I was in a relationship for with someone who told me every day that there life meant nothing with out me and we had an amazing relationship or so I thought… we have an 18 year difference in age and we started dating when she was 23… I’ve never loved anyone more… she had a 2 year old when we met and my kids were 7 and 9… we dated long distance for 3 years and then she and her child moved in with us… we had an amazing relationship and the kids called each other brother and sister and such… I raised her son basically… she wanted to get married forever and last spring we got engaged… I was so happy… we didn’t jump in to wedding plans right away because we were buying a new home and wanted to plan an great 30th bday party… we went to our home town for Thanksgiving last year and I opted to stay with my family while she went to hers… when we got back from Thanksgiving she told me was leaving me… fast forward to this April when she did move out… we lived apart but spoke almost everyday… she told me how much she loved me but just knew I couldn’t change what was bothering her… sadly… she never told what was bothering her before telling me she was leaving…she just kept it pent up and then it exploded… she finally let me know what was bothering and I offered to change it but she doesn’t believe I can change… she moved out 2 months ago and told me should wouldn’t date for many years or bring anyone else around her son… 3 weeks ago we were talking and she told me loved me but was so confused and maybe just needed more time… we were supposed to go to dinner as a family on a Sunday night and she canceled abruptly and then got very cold with me… turns out she was on Match.com and met a guy… she proceeded to tell me it was like walking out of the dark and into the sun when they met and calls him her soul mate after a week of dating… we spoke on the phone today for an hour about how she will never ever get back with me and she hopes the changes I’m making that would have grown our relationship are for myself and not for her… that she is never coming back to me… even if this guy doesn’t pan out, she said it would never happen with me again… she told me she is taking her new guy to meet her family after 2 weeks of dating and said not to contact anyone in her family any more and told me I can’t have a relationship with her son, whom I feel like I raised… This new soulmate looks a lot like me but is very opposite of my personality. I’m going start the NC today after our hour long talk… she told me she checked out because I wasn’t excited about getting the wedding planned, I told her I was but she is over it now…she told me loved me 3 weeks ago but today told me hasn’t loved me forever and was checked out for 6months… she also told me left becaus when we would go out, I would get too drunk sometimes and embarrass her… I am trying a path of sobriety but didn’t start that until she started this new guy…too little too late for sure… it’s like everything literally changed overnight when she met this guy… things she said she loved that I did she now tells me bothered her unbelievably…anyone been through this before? I really love her more than I can explain and never planned on being with anyone but her for the rest of my life… she was my best friend…she does not have support group up here after she moved and think she was lonely more than anything when she went on Match.com… and thus guy is filling her sadness whole…could this be her soulmate? Or just a rebound ? Feels like a rebound but our relationship started very fast as well so I’m worried I will never get her back… any thoughts? Or advice for me ? Thanks
Hello, I wanted to jump from all the story and answer whoever says they can’t live without you is lying. Also the ex who says they wont date anyone is lying, they date faster than the other. Another thing, the ex who will never return is lying. She will! It sounds like shes going through some type of crisis. Maybe you triggered that. Im not sure but just let time pass and see whats going on. Your best bet is to start No Contact for a month or two. Then see how shes doing and decide if you want to try again or do No Contact again.