Officially one month since NC

Tomorrow, May 5, will be my official monthiversary of NC.
Am I supposed to celebrate? Who knows.

Last, he sent a text saying he was going out-of-town for business. He even sent texts saying he was in my neighbourhood before he went out-of-town. Never replied to any of those.

The other woman whom is involved with him, has a FB pic up of some random drawn woman crying in the sheets saying “I can’t sleep, you’re so far away from me.”

He should be returning back in town either today or tomorrow.

In my experience, after surveying everything between us, he has been controlling and selfish, manipulative if you will, to get his way. Now, I’ve been trying to figure out how to come to talk to him about his behaviour. I guess this can only be revealed in time, but not when I am starting to talk with him again.

I’m writing this post just to tell you all that I made my 1-month mark. :slight_smile:
Could I go for 2 months? Perhaps. He may be handsome and can be loving, but the other side of him that’s a manipulative emotional controller, disturbs me. It makes me wonder if I’d ever want to put effort to making his way back to me. The fact he’s still involved with this other woman, also holds me back.

We fell into this odd routine of myself being the “weekday text gf”, when she gets to sleep in his bed during weekends. This is how it was before I went to NC, after the failed attempts of NC in the past.

As I re-connect with him, I need to change the game, all of this.

Congrats on making it to one month! Are you going to text him or will you wait until he contacts you and respond?

Thanks Mr anderson! Not sure still… he cheated on me, so I’m wondering. I was reading another ex-recovery type site, which said in the case of a cheater, up it to 45 days, at least. Maybe I’ll keep going to the 45 mark.

In either case of who makes contact, I want to have control. Letting him have control was emotionally draining before. I was a wreck. Now its my turn to be bold.

I still haven’t contacted him, and it seems he has stopped sending me texts since Friday (6 days ago).

I’m in trouble because I still miss a lot of the loving about him, yet I still feel so damaged by the pain of not only his desire to cheat, but his emotional manipulative behaviour. I still think, “How could he have done this to me?”.

Perhaps my big problem is that I haven’t yet dated anyone else this whole time. I’ve been absorbed in my own sorrows, angry, hurt and trying to get through work at the same time, which, I feel has been less productive.

Maybe I’m having just one of those days.

I know I need to love me first. Saying it is one thing… living it is another.

That’s amazing, congratulations!

I’m finding the idea of dating the hardest bit, but I’m only 3 days in.

Imo, I think you should go on a date, see how someone could & should date you, not a cheat. Why shouldn’t you demand some control & appreciation? :wink:

Thanks Glamazon. :slight_smile:
Yup, I need control and appreciation for myself.
Looks like a need to date.

Good for you !!! Be proud I know how a month of NC can be painful. I think you should keep going a Little bit longer, I’m pretty sure he stopped message you to make you wonder.

Btw what is the other ex recovery site that told you about 45 days of NC ?

Thanks wanthimback, so many mixed emotions, for sure.
The ex recovery site is exboyfriendrecovery dot com. (I’m not sure if this site has problems with having competition or links of other “get your ex back” sites.)