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Hey all! hope you’re all enjoying the nice weather today! Cuz it’s been storming whole day here and that really makes me feel down..
Alright I’ll go back to studying and stay calm..
LA –
I am so happy for you. NC did work for you! You didn’t just pass those days with nothing but you actually thought why you broke up and made positive changes! I’m sure she’ll see a new you and hopefully you can get back with her!Good luck LA2.0!!!!
Dear Andy,
I agree with Khine on the “mutual friend” thing. I feel like mutual friend is kinda tricky. Our mutual friend (mainly just one, through whom I knew ex) did ok I think. She showed part of their chat history and when my ex said “The only thing I ask is you help her to succeed, grades and tests”, she replied “I will. She just kept asking me do you still like her and I told her she needs to focus on herself. She’s been working hard, I think she’ll do well.” Not perfect, but pretty decent. Because in front of her, I was actually worse. Like I couldn’t stop crying and I was so desperate. If she told my ex anything about it, I’m done.
So I plan to show our mutual friends that I’m becoming strong, independent and better in all aspects in my life. If anytime I feel down, I will just talk to my friends instead.
🙂
Julia –
I am so sure that he didn’t move on. Actually just in Kevin’s email today (I’m around 10th day of subscription) He mentioned the phases – “Breakup Pain Healing >>>> Bad Memories Healing >>>> Missing You Badly >>>> Moving On”Personally I guess it’s just a rebound. And keep positive by trying to believe that rebound will actually make him miss you more, make him how good are you.
I know it’s hard. Although I’m ok most of the time, when I think of him from time to time, my heart aches. But you’re not alone anyway, all of us are here for you 🙂
Good luck!
Joe
personally I think you worry too much :)! I feel like the two people are in different stages. Like we are the ones who had to accept the breakup, so we were devastated from the beginning and then we became stronger and better. On the other hand, they made the decision and after a certain time, they will think again.And you can check my reply in this post, it’s my personal experience how one of my ex managed to get back with me 🙂
And I am so happy for you feeling better and not driving by her house!
A.Z,
I’m so sorry! I hope you’ll recover in a minute! 😀
All the luck 🙂Joe,
How you doing lately? Did you stop driving by her house? (Sorry if I didn’t ask in a right way.. Not native speaker 😛 )
And it’s amazing that you commented a lot in this forum! Your comments have been really helpful!Khine –
I agree with you, the ignoring is the best weapon. Actually, it shows that you have the power to control yourself and you’re emotionally resolved.And hey EVERYONE –
For those who’s interested in my story, here’s the link: https://www.forum.exbackpermanently.com/boards/topic/may-seem-impossible-but-i-want-to-try-my-best-to-get-back-with-him/The bright thing for us is that he’s too busy to date other girls. And he’s not in the time to date girls. The down side is that we’re far away from each other..
How our relationship started was a little bit different since I’m Chinese and he’s American (but not that American.. Like he doesn’t really go on dates and enter into dating.. Ugh I don’t know how to express). Like Dara said before, it can be very situational. So I’ll just cheer up and keep my hope!
So….
Day 9 for myself 🙂 Just had my exam yesterday and will have another one at the end of August. Seems like I’ll be busy working hard for my own goals!!!I have to admit that I still think of him from time to time, but I don’t feel like desperate anymore. Actually, I am really starting to think this break (yeah I still see it just as a break) might be a good thing for us 🙂 He’s been stressed too much that he even couldn’t sleep. I do care about him and I do want him to be healthy. Since he needs time and space, give him.
Also since this break, I was forced to reflect in this relationship, which seems to be perfect to me : what went wrong? Yeah guys are always the ones who took all the responsibility and girls (at least in my case) are more likely to enjoy. As time passes, he took more and more responsibility and his work became more and more stressful, meanwhile what I was focusing all the time is enjoying the relationship and being happy (myself). I didn’t realize (because seriously, I’m pretty nice) but I may have started to take things for granted and become needy.. Because he has a life, and my life is all about him.
I’m starting to think that, maybe we both could use this break to work on ourselves respectively. And I know how to be more independent and actually work hard for my goals but not for him. (I used to set him as my motivation for everything, now he’s gone I was devastated.) And he could reflect too, that he could have communicated with me rather than took it all by himself. And hopefully he would think of all the great memories we’ve created and all the dishes that I cook. (He LOVED my cooking:)!)
I remembered when we watched the movie UP this summer, he told me that he liked all the adventures we had together. When I left and came home, he told me that he was looking forward our next adventure together 🙂 (before we broke up of course. The break thing happened after a little more than 2 weeks after I came home)
He gets up super super early everyday, like 4am for work. He would wake me a little bit, hug me and say “I love you” before he leave. There was one morning that I was too sleepy that I didn’t even open my eyes or say anything. After he left, I felt so empty right away so I went downstairs and out of the building on my bare foot just to hug him. He was walking towards his car and when he saw me he had a really big smile. He messaged “thank you for the extra hug” later. Nice memories.
Don’t know why I’m talking about this, it seems like I’m not supposed to talk about all the memories.. But I’m actually not sad. I’m positive for my or our future. Just keep in mind: every improvement I made is one step closer to him.
Sorry if I posted too long or my words made no sense!
Have a great day guys! Good luck to all of us!!!!
Hello everyone 🙂
My exam went ok, I’ll go into next exam soon tho!
I guess I’ll give myself a half day break and I’ll use that to read Relationship Rewind, hope that will give me power and peace!Oops!! Because of some stupid settings I may have applied to Facebook, I got notifications of his updated status 🙁 He just came from a wedding and he wrote “Tonight I witnessed the concrete acknowledgement of the most beautiful aspects of life. Congratulations, on your discovery of what it means to live, laugh, and love.”
I know I shouldn’t be obsessed with it but I couldn’t help! He barely gets “emotional” like this on Facebook and all I’m thinking is whether he’s thinking about me because the last wedding he attended was with me and it was perfect…
Plus 7th NC for me and I think I’m preparing well for the exam 🙂
Hi Edward,
Thank you for your comment!!! I’ll try my best to keep positive and focus on my goals!
I’m originally from China 🙂 I came to the states last August 🙂
Edward,
Just saw you became active in the forum 🙂 And I am so happy for you getting back with your ex 🙂Do you mind adding some insights to my story if that didn’t bother you?
May seem impossible but I want to try my best to get back with him
LA–
I’m sorry for how you feel and I actually don’t know how to help because I’m the same 🙁 But I do hope you can get better!Steve–
Thank you so much for your comment again!
I haven’t read all the comments here because of my exam on next Monday. I have another one on Aug 31st. But I’ll go through the stories here next week 🙂 And after August I’ll start to study Relationship Rewind. My school starts at the end of August and career season is coming so hopefully time will go faster for me! Get distracted! Can’t think about him all the time!
I think I should restrict myself for Facebook for a while.. Maybe just use it to upload photos to show I’m doing great 🙂And everyone else here in this post –
Hi 🙂 I hope everyone is having a great night (or morning wherever you are!) 🙂Guys I am so blessed to have you all!
For now, only around 2 hours in the morning are pretty challenging, but the rest of the day is usually ok. Very thankful.
Now I will have to put all the energy I’ve got on my exam. Every time I think of him, I will just tell myself, the more independent I am, the closer I am to him. So right now, dive into books and succeed without him. Prove it.
Thanks again. I am almost tearful while reading your comments here. How lucky I am. 🙂
