My Ex, confusing situations and I really want her back

Hi All,

Me and my ex split up recently, we have two children together so we stay in contact for them.

We had some issues during our relationship which I take as much blame for as I need to and have done everything in my power to show that I am a different man now and how much I have changed which I think my ex see’s.

The thing that’s confusing me is that after we had split we were still spending time together and started to get closer again however a new man has entered the scene and that has obviously meant her attitude to me has changed in that respect. Now this man has changed everything about her and she is acting so differently to how she was in the past even when our relationship was good. This man is the complete and utter opposite to me and would never have been someone she would have gone near in the past.

I obviously still spend a lot of time with the children so I see her a lot. She does flaunt this new man in front of me by spending hours on her phone etc however she hides it a lot when I’m around her and when asked about it she denies it.

The thing that’s really confusing me is that she still uses me as a massive part of her life and that’s not just for the children. When I go over there she’ll suggest me staying on the sofa over the weekend, she’ll sometimes fall in to talking as if we are still together. When we’re apart she’ll contact me and not just to discuss the kids.

This new ‘relationship’ is obviously fun for her and she is prioritising that over the kids at times but you can very much tell it’s a fairytale stage thing at the moment… it’s all laughs and jokes and tagging each other in Facebook posts etc.

I don’t know if she knows it’s a rebound thing and is enjoying the attention from it but also wants to keep me close because she knows deep down we should be back together and that I am the family man that she needs in her life?

While she’s with someone else, don’t ask about him! At some point, you need to ask her if she wants to talk about what went wrong and how you two intend to fix it. Couples counseling could also be helpful.