… That not all dreams come true… Happiness becomes a matter. of the mind and the heart… Now I cry without tears… & try to mend my broken heart… Now I realize… that where there is an ending… There is a new beginning… & what I thought was a loss… turned out to be… a blessing from the sky…
Lol she did that so you would reach out to her. She wants you to believe she’s happy. She’s not. The 7th isn’t that long ago. My ex hasn’t reached out to me in 2 weeks I was initiating everything. Its easy to give others advice and not follow your own, and its also hard to figure out the opposite sex. As a woman, I’m telling you, she’s not over you. Keep focusing on you, I garauntee in a week or less she’ll contact you wondering why you havent contacted her, and if you’ve moved on.
She has her own intention
Dont worry. Just keep improve yourself. Keep yourself interesting. Be awesome. She will come to u no matter as what. If she very soft, then slowly she will fall for u
Hey guys. My topic in not in any way connected to a rebound but the comments of the people here seem very helpful. That’s why I would like to seek help as well. Because now, I really feel like dying.
It’s been exactly 12 days since we broke up. We’ve been together for 7 years. But during the last few weeks before she broke up with me, I noticed she was becoming colder, she would not hold my hand, or even kiss me.
We’ve been through constant fights, big and small during those times.
Fast forward a bit, she broke up with me because she said that she doesn’t love me anymore. That the feeling completely disappeared because our relationship was just about fights, which made her fed up and eventually lost all feelings for me.
She told me that if I wanted to change, I should do it for myself. She even told me that it’s okay if I find someone new and hoped that it would be okay for me if she finds someone new as well.
How would you weigh this situation guys? Specially gals. I do not want to believe that she is really over me. But from the way she talks. I think she really is.
We’ve been on limit contact, which is kind of new to her because before I was not like this. I showed her I was “okay”, but would not text her, so basically she was the one texting me first. She would text and laugh over her own mistakes (I think somehow she knows I find her funny whenever she sings the lyrics wrong), and would tell me that I look like the fat guy dancing.
Everything was I THINK going fine, small hints here and there, until I screwed up today. We were together yesterday and I found out that she was exchanging messages with a guy that I was jealous over (although she’s not into him and he’s not into her, I was just jealous over that guy) at whatsapp. I did not want to admit that I was hurt because she was with me and she was busy over the phone with that guy (They were talking about work), so when I got home I texted her: “Thanks for the company, my chest feels a little heavy.” She asked me why, and I lied that maybe it was the cough that I’ve been having for the past 2 weeks. To my surprise she replied: “Get some rest, go to sleep, and don’t stalk my whatsapp account. hahaha.”
She figured out I was checking if they were both online at the same time. I did not tell her anything that that was the one I was trying to find out, but somehow, and I don’t know how, she knew, she felt-- I don’t know!
At first I denied but finally admitted I was still jealous and was checking on her account. She just laughed over it. Did not get angry or anything. Until today, I got restless. I asked her if it was the guy she was chatting with whenever I see the both online, and asked her if she already has feelings for him.
This was her reply (she suddenly became cold after figuring out about last night and today):
“It’s clear what I told you the last time, that the feeling is gone. So please, don’t force yourself and don’t let anybody else get involved in this situation. And no, I don’t share anything special with that guy.”
I asked her if for her she feels like the feeling is really gone, that if she feels like it is never coming back. She said “Sorry, but yes.”
I felt like I really hit rock bottom during that time. I felt like she really does not want me in my life. That’s why I need someone to help me translate these gestures of her. I really hope someone would be patient enough to read my stories and help me through this one.
Thank you in advance. I just feel so depressed right now.
The last thing I texted her was: "I’m really hurt right now, I just really want to love you better, to take care of you much better, but I just can’t because you don’t love me anymore. I did not text anything after that. She did not respond either.
Same breakup situation but my ex immediately went for a rebound.
You should go NC for 30 days. Change a few things about yourself. Especially if they are things that helped cause the fights.
She loves you as more than a friend probably but she is emotionally blocked off. As is my ex. After NC, as long as you feel you can handle her dating and all that, go for false friendship.
Get into new things. Meet new people. Go out with friends. Try to remember what some of her issues with you were and improve on them.
Never make it about you. Shes hurting too. Trust. Intimacy starts with I but dont say Im hurting. Seems like a self absorbed statement. You said nice things after but people list things how they prioritize things. In many cases. I wouldn’t have responded with much either. It would end in a ‘who’s hurting more’ competition. Both of you are hurting.