So my ex and I broke up (he dumped me after he cheated saying he couldn’t be in a relationship), I followed no contact, followed the plan and everything was going well. We had moved from texting to him really wanting to see me. Yay right? So I go meet with him and am cool and relaxed and by the end he hugs me, kisses me, tells me he misses me. I say let’s just go no pressure see where this goes and he says ok. I say we are not just friends and we kiss goodnight and I leave.
We continued texting back and forth. Keep in mind we were texting like when together. He was initiating most of it. In 18 days we sent over 700 texts back and forth. I said I would like to see him again. He set a date and time, stuck to it, bought more than one bottle of my favorite wine, and we hung out by the fire pit. We ended up cuddling with him leaning his head on mine.
Suddenly, he says that my saying we weren’t just friends sent his head spinning all week. I asked if he still felt like he wanted to be just friends and he said he thinks so. He said he doesn’t know how much of this is fear of a relationship but he also said he doesn’t want me the way I want him to. I said after the last time we met and he treated me as clearly more than friends, that doesn’t work for me. He left, didn’t talk for a few days.
Last night I get a message from him that says “I have been thinking about this a lot. I agree we need some time apart. I need to be friends without crossing boundaries and I need time to do that.”
I didn’t respond. I had decided to go no contact anyway. But seriously what the hell. You basically admit that you have feelings for me beyond friends but need time to get over them?
Currently I am sticking to no contact. I did remove him from my social media but my instagram is public and I know he will be watching especially since when we started talking again he watched and liked almost every single post or story I put up. I mean even a pic of a rosebush over 24 hours after I had posted it.
What do you do when your ex has decided he would rather suppress his feelings than give in to them? I might possibly want him back, if he got his shit together, but other than no contact and doing my thing, is there any other step I should do? Or just wait it out and if it happens it happens. Am I wrong to think it is crazy that if we both have feelings for each other and the only problem is his commitment fear that seems like a ridiculous reason to call it quits?