My ex boyfriend broke up with me four months ago. After a while talking sometimes, I decided to go NC because he was very distant and that was hurting me.
After those weeks we start talking again like friends, from time to time and about books, movies, tv… Sometimes he sent me things saying “it made me think about you”. We usually to have short conversations, once a week or so. Furthermore, we share a chat group with common friends so I try to show him my best side there too.
I miss the times we texted each other all day long). He is very stubborn and said that he is not in the “us” page anymore and the fact that we live in different cities (but near) isn’t helping (he hated distance due to a past experience). If we could met in person… He said that he wouldn’t mind met and go to the movies or something like that but as we barely talk, it is not possible arrange a meeting, I would be forcing things and wouldn’t work. But without seeing me, is easy for him to say that he has moved on and be distant.
I really want to make him “addicted” to talking to me like before, I need to gain him back but I don’t know how. I really miss him and I think that the key would be metting in person. With distance is easy to say “I’m over it” but if he could see me, spend a few hours woth me… I don’t want to talk about us inmediately, I just want make him remember who we were together.
The problem is that I am afraid he would say no to a meeting. Well, I asked him in february two times, even when he was being very very distant to me (telling him that I was going to his city for something else and we could met) but he gave me excuses (even though, he said thanks for telling him and asked me to tell him if I go there). A few days after that, I started NC because his coldness during those weeks was hurting me. After that, as I told above we talk about the “new stage” and since then, he uses to text me once or twice a week but with things about our favorite tv shows and movies and I guess he is a little more comfortable but it is not enough and I still don’t have the confidence to ask him to met in person.
What can I do to make him more attached to me again and create the situation for asking him to met without forcing the things? (well it would be better if was him who suggested it but it seems impossible to me). I really believe that meeting in person and experience me again, just like before (not our last dates, obviously) could move him a little.
I must say that I’ve just finished in my temporary job and I am searching for one in his city (it is the most important city of our region, above all in my field) so…well, if I got it, the distance which limited him would be over but I don’t have any yet, so for now I have to “work” with what I have, and the situation is what it is… I miss him and I think that he is holding himself back (he told me that he have done that before). How can I make him confortable with me again and open to give us another chance?
Thank you a lot