hes trying to talk to me about what to put on the papers for government help so they can coincide with his stupid divorce papers, I dont know what to do anymore. I miss him a lot and he still wants his divorce. I should write you the texts he sent me, ugh, i love him and want him back but cant his heart is into turning those papers in. do you think the first letter would help, I dont think it would. and I wrote a second letter that was friendly but I couldnt give it to him either, all I know is that hes turning in those divorce papers. and I cant stop him. also he stop loving me already. 
I have no hope anymore its because of what hes said
I already said I think you should give him the first letter but i also cant stress enough how much you really need to make an effort to show yourself from the best side possible towards him. If you dont, then he will go through with that divorce. The last thing he wants to deal with is you complaining and being difficult.
so give him the letter and talk to him about what he thinks I should put? I still think hes gonna go through with it either way.
He might do but then you’ve tried and then you wont have any regrets. What do you mean “thinks he should put” … I just dont understand why he hasnt alreadu given in the papers…
I dont know why either, I dont know what hes waiting for, it just makes it harder on me, he wants to turn them in but hasnt he may turn them in sometime this week, regardless im not signing them the judge would have to do it. So i’ll talk to him and see what he says then go from there, I should do 30 more days of no contact with him, atm I need this help for food, but if I give him the letter he could try to use it in court but I never admitted fault and said I wanted to try to reconcile being friends ect. so if I give him the letter after talking to him about the stupid money crap issues, should I go no contact and no seeing him at all for 30 days even though hes turning in those papers?
I dont know what you should do to be honest. I know that as long as you cant control yourself in front of him you shouldnt see him or talk to him. If you want to give him the letter then give it to him, if you dont, then dont give it to him. If you feel like a court can use it against you then you probably shouldnt give it to him.
wow im more confused now then I was to start out with. even if i give him the letter I see no way how he can use it against me as it actually says i still want him, lol and he wants out. idk what to do anymore, i guess im that case that lost. i hate this.i cant have him back, and even if i do the friend letter hell still file. i think for now im gonna try to talk to him on the phone about the stupid paper even though i dont want to. try to solve that stupid problem. then i dont know if to give him any letter or which one to give him.
i hate what im going through this isnt fair at all,im gonna try to figure this thing out, im gonna try to figure the money thing out give him the letter and go no contact for hopefully 30 days, he doesnt want me anymore so i should at least have my closure, even though I dont want this. do you know if relationship rewind really works?
I already talk to him on the phone about the info, he typed it up in the computer, so thats done with and hes also printing me proof of insurance. he notice my voice and asked why I was crying, I didnt say anything to him but that I was fine, before he hung up he said everything will be fine, he wants the divorce, and I want him. idk what to do. im gonna give himthe letter but im not expecting himto change his mine or anything, ill take it as a closure thing with me trying, i wanna tell himto stop, i feel like taking a bunch of pills.
so here it goes: this is what happened. I ended up calling my husband, (i know) and things just seem to get worse and worse, I was at a very depressed episode and well I had to do it, he of course told me that he was still getting the divorce, i kinda already knew it was heading that way and so I told him that I didnt matter anymore and he was trying to “console” me and I got to a very depressive episode where I told him I was gonna take a lot of pills, he at one point said he didnt care. anyways after talking to him and hanging up and talking again I left and when I came back his mom had told me he called and said he was very worried and that he was gonna call those people when people wannaI wanted to let him know about the letter I worte to him and he accused me of going in his car when i wasnt, of course I was trying to put it in but couldnt so I left it on his front shield, and he said whatever to me when I asked about the kids and told me about me telling him to keep them over there ect. he went on to telling me I was seeking for attention when thats not true. well he said he was gonna bring them over. So I left before he came. Im gonna start doing no contact again and if he was to call or text me I wouldnt know because I accidentally broke my phone. but my oldest said he was reading the letter downstairs. his mom said he took it and that she doesnt think he finished reading it. his mom said he was angry, i dont blame him, but whatever. for everything that im going through and what hes put me through it doesnt matter anymore. im for sure the letter isnt going to do anything to change his mine, but I guess I can take this as a closure, im not sure anymore, but I am going to be avoiding him for a while. what do you guys think? do you think he still loves me and misses me? at this point I hardly think any of that would matter. but would like your opinions on the matter. thanks guys for sticking by throught this with me. I will keep ya updated if anything else pops up. I went crazy and couldnt take it anymore, but it was at a lost point anyways, for now its no contact. @cassie @clear
You should do NC… And just work on yourself instead. Give him space, and give yourself space too. Work on yourself dear…
I agree with @clear. Space is the best now. Both for him and for you. No more arguments, just concentrate on yourself and your children.
he did call last night trying to talk to me,he didnt want to talk to anyone else, because he said it was private. Im not gonna let him hurt me anymore. his mom asked why I didnt talk to him and I told her im not letting him hurt me anymore. so im gonna try to avoid him at all cost. so im gonna have to come up with a plan for everything. I’ll keep ya posted.I hope nothing happens to my car because then I’ll be screwed as hes the only person I have to call. If God willing I dont but have to see him im not talking anything personal anymore. I hope not to run into him though, I cant take the pain anymore, the letter was the last straw. I’ll keep ya posted if anything.
Goodluck! Will be good for you 
I feel scared, he keeps trying to talk to me. he said its important. I need to heal, I cant take the pain anymore and he wont tell others what he wants to tell me. ugh. I really wanna do no contact so I can heal, this time around for me to heal. before I gave him the letter, he said what he said, I dont want to be hurt more then what I am already. this sucks. he may keep trying to talk to me or show up to talk to me since im trying to avoid him.idk maybe not. he told his mom that he would change the money order if I talk to him. I dont want nor need to talk to him anymore. he called again this morning because he had a call from the school, so he called to check on my youngest. at least hes caring more about the kids so thats a positive for the children. me I would do whatever it takes to avoid him and talking to him. I need healing time not more pain. and Im about to tell them to let him know this. what do ya think? btw he offer to pick up ,my oldest from school, because I have no gas money or gas in the car, but I still gotta head that direction to take my youngest to the dr. the worst thing that can happen to me would be for him to show uo at the clinic trying to talk to me, I really hope this is just my imagination, but feel he’ll do that, I hope he doesnt try to get off work early either. oh my. I just want to heal, is that too much to ask for. ugh what do ya think? @clear @cassie
so hes gonna go and get our oldest from school on his break because I have no gas or money and hes gonna bring her home. regardless I still have to take my youngest to the clinic, but oh well, Im gonna try to leave before he gets here, I dont want to see him. I cant. what do ya think?
I think you need time to heal and you need to tell him that so he’ll stop contacting you. When you see him, calmly tell him you need time and space from him to heal from all the pain.
thanks for the advise. im gonna need to do this. so I finally started talking on the phone and he kept trying to talk about needing his proof for child support. also he started saying that the letter was nice and I hung up on him. he never brought my oldest here he took her to his job and is bringing her later. im so hurt. i knew he was going to go through with it. I wish I could have bought the relationship rewind but didnt have a debt card to buy it. apparently lost him forever.
I know it’s a really difficult time for you but you are partly to blame for him not coming back to you. You cant hang up the phone on him! If he says something you dont like or if you are on the verge of crying, politely tell him that you gotta go. If you want him back you need to act like you’re on top of things. You need to act like no matter what he says or not, it wont affect you. No man wants to get back together with a woman who acts out all the time. He doesnt want you back now because he knows you’ll be fighting with him and things will end anyways. No contact will be so so so good for you! You really need to have some space for yourself- you and the children are better off without fighting all the time.
I know what your saying but what am I suppose to do. he’s still gonna file I know because he told his mom that how is he gonna have proof of him helping her with the bills here when he has to act like hes helping me pay the bills else where. I dont understand him. when I was trying to talk to m oldest he was playing games with me and not putting my oldest on the phone. they later showed up. I didnt want to see him and then went in my room as he was down stairs, then his mother insisted in him putting up my ac so he came upstairs and put it up. I didnt say anything to him as I didnt want to speak with him. and he was mad when he left (which at this point in time, why should I if he keeps hurting me) and my oldest said arent you gonna give her a kiss he said nah and left down stairs, my oldest was like what isnt she your friend you can give your friend a kiss, I know he was mad at me, but im hurt and really mad at him. he wants to continue the divorce and hasnt even turn in the papers, its driving me crazy. what should I do? I thought of calling him and apologizing for my behavior but then I started thinking whats the point. I need my time to heal as he wants out. according to my oldest I hurt him to much, but hes hurt me really bad as well and I never went for the divorce. also he asked my oldest Sunday if I’m dressing up for him, and she told him no, that I dont have any clothes, lol I said why did you say that, my oldest said because its true, lol, I said thats just my clothes I have lol. so idk anymore im very confused and hurt, I know he loves me and is very hurt and is getting the divorce which I dont think its fair, but no matter what I do its always about him and what he can get proof of for his stupid divorce. so do I have any chances left at all? idk how to go about this. im very hurt and confused. ugh.