Hi, I’m 36m and I broke up abruptly with my ex 27f of 2 years. To continue, I served nearly 10 years in the military and was in a dark place for a long time. I met her when I was stationed in the UK back in 2022 and i broke up with her in November of 24. Fell in love with her kid who had no father figure who asked if she could call me dad. It hurts because i hurt them both when i left with no explanation because she is the woman i want to spent my life with and the daughter i have always wanted because i can’t have kids due to having testicular cancer back in 2017. I broke up with her abruptly because i almost took my own life in November of 2024 (we were currently planning our next trip together since we were long distance.) I was not in a good place, but she was always on my mind as i was getting the help i needed. I’ve been in therapy and outpatient hospitals for over a month following and reached out to her in 8 months to rekindle what we lost. I called her and she told me she started seeing someone officially in September. I wrote her a heartfelt letter (i know i shouldn’t have) saying she was the light that helped me get out of my dark place and she was, but knowing she is in a new relationship hurt more than anything. After my heartfelt message, she mentioned she could still see a future with us when i asked, but it wasn’t fair because she has a new boyfriend and mentioned it took a long time for her to move on from me. Days later we talked again and she was cold, mentioned she feels more fulfilled now in her relationship (tough because we were physically together for 1 year and long distance for another) and also mentioned that what she said about seeing a future was a mistake and didn’t mean to come off as still seeing a future because she is with a new man. Hurt more than i could imagine. I told her i loved, liked i loved her before and that she was what was missing in my life and i didn’t realize until it was too late. She said she couldn’t answer when i asked if she still loved me. I said i loved her and i guess this is goodbye and she mentioned that i could always reach out to her if i wanted to talk. Is this the end? I’ve been working on myself and almost out of the military now due to military related issues, depression being one. I’m going to school in pursuit of going to medical school, but I can’t help but miss her. Is there still a chance with her?
Is there any hope? I told her everything back in May, but when i told her i rarely heard from her. Did i scare her away for good? I haven’t spoken to her for a week as of today and i don’t plan to until i return to the UK next June, but is that too late?