Can you reply to me please? 
https://www.forum.exbackpermanently.com/boards/topic/is-it-ever-really-over/page/5/
Sorry Samuel, i was out shopping lol. Trying to keep doing little menial jobs to keep me busy you know how it is lol. I was so paranoid though I may have driven past his house. Stupid i know cause that doesn’t help me. But it was just his car in the drive way :). But it still doesn’t make me feel any better. Like I know it hasn’t even been a week since he’s left me but he hasn’t even contacted me. Last time he messaged to check up on me which was nice but this time its the opposite making me wonder if it is over. I’ll respond now
If he gave you a chance before, there is still a chance… He thought enough about it then to give it a shot… Unfortunately, if he’s not a complete idiot, the things you did to get him back the first time may be all too familiar to him…
As far as social media is concerned, I did the same thing… As soon as we decided to split, I un-friended Her and Her Family it wasn’t because I was mad, but it was because I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing things (Life) that I was missing out on… I really didn’t have a family growing up, but they took me in for the last 6yrs and made me part of their’s.
When we split, we kept it really low key… There are friends of ours that still ask us individually how the other is doing, we didn’t want to post our business all over social media. The close friends of ours that do know, are sad… they expected us to be together forever…
As far as Tinder is concerned… He’s more than likely trying to expedite the “process” of moving on… even though we all know by what we have read that it will be a short term fix…
Thanks @JAM818, he is smart man and this is his 3rd relationship but first one that he broke off. I feel like there’s no hope as he hasn’t contacted me to even see how I am and so on. I also feel like he ended the relationship this time around too quickly without giving it a real chance and they has greatly disappointed me, especially after 2 weeks before we broke up we booked flights to hawaii indicating he was thinking about the future with me. He does have a few stresses such as joining the police force and he is slowly moving forward in the right direction to getting there however I was always there by his side supporting him so I don’t know if that could have played a factor though. He is 30 years old and only now just getting his career started. A couple of his really good friends also don’t like me which won’t help my situation will it.
Unlike you we don’t really have any close mutual friends. I could say some of his friends are aquitences of mine. Some of the things you say make me feel like this really isn’t going to wrk out in my favour again. Which i guess i will have to be ok with, its just hard when we had all these future plans right up until we broke up and now they all have to be cancelled.
Stay busy, become better and give both of you some time off for 30 days everything will be alright!
Yeah, it sucks… You see everybody on here just trying to get one “Shot” at fixing things with their significant other, it has to be even more disheartening to hope for a third chance… 
Stay positive, don’t let him see you down… Find a girlfriend that wants to go to Hawaii with you, change the name on the ticket and tear it up!! Take a ton of pictures and post that ish all over Facebook!!
Yeah while i do feel like i’m to blame mostly, I think there is more we could have done and he could have done really. Like the moving back in again was silly but he didn’t have many other options at that point in time. I just feel dumb and hopeless.
I think he will have to contact me before then though if i don’t contact him, as he may have to move out of the house we shared if he can’t get a roommate cause he can’t afford it. I remembered after I left there were a few things I left behind which i just forgot cause i was in a hurry to get out. But i doubt that will mean much hey.
He might be cheking em out every day! But he will contact you soon im sure!
hey there, I’m having a really bad afternoon right now. I haven’t been able to get up and actually do anything important like my studies. I started crying for the first time in 3 days because I’m just feeling so down and lonely without him and without any contact from him.I just feel really worthless :/.
I feel ya… I travel a lot for work, when I’m usually out of town I never really felt lonely… Because I knew she was at home and I looked forward to seeing her when I got back… Last night sitting in my hotel room I never felt more distraught, because I know that when I fly back she will not be there… We did exchange texts lastnight, she’s currently living with her sister, but mentioned that they are looking for a bigger place, which makes me feel like her “Future” doesn’t include us, or even the hope for us… How is it that every crappy relationship she’s had before, these guys get 2,3,4 chances… And fail, I’m just asking for one… I’ve been doing really good, lastnight was a set-back though… In texting lastnight, she knows I’m not home… I have a feeling when I get back tomorrow, more… If not all of her things that are still at our place will be gone…
@JAM818 at least you’re out and about getting busy. I’m jealous of your jetsetter american lifestyle lol. I’m from Australia and love America so much. And hey man at least your ex is communicating with you you’re doing better than me. I haven’t heard a peep :(. Oh so you guys used to live together also ? That is hard. Especially when you’re coming back to an empty house. I had to pack all my things in an empty house as he didn’t want to be there to support me or watch me pack my things, i was very hurt. If she’s given guys chances in the past and its failed it may make it harder for her to come to you, though theres no saying she won’t. Its probably similar to my ex though, chances in the past haven’t worked out so why should they put their heart out their agagin. Thats how I feel with my ex and I’m positive thats what he’s doing :(. But maybe your ex just needs more time as she may have jumped back into those relationships too quickly in the past and they didn’t work out so she doesn’t want to do that this time.
Still no word from my ex. Keep getting sadder as time goes on though :(. Today has been terrible weather here all rainy and depressing. I fell asleep today cause I’m in a bad funk and woke up crying :/. I just don’t know what to do. I sent my ex some money to cover the bills of the house we shared together and haven’t heard anything even after that. Quite disappointing. Despite everything I’m still trying to help him out. He’s kept one of my friends on social media (a girlfriend of mine who lived with us 3 weeks up until we broke up temporarily as she needed space from her partner) he however tried to interfere in our friendship as she left and told her how I said I was jealous and didn’t trust the two of them together. I in a way did imply this to my ex, however I was angry and made something up to get to him. It was in no way an attack on her cause if I did have a problem I would have gone to her as I’m very straight up. She however is the only friend he kept of mine on his fb and I’m not too sure why. I thought I almost lost a friend in her cause of what he told her but we talked it out and are still friends. I have no idea why he did what i did. Especially as during this time I need my friends more than ever. any thoughts ?
I did the same thing as your ex though, when I infriended her family, I kept “one” of her family members, her uncle, as a friend… I guess it’s because I still somewhat wanted that connection to her, albeit indirectly… Which may be what he is doing as well?
My jet set lifestyle is a lot of my problem though, being gone for some weeks really isn’t condicive to a healthy relationship… I was in Las Vegas for a meeting and came home to see most of her things were gone. We moved in together after about 5months(Not planned) of dating, she lost her job due to her position being eliminated… She went to school and did not have to work for the past 4.5Yrs.
We moved to New York and that’s when things went bad, I was wrapped up in the Job more than ever before, trying to get this new position and we drifted apart in every way possible. We moved back home “Colorado” and I got the new position, where I actually have more time to spend with her… Only problem is… There is no her…
We both brought a kid into the relationship my 15yr old daughter and her 8yr old son, So… Now we are both single parents… The kids miss each other, but they have not seen each other for a couple of months now… We both love each other’s kids, when we ran into each other night… She wanted me to tell my daughter that she misses and loves her, she started to cry a little when she said it and when I text her lastnight I asked about her son and when he started soccer…
@Jam818 your kid will be your supper power! The kids want to see each other and this will create oppertunities to see each other
@Nattycatty1 NC is not easy but you need to stay strong! Dont expect nothing from your ex and live your life improve yourself for you! Feel better about yourself
@nattycatty1 to answer your post on my page: the letter made her angry because she thought i was trying to brake her new relationship up! It got her so overwelmed that she even met up with a friend of mine to talk about it!
Unfortunately, I’ve tried to set something up for her son to come stay the night and hang out, but there was no response…
I get it though… If we aren’t going to work it out, then why subject the kids to that? However it just adds another layer of finality to our situation in my mind, which doesn’t help my outlook as to getting back together…
@Jam818 your mind set is and always will be your secret weapon! If one believes he can succeed he will! Times are hard for everyone on this website but we all fight for what is right self respect, love and peace of mind! I’ll be straight up you guys have a great chance at getting back together you were together a long time and your kids love each other! You could say your daughter really wants to see her again! But give her a call where your daughter is the one talking then revert it to you create attraction!
As long as you dont give up not all hope is lost
My ex IM’d my daughter about a week ago (before I ran into her) to share a clip with her and ask her how she was doing. My daughter didn’t respond, because she is upset as well about everything…
I know that “Hope” is a big driver on these boards, I try to stay positive everyday especially in front of her…
Communication was a big factor in our separation, given the fact that I was away from home so much… So, I’ve been struggling with NC I want her to know that I have changed… If I do NC, then it will be just like it was before, where I was ignoring her and not talking to her, which I feel which just reaffirm her decision to leave…
NC is mainly for you! To make you better and stronger! Once that is achieved you re-initiare contact
Yeah but my ex almost caused me to lose this friend because he decided to tell her what I had said to him to be hurtful to him. It was in no way a dig at her, yet he told her and rightfully so she was so angry. And yet he kept her as a friend. I don’t understand why he would try to do that to me.
I also don’t expect anything of my ex its just very disappointing and hurtful to realise that maybe he really didn’t ever care as much as he said he did. He was the one that said I love you to me within our first week of dating. And now he doesn’t love me and can’t bear to be there as I’m going through a very difficult time in my life.
JAM818 that sucks about her moving out while you were away. Kind of a low way to act when you opened your heart and your home to her. However I do agree that for now don’t involve the kids as both your priorities above each other are your children and their emotional well-being and getting them involved in this might just hurt them more.
Guys every day I do no contact and I still hear nothing gives me less and less hope. I sent him some money the other day to help out with bills for the house we had together. I didn’t have to do that given I had to move out 2 days after he ended it and wouldn’t even be in the house to support me or watch me pack my things. I’m trying to make things as easy as possible on him to help him out. He obviously doesn’t want to lead me on like last time where he was continuously messaging me and giving me crumbs about how we might be together again and just changing his mind. He knew that hurt me last time so thats another factor working against us as well
Just be patient and hold on thats all i got to say