Wait or contact her?

Long story short, broke up three months ago. First month I did nc which worked out well, we began talking more over text and even over the phone on one occasion. We kissed on a night out, we were both drunk though. However there came a point when she said she felt confused, she said she wanted time and space and that she felt no different cus I hadn’t given it her. I think I rushed things and came across needy and desperate again. Two weeks ago she said she wanted time apart and maybe at some point in the future get back together, she also said she wanted to keep in contact but not all the time. Anyway I decided to go nc again, for myself and her. We haven’t spoken at all except when we bumped into each other a couple of times on a night out. The first time I said hello but kept it brief, the second time she prodded me in the back cus she thought I was ignoring her and seemed a bit upset. I just smiled and said have a good night. Now as it’s been two weeks I did hope she might have contacted me but no such luck, I don’t know whether I’m better off beginning contact again now or continuing nc and waiting for her to come to me?

Any advice appreciated!

I think you acted well-- you gave her space. Her no contacting you (as a fellow girl, this is my guess) is LIKELY* her trying to get your attention. Send her hello, have a brief conversation, if it feels right (as in, you wouldn’t feel like you were bothering her if you say this) ask her for coffee. Start rebuilding a friendship.

  • In my experience, when I don’t talk to an ex, my feelings tend to be, “If he wants to talk to me, he knows how to text. He can text me if he wants to. I’m not texting him.” But who knows? I may be a freak of nature. But it seems like a pretty classic girl move to me. Contact her.

Thank you for your advice, I messaged her. We had a short conversation, she kept her answers short and brief but pleasant. The only positive I took from it is that when I didn’t reply to one of her messages for a while she text me again which she didn’t do before. I got the feeling she seemed down or deflated, obv I could be completely wrong and reading into things. Do you think I’m right in leaving it a couple of days and messaging again? I’m unsure how to play this having messed it up last time