Tomorow it is his birthday…Do you think that is a good idea to text him to wish? What I should write???
Any help please??
Hi.
I just responded to your message about contacting him on his birthday, which I believe is today. Reading your first message has given me a much clearer view on this. He clearly had the upper hand on you in the relationship. You cared more for him than he did for you. I am sorry if this is hard to hear. I was in a relationship for 6 years back when I was a little younger. My girlfriend was very needy and clingy and I wanted some freedom back. Much to my regret I ended up cheating on her and she found out. She broke things off with me and to be honest I didnt care. I was in a position of strength and I knew she loved me more than I loved her. I could tell from her emotional reactions to this. To be honest I felt as though I could get her back anytime I wanted. What I believe your best course of action is to work on improving yourself, to try and get your life back on track with healthy friendships and have a good time. This man does care alot about you. But being cramped and given no space is not a good feeling for a man. Once you start enjoying your life again and dont need to have this man in your life (its okay to still want him). People have a 6th sense as to when woman are still available and it is not attractive. I read some very wise words once. If you drag a piece of string around in front of a cat, she will chase after it all day. But as soon as you drop the string on the floor the cat will leave it alone and become disinterested. It works the same for every living organism. We want what we cant have. Once you are enjoying your life again and are no longer completely dependent on him, he will find out. Be careful not to try and show this as we can pick up very easily on attempts at showing that a woman is over you. You really need to get yourself into a position where you no longer depend on him for happiness. Once me ex contacted me again (which was after 3 months) she was no longer dependent on me. And I fell so deeply in love with her that she ended up putting me on the back foot and I lost her from being too needy.
You are not a bad person. You are in a desperate situation. And he is not. Six years does not dissappear for anyone. My 6 year relationship ended 8 years ago and while I do not need her in my life anymore I still think and care about her. He has not forgotten. Ignore him if he acts angry. Intense anger is a strong emotion. And you can only get angry with someone you love. People react instinctively and once anger subsides the emotion will take another form. I hope this is helpful. I could write a whole book on this but I am afraid I dont have the time. If you have any specific questions for me please feel free to ask.
Any advice on my current situation would help me alot as well: https://www.forum.exbackpermanently.com/boards/topic/8-days-since-breakup-help-me-do-this-properly/
A thought just came to mind. After her period of no contact she mentioned that the new pirates of the caribbean movie had just come out on cinema. I really loved that movie and that got me talking again. Thats how she initiated contact with me. However I must stress that I think you should be in a stronger position than you are in at the moment before initiating contact. Hope this is helpful.
Thank you for your message. I just texted him ‘happy b’day’ and he didn’t even reply back to say thanks… I just cannot understand why he is so mean to me…He is behaving like he wants to hurt me more and more…
Please help!!! he texted me today that he is going to announce that we have officialy split up and everything is good…
I called him and he answer the call and I told him that he has to talk with me and not sending me txt that he will make announcements. and he told me that he haven’t got anything to say since we cannot communicate.I told him that he didn’t try to communicate with me at all, he just send me text messages. And I told him that I cannot announce that we broke up since we haven’t talk at all all this period.I asked him to come and talk with me even for the last things, he said he has nothing to tell me. Then he asked me to find a way and send him the keys from the house and I said to him whatever you want come and take it…
What do yu think? Any ideas please?
I would wait a few hours. You are in a strong position in this situation and you dont realise it. He is still clearly very emotional which means that there are feelings there. Tell him you need some space. You will arrange to send him his keys, which you should do a few days later, and then go full co contact. Do not answer his calls or respond to his texts at all. He will feed be more angry at first. Just ignore it. After a week or so he should start to cool down and might start being loving again. This may swing back and forth as his anger and love will chop and change. Be strong and speak to your family. Eventually he will start to miss you and that is when things will start changing. I am in a different timezone so it is difficult to always be available to talk. But under no circumstances try and communicate with him for now other that what I said. Tell him you agree he should tell everyone it is over and that you need some time without him anyway.
You mean to call him again after my last call? I am not sure if it is good idea… I told him that if he wants thekeys to come here and I will give them to him. I don’t want to put 3rd party btw us. It is so simple you want the keys come and take them…I don’t know what to say. It is over in his mind and for sure he hates me…
He doesnt hate you. And if he does hate you, you dont need to worry. You are a good person. You havent done anything bad to him. If you announce that it is over then you are only agreeing with him. Men are very quick to react to this. If he broke your mobile just be careful. Sometimes we find ourselves in abusive relationships. And sometimes you need to protect yourself because the person hurting you is the same person you hold onto for protection. Dont have a third party involved let him fetch the keys and ignore him. Do not contact him again or return his calls unless he really starts treating you well. You deserve to be treated well.
He texted me to go there and talk about the last details…??? I called him and I told him that I cannot go now and if he will be home the next days.He said to me no maybe on Monday we will see…
You should not have called him back. It is time that you started calling the shots and ignoring his messages. Definitely dont call him. Wait at least a few hours before responding to his texts and tell him. If he texts you about monday just ignore his text. He will probably call after a few hours. Ignore the calls. Send a text a few hours later and tell him you have decided you dont want to talk about the last details. Tell him there is nothing left to be said. This will make him start wondering.