Update
MEnding NC this week and plan to ask her for coffee tomorrow but actually get the coffee on Saturday. I feel a lot better about myself and did some other things Kevin mentioned in his email series. Still a little nervous (mostly her not replying) but I do believe I’m ready to see her again. Only thing that happened while in no contact was last week the day before her birthday she sent me a text asking how my week was going. I replied about a half hour later as I didn’t see the text right away since I was doing something at the time and sent her a text back saying it was going good and said two things I was doing that week and asked her how hers was going. She didn’t reply back. Made me a little nervous but I kept my cool. Looking forward to having a good time with her. Wish me luck.
Keep your cool. Act cool. Thats it. Email series really nailed it.
The meet up went great! We decide to get lunch instead and talked for a good 2 hours and we didn’t bring up the past at all.
Only little awkward thing that came up, she was talking about looking for a new apartment to live in and she made a little notion on what if we got a two bed apartment together and were room mates. After that she made a joke about what my parents would say and moved on from that. Other than that we had a good time talking.
Towards the end we’re talking about movies we have seen and talked about up coming movies we want to see and I made a little notion that the next time we hangout we should see a movie. She talked about a theater that might be close by that we could do that at. After that she made the notion on leaving and I walked her to her car said bye and said I hope we can hangout again soon and she gave me a big smile and said yeah.
I felt good the whole time and glad it felt that it went well. Trying to think what I should do now. I’ll be out of town next weekend but is asking her to hang out again the weekend after that too soon? Should I try texting her again in little conversations? I want to make sure my next move is right.
Well i think it is too soon. Don’t go on too over enthusiastic. Just remain cool. Why? That’s what you feel right now correct? Cool so just maintain it. Because it is your greatest weapon. Ending a day with a smile is the best way to impress her. It shows that you are still a fun person to be with. An interesting text is good but dont devote your time to her. She’s not a priority now because she is just a friend for now. And you dont want to go on being that guy who cahses again. Good for you bro. Keep that momentum up.
Thanks Nightdeleon. I guess I’m still trying to figure somethings out. I guess hanging out again in a couple weeks is too soon since Valentine’s Day is coming up and I know it’s too soon to do something romantic for her. Yeah after seeing and our meet up going well does want make me want to see her again but I know I can remain cool. My next question is how long should I wait to try and ask her to hang out again or is it now I’m waiting for her to suggest the next one? I guess I’m not sure what am I waiting to see her do next?
Why not make arrangements for a day with her. February 14 is the date. Why? Getting that day right would do you great. Plus you have lots of time to plan for it.
I thought it might be too early to do a Valentines date but you are right. I’m going to put some thought into it but I guess my only question at the moment is what is the best way to ask her out on it? I’m sure a text won’t do but would calling be better? Should I call it a date or would that make her back off and go defensive? Getting flowers a good idea? Surely not roses at this time but some other pretty colorfully ones. Only thing I know for sure that day is that she will have church that morning but I feel sure she won’t do anything else the rest of the day so I do believe I have a chance at it. Just got to make sure I don’t say something that I shouldn’t.
A simple “hey let’s go to church together” is fine dont over think the day. It’s feb 14. More than a week away. So try not to fret too much. A simple text will do. Why call? It will show neediness. Try to be calm. Flowers? Roses are good. But not red. Try other colors. Light peach or light pink. A single rose. Don’t spend too much. You are not together thus you are not obliged to give her stuff that she doesn’t own. Namely you. So don’t go too enthusiastic about valentines day. She’ll go on the defensive faster than a snap of a finger. Stay on your path bro you are doing awesome.
Thanks for helping me. Going to church sounds good. Only thing I can think of right now is she might say is the distance between us is too far. Depending on traffic we live roughly 30 to 45 minutes apart in a big city and both our churches are close to where we live.
I can see asking going to church like this, I say “hey would you like to go to church together this upcoming Sunday”, then she will probably say “I don’t know our church’s are far away”. Is it okay if I make the offer to go to hers and pick her up or just meet her at her church?
If we do church then I will plan a nice simple lunch somewhere for after church and then some kind of fun activity after that (i.e. movie, bowling or maybe shopping) and probably call it a day after that.
Our distance is the main thing I see her using to say no but I will give it some thought. I do want the day to go right if she says yes.
When dealed with meanial stuff you can handle that bro. The heavy stuff you can ask 
Your right. I have been just asking stuff and hoping you’ll tell me what to do. Yeah I’ll take care of this and make it happen I mean I got her to go out with me before right? I can do it again. Thanks agains hopefully I will make one more post about how that day goes and take care of everything after that on my own.
Had a nice very small text chat with were today. When we met last weekend she asked me how to download a game she really liked when we were together and I told her how to get it. I texted her today to see if she got it. She texted back saying not yet and had trouble getting it. I replied asking her what she tried and she replied saying she was at the doctor and would talk to me later and I said bye. Later I thought doctors visits are never fun so I sent her one text saying “I thought you could use a smile” and sent her a funny cat picture I saw. And she texted me one last time with “:)”. Felt good that the pic I sent made her smile. Going to plan Valentine’s Day this weekend. Wish me luck.
Exactly! Heres the thing. I plan out everything, it’s me who she falls in love with. Get the hang of it and you feel even better.
Guess we won’t be going out this weekend. I texted her earlier today about wanting to go to church together this weekend and she replied with
“Sorry it took so long to get back to you. I do wanna see you and talk to you. But idk how or when is good. Let me think about it and I’ll text you to see when is convenient. I’ll ttyl. Goodnight.”
I texted back saying “take the time you need” and texted me back “thanks”. It sucks but it’s okay. I’ll take care of myself for the time being.
Good answer tho. No pressure is good. You should require her
Something like. Come on it will be fun. Or something. “It’s just church”
Sorry I’m a little confused. You say it good I didn’t put pressure on her and then say I should be like its just church. Like should I be saying that to her now or just later when she contacts me back?
Its not pressure if you are not forcing her.
Positive reinforcement.
I see what you mean. I’ll try to tell her something tomorrow and see how it goes. I assume if she still asks for space to give it to her and leave her alone. I’ll update on how it goes when I try it tomorrow.
Well I tried and looks like we’re not going out tomorrow. This is the conversation we had. I sent this text around 1pm
“Hey *****. I am glad you contacted me back the other day. I know your still thinking but I am also glad to see you taking care of yourself. I do hope we can still go to church tomorrow since you know, it’s just church and I think it will be fun going together.”
At about 9pm she sent me these two
“I’m at my sisters place right now so idk if I can go to church with you.”
“And it’s might be a long drive to the Methodist church that you go to”
And I replied about 10 minutes later with these two.
“If your spending night there tonight then that’s okay we can go to church next weekend. I don’t mind making the drive to your church and I could pick you up too if my church is too far.”
“I don’t want to keep you up. Thanks for letting me know and think about maybe going to church together next weekend. Hope you and your sister are having fun together and tell her I said hi. Ttyl.”
Tried my best to not put pressure on her. Hopefully we can go to church next weekend and try the plans I had for tomorrow then.