Hi all,
I’m lost on a few minor but important details to develop and get past the second meeting.
Background- I’m 35 and she is 29. I’ve never been married and no kids. She’s got no kids, but engaged 3 times, married once, bi. Dated this girl for a little over 2 months. We are definitely attracted physically but she has been operating under the idea that she needs self work and physical intimacy must be delayed. She wants the next relationship to be the last relationship. So I gave kisses on the neck and body, but never on the mouth and didn’t have sex of any kind during those 2 months. She decided we should stop dating just before we were going to get intimate.
Current situation- I never begged nor treated her poorly. Gave 1 month space. I contacted her by phone and set up catch up meeting over coffee. The catch up went great mostly.
I had lost 15 pounds, had a different light hearted and happy playful vibe about me. She liked it a lot. Tested me with “I miss you.” To which I replied, “I miss you too, but we had our moment it didn’t work. But who knows what might happen.”
I asked her what she envisions for us moving forward. She tested me again and said “eventually it would be fun to go on a double date.” I asked her to elaborate. She said, “when you get a girlfriend and I get a boyfriend. And we could be friends.” I laughed and said, you think you’d be cool with that? And followed up by saying, “I thought you didn’t want a boyfriend or lover.” She said, “well, you’re right not Right now.” Finally I added, “we can certainly explore a friendship with one or two more meetings, but we both know it isn’t something that usually works. So it is what it will be.” She said added, “we need to be careful to meet in safe places and not alone so we don’t get carried away with each other.”
She had spilled coffee accidentally on my shirt at the start of the date and several times suggested I take my shirt off for her.
We ended with a hug. Then when she was about to walk off, she wanted another hug and started tickling my side. I slowly backed away and said, “you have already gotten the max number of hugs. You think you can just get as many as you want?” She followed me until I stopped moving and walked into my stride and gave me a really intimate hug and said she likes how playful I have become.
I got her to add me back to Facebook as a friend. I had stupidly removed myself at the start of the break.
So I intentially didn’t set up a second meet up during the first. Now I feel lost. 31 hours after the meet up, my buddy convinces me to text her an invite to go out of town with the group to tube a river. So I did. She replied with, “Thank you for the invitation! You are center of fun! This time I can’t join, have fun!”
The Question-
What do I do now to push the reconciliation forward?
Do I playfully text her?
Do I set up occasional phone calls?
Do I just start inviting her places?
Do I rely on Facebook fun pictures only?
Thank you for your answers.