Hi Kevin,
Thank you for creating such a helpful forum.
I started with my bf in December 2014. We met online and within few days, it took off. It was all lovey dovey and fairy tale affair. He wasn’t having a job when we met. Still, I was with him. I helped him financially, bought innumerable gifts without buying for myself, frantically searched for jobs for him, made his resume, created his profiles on job boards, like everything. I literally used to be left with no money. Then also, I never told him so that he doesn’t feel bad about his situation.
He never promised me of marriage but yes told me that he will talk at home and seek his parent’s approval (In India, we must seek parent’s approval before doing anything. No matter how much grown ups we are). I was never comfortable with sex before marriage. I went ahead with him because he wanted. We used to live in different cities. I went to him every time to meet him. He never came to my place. I was ok with that.
Everything was so beautiful. We did have ugly arguments but we rebound.
He got a job. Suddenly I could feel that his interest has lessened. He was nice, we still used to have long talks. But that warmth was missing. He never said I love you.
Then we had our parent’s meeting. Everything was ok until I and him had an argument over wedding arrangements. We argued. I said something which he interpreted to be something else. he never replied after that.
For 2 days, I kept calling him, msgng him, begging, pleading. He was unmoved. I was so shattered that I thought of suicide and messaged him the same. he thought I was blackmailing him. He did not reply even then.
After 2 days, I called from a new number and he picked up. we had a discussion and he threatened me and told me not to call him again. In the heat of the moment, I asked him my money back. To which, he said many bad words which a guy would never say to anyone I believe. He called a prostitute having long term goals. That I spend a lil money on guys so that I can trap them to get married.
Where I messed up: I accessed him facebook, gmail without his knowledge. he blocked me everywhere.
After 2 weeks, i again hacked his passwords and also got pizza delivered to his place, called from a new number pretending to be a different person just to listen to his voice. He threatened me that he will file a police complaint for harassing him. I have become obsessed. Now, i have created a new account on whatsapp just to see him online. I don’t know what am I doing. I am just not able to move on. It’s been 2 months since I last talked to him. Still his memories are as fresh as today. I keep on revisiting my chats with him, keep checking my phone logs when I received his last call on my number.
I know I have messed up everything to a huge extent. Still, I want him back. Please help me!