I attend classes at the university with my ex. She broke up with me at the beginning of October. The reason was she didn’t feel anything towards me. I begged, pleased, as you can guess it didn’t work (and wasn’t smart either). Things changed, I got my shit together and constantly work on myself. We talked at the end of November when I broke NC because I didn’t want to avoid her, she looked like she felt unconfortable too but she said that our contact will not be like it used to be. I nodded as it’s pretty normal our contact will not reach ‘friend’ level because of what happened between us. Recently she started to act different, I would say even jealous because of her noticing I text with my female acquaintance. Apart from that, I took advantage of NC and started to work on myself, many people told me I’ve changed for the better so this is really uplifting. She started to act more friendly towards me (I keep more of a Limited Contact rather than NC because of the classess we attend together) so I’m wondering if it’s time to end NC during holidays, simply text her ‘happy holidays’ and see if she continues the conversation. I respect her decision and desire to have space but I thought I’d give it a try.
@vato - If she just says Thank You or You too, that’s the end of it. Dragging out any casual conversations will get you nowhere! Sometime after the new year, maybe ask her out for coffee or lunch. Go with your gut feelings about the situation.
She’s been friendly towards me lately, today she even asked me for a cigarette which was kinda surprising, we stood for a while and talked. Don’t know if I should and how start a text, let’s say after New Year.
@vato - Since you had a nice conversation today (I assume at school), it would probably be okay to wish her a Merry Christmas and ask to meet for coffee. But DO NOT talk about the relationship, unless SHE brings it up and absolutely don’t do anymore begging! If she agrees, be upbeat and try to relax. But since she apparently asked for space, she might not be ready to meet up with you yet. I think you might be concerned about being friend zoned, but that’s how relationships first start out. Slowly over time feelings develop. She said the contact won’t be what it used to be. Sorry I forgot how long you were together and wondering if the only reason she gave for the break up was ‘lost feelings’? Good luck:)
If she won’t agree to meet, should I go NC through the holidays and new year? Don’t worry, I’m done with begging We were together only 2 months and yes, this was the only reason for a break up.
@vato - If she won’t meet up, yes, go no contact through the holidays and beyond. Maybe for at least another month afterwards. Wishing you luck again, lol.
I’m starting to think whether asking her for coffee will look needy, I’m not sure if it’s the right time now. The guy that she’s texting and meeting with (the one who studies long way from our town) comes for christmas so I guess if they’ll get together, it will be during christmas break. I think I’ll pass now and just wait.
We were together only 2 months and yes, this was the only reason for a break up.