my borderline ex

So I basically went through the whole program, and it progressed pretty much as planned. About 2 weeks ago I went to see my ex at her house one day after work, and within a couple days we were already talking and seeing each other consistently. Those past two weeks have been great and I haven’t had any problems or concerns until yesterday and today.

But before I get into that I need to drop some backstory: me and my ex were together for pretty much 2 years with one brief separation about a year ago before we split back in june, then lingered on til august before fully separating. during my no contact period I took in all the information I could find and listened to the advice of others. I also went and sought out therapy on my own because the truth is that I have my own issues to work out that directly contributed to the end of our relationship. throughout my numerous therapy sessions i found that while i do not have the full blown disorder, i very clearly fall into the spectrum of narcissistic personality disorder. This is something that i agree with and am actively doing my best to reconcile so that i can be the best partner and person i can be. Likewise, my therapist asked me a lot about my ex and without ever meeting her, informed me that she falls in the spectrum of borderline personality disorder and may even actually have a full borderline personality disorder. this was all brand new information to me and i also found that people like us are traditionally (and sometimes tragically) drawn to each. Anyway, with all that said i inevitably came to the conclusion that i do love her and was willing to put myself fully into the relationship. Emotion aside, i made a logical decision to pursue this again in hopes that we could build and maintain a loving and stable relationship that would last.

So with all that said, again i went through the whole no contact period and it basically worked, she’s back in my life, there’s “i love you’s” and so on. However yesterday she got weird and seemed to pull back from me, and today we have not spoken (i sent a text with no response but thts it). My question, and i would appreciate any advice here, is do i keep pressing on? does anyone out there have any experience with this type of situation or know someone who has? do i keep trying to contact her or just do nothing? i don’t feel the “instincts” trying to take over, yes some of those feelings are lingering but i honestly feel in control of my emotions and am over all the previous break-up pain and negative thoughts i had before.

I’ll take any response i can get, and thanks for taking the time to read.

It seems to me you really do love this woman and want her in your life. My advice to you is…don’t give up on her yet! Keep telling her and showing her that the therapy you’ve gotten has been so beneficial to you…tell her it can be for her…and ultimately for you both as a couple. Though, you can only lead a horse to water…and the thoughts of therapy or something “wrong” with them…is hard for some to think about. Thinking someone thinks you need help can be hard to accept. You’re taking the steps and trying really hard it seems …and investing whole heartedly. Try to convince her how beneficial therapy and possibly couples therapy can be…keep showing you are trying and love her…along with telling her every day just how much you do. Don’t give up yet!