Looking for abit of advice my guy broke up with me on Sunday and I haven’t slept or eaten since. Have been in such a mess and last few days I kept texting him saying how much I love him. He did say it’s taken me to break up with you to sort things out and the constant text messages from you is doing my head in & its making my decisions to end things stick more & more. So I really have stopped the texting now. Just it’s been hard as I’m sure anyone in my shoes would of done the same.
I really don’t want to loose him his been a rock to me. He said his broken up with me because of work though is stressing him out & he loves me but it’s made us less close. I have been so worried about his stress Iv told him to go to the doctors. It is a tough job he does in London. We’ve been together 6 months but we adore eachother. We never argue or anything. The last month hasn’t been great because his been so down with work when he comes to mine also I missed 2 of his family events ( same weekend ) christening & birthday party I was so gutted but I was so sick. Embarrassing I know but suffer from
Heavy periods. I messaged his mum and apologised I couldn’t make her birthday and she removed me from Facebook I believe maybe she just doesn’t want to get involved which is fair enough or my fella told her to remove me. I know it’s bad but Iv only met her once in 6 months when I saw her I wasn’t bad it seemed to get worse & worse. We kept in touch over fb as she saw I was in a state about them and I sent her some cupcakes.
I’m so upset about it and ripping my hair so much. I wouldn’t do it on purpose.
It’s got in the way on a few occasions like my friends wedding I couldn’t attend I was gutted.
Monday I ran to the doctors in a state demanding they help me with it and they put me on the pill. I text him saying I should hopefully have that issue sorted now. And he said I’m glad your getting it sorted Iv been telling you for ages. He also said you’ve shown me so much emotion in the last 12 hours then you have in 6 months I knew you had it in there though. I always told him I loved him but serious chats I would laugh off. Iv been single for 4 years due to issues and travelling. Iv been treated soo badly it takes me some time to come out my shell. Iv never felt this way about a guy before. I can’t believe how much I love him! And I know he loves me as he said he doesn’t want me to block his number but he wants me to leave him alone and give him space. However I have blocked him on all my social media accounts as it was too hard for me to see he had deleted our pictures.
I’m so scared that his going to forget me and find a stunning girl! Please help.
@michkath - I’m sorry to hear you’re very distressed and sad about the breakup. The only thing you can do now is NO CONTACT and respect his request and don’t try to contact his mother or friends to ask about him! Allow him this time to manage his stress regarding work pressures and also to time to think more rationally. Rest assured that he will NEVER forget you, but whether or not he wants to get back together remains to be seen. Later on, don’t know when, but most likely he will get in touch with you to talk more. In the meantime, please take care of yourself and try very hard to calm down and not worry. Not eating properly and not getting enough sleep can harm your body and also adversely affect your thinking. You have to keep going and don’t obsess about him. Spend time with family and friends etc.
God Bless, take care of yourself, and be patient…
Thank you for the kind words.
I have let him be and I looked this morning at at 12am he text me ’ look I just want to say I’m sorry ’
I didnt reply as didn’t think it was the best thing to do. Also I didn’t know what sort of a sorry it was.
Do you think I did the correct thing ? X
@michkath - Yes, you did the right thing by not replying. The sorry could have been like sorry the break up hurt you, but who knows. Don’t reply unless he sends something more substantial. Good luck:)
It’s really hard as I really want to know what the sorry is for. But like you said it’s best not to reply. When is a good time to get in touch? Iv red on your page a letter is nice way instead of a text?
X
@michkath - You wrote:“He did say it’s taken me to break up with you to sort things out and the constant text messages from you is doing my head in & its making my decisions to end things stick more & more”.
By texting him too much you appear needy and makes his decision to break up seem like the right one. Don’t contact him for at least 30 days and don’t think about a letter (could be an email) just yet. I think sending a letter depends on if he wants to work through problems with you or not. Right now just focus on yourself.
Wishing you luck:)
I haven’t text him since he text at 12am saying ’ look I want to say I’m sorry ’
Your advice doesn’t make sense when you say ’ send a letter depends on if he wants to work things with you ’ but how do you know if they don’t want to work things out? That makes no sense
@michkath - If you don’t hear anything after a month, send a letter or email and go from there depending on how he reacts to it. If you get no response, stop initiating contact and consider the fact he may not want to get back together. If he replies and says that he’s confused or needs more time to think, don’t contact him again until he contacts you. If he lets you know that he wants to talk about the demise of the relationship and what went wrong on both sides and possible ways to fix it, it’s better to meet in person or talk over the phone. He might even want to start out slowly by going out with you to have fun times as in the beginning to reignite a spark, talk later and see how it goes. But there’s also the possibility he doesn’t want to reunite and doesn’t want to see or hear from you again or he might want to be friends sometime later. Only time will tell, but try to be patient.
I don’t know if Iv done a silly thing or not but yesturday I didn’t text him all day after he said ’ look I just wanted to say I’m sorry ’
I woke up at 6am in a state and text him -
’ just a quick message hope your feeling ok & you have a lovely weekend. Lots of love ’
I didn’t want to ask him about the apology as i didn’t want to cause a argument.
Am I stupid 
I really want to send the letter however not now in time. I think that is a really lovely thing to do
@michkath - Nice text, but it’s still another text. Okay, start day 1 of no contact tomorrow. You don’t need to ask what the apology meant. Someday maybe he will tell you, but just forget it right now.
Iv not text him like you’ve suggested and his text me saying can we talk Wednesday I replied yes and he said Iv ruined lives and I said I’m sure you haven’t and he says yes look at us ruined. I said don’t be silly. And he said well we will talk Wednesday. He said make sure you eat please and hope your ok. I don’t know if this is a bad thing or a bad thing? But I’m very concerned.
@michkath - Stop trying to figure out if it’s a bad or good thing! Nobody knows the answer to that. Did he ask to meet “in person” on Wednesday for the talk? Or is it going to be a phone call or text? Meeting in person would actually be the better way. Discussions via text can easily be misconstrued and during a phone conversation, you can’t see facial expressions etc… It’s nice he’s expressing concern about your physical welfare, but maybe just being nice. At any rate, listen to what he has to say and go from there…
I met him for a chat Thursday 13th face 2 face
It went well. He apologised for ending it way he did ( over text )
I said it really hurt me & I cried. He said my work is really stressing me out and I need be more open about it with you. And we need spend more time with eachother so I’m not focused on work. And I said yes I agree.
And I gave him a card with a night away inside ( his birthday next month )
I said open it when you get home and kissed me. He said he loved it and was nice gesture as I got it for his birthday and for the stress his going through.
So since last Thursday. Iv not seen him. We’ve been texting everyday and his saying he loves me ect. But this week he was away on business so couldn’t see me which fair enough. However this weekend Iv noticed his blocked me on Instagram & he said he fell and hurt his arm and went to hospital and I said if u want me to come I will. And I didn’t mention to him why have you blocked me as I fort leave it. And my cousin went on there and she said his been putting gym posts up perhaps he done it there and didn’t want you to see. And I didn’t understand why he would want to hide it from me. Anyways I just asked him is he annoyed with me and he said no I’m annoyed with myself. Now is that guilt? E.g. Hiding something?
I feel like his really pushing me away. But I really do love him. I’m not sure what is going on? Advice 
X
@michkath - I’m glad the meeting went well. I’m confused as to what the “night away” is? Anyway, don’t start overloading him with texts and don’t keep asking if he’s annoyed with you! Don’t ask about his feelings or his plans to see you because it will make you look like you’re being clingy and don’t have any self confidence. You blocked him on social media so maybe he blocked you on Instagram for the same reason. He only hurt his arm, he didn’t BREAK it, so just forget the gym pictures and DO NOT interrogate him about them! You need to learn to trust him more and stop doubting his words. Stop trying to guess what everything means and go by his words and actions. Don’t be so suspicious and just be happy and go with the flow.
Night away as in a hotel break. I got it because his birthday coming up in a weeks time and felt it was nice gesture as his been stressed at work ( that’s what he said why we broke up he said it was his work )
We are still texting from the meet up. All good things. However I have not seen him from the meet up. It’s now been 2 weeks since we’ve met. I feel like he doesn’t want to see me. But I haven’t told him that yet.
Iv made sure his birthday is extra special because of all this but nothing 100% booked yet. When I try to book it he doesn’t reply. And I am still blocked on Instagram. He has me on snapchat however and obviously he texts me. I’m feeling extremely hurt but I don’t and haven’t bombarded him with messages. Just keep crying as I feel something isn’t right since all of this. I don’t think he would cheat on me. But it’s hard over thinking.
@michkath - I’m confused about the hotel reservation. I thought you booked it already when you gave him the card. If you didn’t and are texting to ask him when it would be convenient and yet he doesn’t answer, maybe he doesn’t want to go to the hotel. Were you thinking of a hotel room for him alone or for the two of you?
Even though you said you haven’t bombarded him with messages, you said you two are still texting since the meet up and I think that’s too many times, especially if you’re the one initiating the texts and he’s simply replying.
You said you don’t think he’s “cheating” on you, but he broke up with you. Therefore, if he’s talking to, calling, or meeting other girls, it’s not cheating.
I’m not sure your understanding what I am saying! So I’m going to try to explain as simple as possible.
I met him for a chat face to face it on 13th so 2 weeks ago. It went well I gave him a card and said open it when you get home saying I love you here is a over night stay for 2. He said he loved it. It’s his birthday in a weeks time. Do you understand this now? I wouldn’t just buy a gift for no reason I’m not stupid to waste £200! If the chat didn’t go well I would of kept it and gone with a friend.
So since meeting we have been texting but not bombarding with contstant messages. Iv also asked when would you like to book this hotel stay for your birthday & every time I mention it he doesn’t respond. As if his avoiding it. Eg got second thoughts. His really pushing me away since the meet up. Iv not seen him eg says his arm hurts but yet his posting things on Instagram ( my cousin can see his posts I can’t as his blocked me )
It’s all very bizarre. So I stopped texting him to leave him be. And today I called him and he didn’t pick up he said he would call me back his at a event. So said sure mo problem.
Am I wasting my time here? Should I just forget about this? Was the meet load of rubbish? I’m so confused
I really love him but his completely pushing me away
What should I do?
The card I bought from the hotel direct so it was a ’ gift voucher ’ so there is no set date. It was something I had planned for his birthday he said he wanted to go. But I made sure it was in my name incase the chat didn’t go well. The hotel said if he doesn’t go I won’t loose money as I have a recipt as I explained to them my situation had changed. ( my partner doesn’t know this tho he know it’s a gift voucher for 2 at a lovely hotel )
( hope you understand now iv explained it simple! )
@michkath - Thank you I understand now. But if it’s a voucher for one room, he might feel it would be an awkward situation so soon after the breakup just barely a month ago. It’s always best to talk things over and start out slow…
I hope he calls back and decides to accept the hotel invitation as his birthday gift:)