I’ll try and make this long story short! I’m in Canada but 6 months ago I met a guy in Australia online (not from a dating site but from playing online games together). We started chatting, then he began calling me from Australia, and then we began Skyping almost every day. He was totally gaga about me and we began making plans for him to come visit me here in Canada in January (this month).
He said that I was the woman of his dreams and he just “knew” that once we met everything would fall into place and we would eventually get married. I wasn’t so sure, but went with it. He said he’d even be willing to move to Canada to be with me if things worked out. Back in October he developed some serious, but treatable health problems. I was very supportive throughout the ordeal. He began to lose his enthusiasm and energy for our relationship and spent less time chatting with and Skyping me. By early November, another problem happened in his life; the house that he owned was being foreclosed upon and he had to move out. He moved into a friend’s house (female, but platonic).
Everything was normal between us, but distant as well. He messaged me a couple of times the week he was moving and said we would Skype later that weekend. Then suddenly I stopped hearing from him. I did not hear from him for 2 weeks. I later found out that he had signed up to an online dating site and didn’t even tell me!!! And that he was already dating local Australian women from the site before “officially” breaking up with me! WTF! Then he messages me and is mad that I didn’t contact him for 2 weeks. I asked him if he wanted me in his life or not and he didn’t answer.
All he said was “I want my health.” Early December we exchanged a few messages. He was having surgery and I wished him well for his surgery. He messaged me when he was back from the hospital to let me know the surgery had gone well. I wished him a good recovery. His last message to me was “Thank-you Xxx” That was 5 weeks ago and I haven’t heard from him since. I have also been in no contact during that time so have not contacted him at all.
I am so hurt that a) he obviously wanted to break up but didn’t have the guts to tell me he was trying to meet local Australian women b) I don’t even know why we broke up because he never officially broke up with me or even talked about why he wanted to see other people. And C) A couple of weeks ago he took down his online dating profile; I can only conclude this means he is now dating someone exclusively. This is the same man that wanted to visit me in Canada and possibly spend the rest of his life with me. And I still don’t know why he fell out of love with me
It kills me that we were in this hot and heavy long distance relationship for 4 months and he doesn’t even want to meet me anymore, but would rather meet a complete stranger off the internet and go on a date with her. Yet the woman that he loved (me), he no longer wants to meet in person?!? Makes no sense. I had even offered to visit him in Australia if he couldn’t come here and he was very keen at the time.
I feel like I’m going crazy with so many unanswered questions about why he lost interest in our relationship. We never had a single break-up conversation…we both just knew it was over when we hadn’t been in touch for several weeks.
So now it’s 5 weeks of no contact, and my question is, do I even bother contacting him, knowing that he’s dating someone else? (Didn’t take him long to get “back in the game” did it? I wish he would have just talked to me if he was unhappy with our relationship…then we could have had a chance to fix things. And if I do contact him, what do I say?
Thanks for any advice! Male or female advice both welcome