@ChrisLovesChris My ex is kinda person who doesnt contact even if she misses me so badly … So this is my trouble here… one day i have left her for 3 days when we were together …, she send nothing at all and when i came back she was pissed saying why u didnt contacted me … after this 2 weeks i send her a magic letter i found it by accident and i cuted the NC and sent it to her … her reaction was … did you got engaged ?!
I was like wow … it worked … i ignored her … she send me big letter saying that she never know what i am doing coz i used to do nothing and stuff like that , even she the one who told me to not work and stay with her and only studying … if u go inside my head u will be lost in confusion … XD
Good morning @JeanValins and everyone. I still feel sick this morning. It’s like what I ate last night didn’t digest and it’s just sitting there. I slept super weird again, strange dreams that I cannot remember. I can’t believe I am living this way. I have never been s unable to cope with something in my entire life. I don’t even know what to write this morning. I just feel sick and like I can’t take this anymore.
@ChrisLovesChris Dont worry coz i have felt the same … every dream i got is about her or see her with other person … its just sucks but after few u will notice that they even dont care and message u ,., even if u message them now it may hurt u and hurt them too so just wake up … do some exercises … drink something warm to make ur stomach feel better … watch something funny like ( toilet pranks ) i swear u will laugh so hard … 
hope it will make u feel better
@JeanValins I will try to watch that on my phone since my work blocks youtube. I am drinking a smoothie that I usually make in the mornings and it just feels like my stomach is closed in a fist. I can’t live with the thought of never talking to him again. I’m scared I’m going to wind up committed to a hospital
@ChrisLovesChris Dont be weak or you will never get a chance to fix anything … try warm drinks in the morning … it will make ur stomach feel better … green tea and stuff really good … you will be good dont worry … my NC will end soon so i will tell you what gonna happened so just cheer up and cheer me please lol
@JeanValins I have never had this experience where I feel like I am going to throw up from anything I put in my stomach. It is truly horrible. I keep green tea at work so I will try that. I wish I could just take tranquilizers and stay in bed all day long. I wish I didn’t have to work. I feel like everyone can see in my eyes how messed up I am. When does your NC finish?
@ChrisLovesChris Staying at home for ur situations is bad so never do that … work to be busy and dont think about the breakup … i do have that feeling whenever i eat something i just want to throw up thats how i lost my weight … so just work on ur self to be postive and be happy …, think of good things always … my Nc will end next week , i have no hope but gonna try at least
@JeanValins I am concentrating very carefully at work but it’s so difficult to get things done. Before I realize it I am staring into space. I’ve been at work for almost three hours and I haven’t gotten anything done. It’s scary. I did watch a toilet prank with the volume down and it was funny but now I am back to feeling ill. I am also exhausted because I slept for only four hours but I would almost rather be so tired than at full normal energy, that way maybe I have less capacity to have a panic attack.
I hope the completion of your NC goes well. I hope you will tell me all about it.
@ChrisLovesChris U will get better day after day it just started 
Whenever u feel ill remember lots of ppl feel the same as u do or even worst … u are strong girl and i believe you will be better soon … just have fun and try to go shoping after work or see some new stuff … try watch new comedy movies and stuff until u get tierd and sleep … think less and you will be fine
@JeanValins I’m scared because I do not feel better as each day goes by…instead I have been feeling worse. I am literally counting the minutes right now to my lunch hour so I can go to my car and cry like mad. I have come to see crying like throwing up for the heart and soul. For the first time I do not feel like shopping - and if you could see my credit card bills, that would really really shock you…lol. I don’t want to go anywhere, everywhere I go I think, last time I was here everything was “okay”, at least we were talking, even if it was a fake okay it was better than nothing! I will try to find things to distract me, and I am also taking steps to better myself and my life - I can’t bring myself to exercise right now (even though I am super fit and usually exercise at least an hour a day - I’m just not right now because I’m not eating) and I don’t want to think about hobbies, what I am referring to is deep changes, to myself, seeing a counselor, making amends with people I’ve hurt…I see how all those things are connected and I just want to make it all right…
@ChrisLovesChris Crying helps … Hot Shower help … Green Tea helps … Funny jokes helps … Reading helps … Write what inside ur heart in papers help … sitting near the window while looking to the stars at night helps … thinking of the gakaxy help … Watch Funny stuff helps … Walking around helps … talking to positive people help
@JeanValins all the things you’ve been saying to me have been helpful…even if it doesn’t look like it and I am a pathetic mess. Just knowing someone out there is sitting there keeping me company in all this pain is a huge help. I feel a little bit better right now. I don’t want to be sick anymore…
@ChrisLovesChris Coz i felt the same and i needed someone to make me feel better … i know ur feelings i lived these moments and i want you to get over tgis pain asap and live ur life like it was i am better i forced my self to be and i can force u to be better :3 After u feel better gonna tell you how i felt backthere … for now push ur self to be in the top … you should love ur self
Not sugar coating anything but you will ache. And it may be for sometime but just keep yourself busy. Take a walk, go for a run, learn a new skill or language, take up a new hobby. Do something that calls for your entire focus. You will eventually start to feel less and less sad. Trust me, when I got my heart broken by my ex of nearly 4 years, it was so hard. We had to do no contact because i had to stick a restraining order on him. The NC felt like he was dead. Complete cut and dry. The days seemed so hazzy and nights were just a daze of lonliness. I kept myself going by reconnecting with old friends and getting closer to new friends. I dove myself into school just to keep my mind from wandering. Time eventually began to heal me as did accomplishing little goals I set up for myself.
@JeanValins I will try, but I know I’m going to need loads of help. At lunch today I was looking up support group meetings, someone recommended I go and I agree it would be a good idea.
@LilyMoon If you don’t mind my asking, how did it happen that you had your heart broken but your ex was the one who wound up with a restraining order? I feel like the only one in this equation who would have the capacity to end up with one of those is me…
@ChrisLovesChris i always post sad stuff and its really annoying me ,., i wanna change this thing
@JeanValins did you look up Sam’s speech to Frodo on youtube like Merchaunt suggested? I did… it made me cry, but it does also make me feel stronger and braver.
My work day is almost over…thank god. To top it off work has been hell, we don’t have enough people working here and I typically have a LOT of work…but it was never a problem because I was so fast and efficient. Now that I am barely hanging on to my mind, I am so overwhelmed…I have started making mistakes here and there, not typical for me…
@ChrisLovesChris hmmm no i didnt see it … i might do that later , i just came back from shoping and tomorrow i have long day to do lots of stuff arrrgggghhh i have bought some games today but i wanna buy some clothes as well … non of my friends are interested to go shoping with me lol i feel bored
@JeanValins I just watched it again…it really is a wonderful speech, very uplifting. Maybe I will watch all the Lord of the Rings movies now. That will take up a lot of time. I’ve never really watched them all properly. My mom was just commenting that my face looks very different, very strange… I unfortunately am one of those people who you can see the sadness in my eyes very much. I think everyone everywhere has been seeing it. The good part I guess is that I am too depressed to even care. I’m glad she is cooking tonight.
@ChrisLovesChris I felt ill yesterday … i went to kitchen to cook the dinner suddenly she came to my mind … i remembered when i asked her to cook for me and she said she dont know if i am gonna like it or not , i left the kitchen I want to watch football match and some random movies and start feeling much better … i felt the feeling of throwing up but i forced my self to eat … I’ve been telling my self she wont back to me just to have no hope and work for my self , but the truth is whenever a little thing remind me of her i just lose my mind ,…
Thats why i hate being in love …