I’m sorry things are so painful. Love causes to much happiness and so much pain.
You seem to have done everything right so far. I would guess it will continue to be painful but you will do what is right for yourself going forward. Working on making yourself happy and yourself better is great. I wouldn’t suggest contacting him. I would wait for him to contact you and then make a decision of what you want to do then. Continue to work on making things better for yourself, you’ve done a great job so far.
thank you it felt good your words. yes it is painful I am strong. what happened was that maybe I made my first mistake I gathered all of his things what he left at my apartment and I asked him what does he want with them. he replied by saying that he still in the countryside but will be in the same city as me next week and will come and get it. he also asked if it urgent. I replied that it is okey then this morning he sent me a thank you. so next week we will meet. I am aware that it will be painful to see him as I am 100 % sure he does not want to get back together and I might but I will be strong and try not show any emotion. and hopefully after that it will not hurt as much. I also do not want to overthink it, why he is coming personally as when he left he sent his friend, why he contacted me if he still works. and the main question which I might not get answer what is his goal. painful but it works for the long run. Thank you again