Hi guys,
I’ll try to keep this brief. For the long version of my story, see https://www.forum.exbackpermanently.com/boards/topic/considering-reconciliation/.
The short version- we were together for 7 months, incredibly happy until he out of the blue decides to break up with me for really silly reasons, then essentially after he’s already dumped me tells me that he cheated. That was 4 months ago. Since then we have done no contact for up to 3 weeks at a time, but do text occasionally. He used to initiate the texts but more recently I’ve been the only one initiating, but he responds immediately and always seems a little sad in his responses. I’m not really trying to get him back at this point, so I’m done playing the game of waiting for him to initiate a text, and I’m also not planning out my texts for days in advance. Just whenever I think of him I text him a message, like with any other person in my life. I thought I’d put our last few exchanges up here if anyone has thoughts.
On Thanksgiving:
Me: I always miss you a little bit during family gatherings, even still.
Me: Happy thanksgiving!
Him: Happy thanksgiving!
Him: I miss you every day. Today has been particularly bad.
Me: I still have days that I miss you so much I can’t even breath. [stepped it up a level since he did. and also wine ]
Me: Sorry, wine makes me say things I shouldn’t
Me Not that it makes it any less true
Him: I’m sorry. I’m a damned fool.
Last week I was packing and found a pocket knife he gave me but I lost while we were still together and we were both a little upset about it.
Me: (pic of knife)Told you I’d find it
Him: (happy emoji) and (sad emoji) all at the same time [why sad? I found the knife!]
Last night (would have been our 1 year anniversary)
Me: Hope you are doing ok, today was definitely a little bittersweet for me
Me: I’d always imagined we’d go back to (restaurant where we had our first date) tonight, return to the scene of the crime
Me: Instead I’m drinking with your ex and her boyfriend, which is also fun lol [by pure coincidence I work with his ex before me and we had our holiday party last night]
Him: It’s been rough but I’m turning it around. Congrats on the house. You’ve earned it. [I just bought a house this weekend]
Him: I think about you, us a lot. I don’t know what was wrong with me.
Him: Tell (ex-girlfriend) I say hi
Me: I will!
Me: And I still think about you a lot. Clearly.
Him: I want to tell you the whole story someday. No forgiveness, just truth.
!!! What do you guys make of all that? Every time I talk to him he seems to express a lot of regret, but regret is not the same as wanting a do-over. This wanting to tell me the whole story is the first sign of wanting to get together for a conversation (I’m pretty sure he couldn’t tell me the whole story over text). I think I’m going to tell him I would like to do that sometime, but is that a terrible idea? I’m wondering if it won’t help with closure if nothing else. I’ll text him back in a bit (all of that was last night, haven’t responded since then) and let you guys know what happens.