Why isn't he talking anymore

reconciliation
1

Hi!
My ex boyfriend and I broke up 3 months ago because he needed time to focus on his depression. We both agreed to keep the door open because our relationship was good and we were happy. But he was confused out life and his feelings and couldn’t give me what I deserved at that time. I jokingly warned him, that I would fight for him if I could in the future and he agreed. Since then we didn’t speak for a while, and he had the single life fun. Then he ended up texting me really nice things, how proud he was he got to date me etc. We went for coffee 2 months after breaking up, and it was like old times, we both felt really comfortable and talked about deep life things. Saw each other another two times and he was almost acting like we were still together, putting his hand on my knee, telling me how hard it was to break up with me, how happy he was we could talk etc. Just like when we met, he’s not really good at texting, but when we see each other it’s great. He initiated texting a few times, even asked to see me briefly. The texting is very hot and cold but always nice, friendly and sometimes flirty. He even got a me a Christmas present. When I told him I had his present, he said ‘text me when you’re free so I can have it’ I insisted on him texting me instead. It’s been almost 2 weeks and he hasn’t. No signs from him at all, I’m not ready to give up just yet, how do you guys perceive this situation? I didn’t text him since then because I don’t want to take a step back in my own recovery if things didn’t work out. Do you think I can text him in a few days, asking when he is free? Knowing him I’m not reading too much into it because he is so terrible at planning things and texting, but I also wish he’d put more effort if he wants to see me. Is 3 months too short? I don’t want to wait too long and let the opportunity slip, things seem to be going pretty good ?

*Please tell me what you objectively think about the situation, not “you should move on he’s your ex for a reason” I’m very much trying, but some things are worth a try, thanks!

2

I think you should just text him and ask if he want to see you… look he is not ignoring you, right? Maybe he is just not sure what you want… OH GOD I wish I was in your shoes right now, because my ex didn’t even want to talk to me. Go ahead and try to reach out, and if he is not responding, or the way you want to just go for NC.

3

@Elissa01 thanks for your reply! I know how it feels I used to think like you, maybe just give it more time! Like you said when they’re not opened to contact the only way is NC until they’re a bit more opened. I guess you’re right, I’m out of the country for now, but when I’m back I will ask him. He must be confused, I’m acting pretty hot and cold too, but I’m the one who got broken up with so it makes more sense to me.

4

Yeah… but because of you hot and cold he is confused. Trust me, I know that for sure, because I am the dumper, and I can see what’s in his mind. Maybe we can chat somewhere else?

5

@elissa01 sure!

6

But we not allowed to write down personal infos uh oh :slight_smile:

7

Let me know if I can help you with anything!

8

@elissa01 Thanks for your opinion! Let me know if I can help you as well, annoying we can’t share info!