Today we have texted.
Suddenly, he asked me “It has been a long time… you don’t miss me anymore, do you?”
Then I asked him why he asked that question, he replied like “Ok it seems that you did forget, I am afraid that you think too much”.
I replied: “You know I always think too much”
He said: “That means you still miss me?”
And then I replied: “I know what should I do”
WHAT DID HE MEAN BY ASKING THAT???
he wants to comeback or he just asks for fun?
More about my story:
I and my ex had been together for 2 years. We broken this January. I had tried some ways to get him back but he just said that he was not ready and he needed more time. So I decided to do No contact for 30 days. And I have done it.
During 30 days, he didn’t contact to me.
After 30 days, I texted him first, short message and he replied me. I think it is a positive reply, I can see that he cared in the message. Or at least, it wasn’t a negative reply.
However, I am really nervous now. After breaking up with me, he move on really quickly to another girl. Although this girl didn’t accept his love but he seems to keep chasing her. After 4 months, I don’t see any signs show that he did give up this girl.
It seems he thinks of you at least. Now he might be looking for an ego boost, and to make sure you are still there s he can just keep doing what he has been doing and not worry about you
Yeah this guy is just looking for an ego boost and not seriously considering getting back together. As soon as you say you miss him and his ego is fed, he’s off to chase some other girl. Don’t answer his text next time. This will make him wonder if you are with another guy and having fun with a new man. Then he will be more likely to text you and think of you.
I agree with the above statements. Don’t give in, and refrain from texting. If he is serious about speaking with you, he will reach out again.
Thanks for your advices. But I am still confused.
My ex is a headstrong person. Because he was the person who wanted to break up first so he has to stick with his decision. I don’t think he will start the conversation first. If I don’t text him, it seems like he has forgotten me completely.
I don’t know what’s on his mind, whether he still loves me, or not. If I have chance to talk to him or to break the ice between us, I don’t want to miss it. After such a long time without contacting, he thought I had moved on. I don’t want him to think that “It’s ok, she moved on”, I want him to want me back. Is it ok to make him feel like I am still here although I still behave like I don’t care?
Hi Agnod…Nope. It’s not okay. You have to disappear from his life and not contact your ex. If he’s still in love, he will initiate contact and it will be impossible to forget you. If you do answer his texts, it just feeds his ego and tells him that you are still there waiting for him. So he has all the time in the world to be single because he knows you are waiting for him and would take him back in an instant. By not replying to his texts, you are forcing him to wonder what the hell you are up to and more importantly have you moved on with another guy. And those thoughts in his head will build until his heart makes him contact you. It may seem like he has forgotten you but trust me, he hasn’t. Let him break the ice. Even if he’s stubborn, eventually he will. If the two of you are meant to be together, he will come back.
Hi,
I am really confused now. I did almost everything. I did full no contact for 30 days, then I contacted him via text message even phone call on his birthday. I am always the person who text first but he messages he replied, I think they were positive. He asked how about my lives, studying, whether I was tired after school. Everything seems really positive in my eyes and I can feel that our story is getting better and better slowly. However, all of my friends, they said that he is just trying to be nice. He knows that I am still in love and he doesn’t want to hurt me. Positive reply doesn’t mean that he has a special feeling for me. Why do all of them only look at the negative side? Some people said that I shouldn’t contact him anymore. Let he be the one who contact first. But I know him, he will never contact first. I want him so I have to do something. I can’t wait for him doing that.
What should I do now? Please help me. Thank you.
I think its better not to contact again for a while. Dont give any timlines to yourself for now…if you say another 30 days, it sounds really long !
I would wait until he calls me rather that just text… That comes to show that he really wants to reach you…
“But I know him, he will never contact first. I want him so I have to do something. I can’t wait for him doing that.”
The truth is that the most stubborn guy in the world will make contact because his heart would make him do it if he’s still in love. Saying that you think he’s too stubborn or that you can’t wait for him to do that is your fear talking. You think that if you want him, you need to do something? No a guy is naturally the chaser and goes after what he wants-regardless of how stubborn he is after a breakup. If he really really wanted you, he’d contact you again. You should definitely do NC and ignore the fear running through your mind which probably is telling you that if you don’t do something, you will lose him forever. But going NC doesn’t decrease your chances in getting him back. It actually increases your chances. If you are the one always initiating contact, then of course he has to be kind and reply if the two of you didn’t end the relationship on horrible terms. You need to give him a chance to initiate contact rather than you doing it all the time. You have nothing to lose seeing as you already lost him and everything to gain.
He wanted to make sure that you have not moved on and he knew that you are in miserable condition without him and he succeeded because you told him that you do miss him and you are miserable without him.
I did the same thing when my g/f asked (How is my life without her) and I said it is not that good without you.
So it means nothing…he is confident of his decision and he thinks he made the right decision to break up with you.
Do NC (There is no law of 30 days ) sometimes it takes more time like 60/90 days also…and be confident and don’t show him your feelings,he should be back after sometime but be patient and forgiving and not talk about old relationship at all.
Good luck
I have done NC once before. It took me full 30 tired days although I always had to show on facebook to let him know that I was really ok without him. During my NC, exactly after 13 days, he shared a song on his facebook that I am sure he was talking about me. Maybe he really highly expected that I would contact a lot but the fact that I didn’t do anything make him surprised, and he said he felt tired. Our relationship before I did NC was good. It may not easy to explain to you guys but to sum up, before I started NC, we both agreed that we should have more time to think about the relationship and whenever we talked, everything was really pleased, like we were still in a relationship, and even we kissed and hugged.
Yes, at the moment I have to say that I want him more than he wants me. That’s a pity but it’s true. To him, with me maybe good and without me is still ok because he was the one who want to break up first. But to me, I really want to be with him, nothing else. That’s why I chose to fight for it.
Believe me, I am not being needy. Even my friends tell me that they don’t recognize that I’m really hurt if I don’t tell them. I am become a better version: having a part-time job, good study result, hanging out with friends a lot. I’m sure that in his eyes, I am not miserable without him, at least because I am trying to show that. So please, give me some advices about what should I do can make him be attracted? Thank you so much.