Need advice

reconciliation
1

Right this is my first time posting on here and I need some advice , me and my ex were together for 11 years we have a little girl together aswell we split up a few times within the relationship but always loved each other about 8 months ago she cheated saying I wasn’t there enough etc etc as I was living separately from her but we moved back in together to a new house to try make things work but lasted 6months and I moved out again to try find myself again be a better person and so my daughter wouldn’t witness anymore arguements between us and also to see if I could see what was wrong and broke and try fix it properly this time because we never did and always jumped straight back in, I tried the no contact for a bit and did some stupid things like adding females etc and they started liking my Facebook pics etc and she became very annoyed about this saying I’m going out on dates etc she started the same stuff was just silly she sent me a txt about 2weeks ago now about how I left and how she cried every nite hoping and waiting to see if we would work again etc then about 2 days after that txt she accepted a date from the guy she cheated on me with and since that date he’s been with her almost every night and has pretty much moved into her house has been introduced to my daughter and when iv went to pick my daughter up to spend time with her she’s always very smiley and the last time she came to the door was overly happy she looks thinner within the last 2 weeks but my question is is she moving way to fast is this a rebound relationship and is this to fill the space I left bcos it seems very quick that he’s moved in etc but she seems happy or is this some front she also texted saying she’s moved on and I should do the sane I’m lost please help? .

Thank you

2

Your approach to “fixing” things was wrong. You should have stayed in the home and had enough self-control not to argue in front of your daughter. You two could have been polite and respectful and gone to marriage counseling or tried to work through the problems when the daughter wasn’t there or at night behind closed doors when she was sleeping.

Rather than trying to resolve the problems in your marriage, I think you moved out to get even with your wife and you wanted to flirt with other women. But if you really want to work through your issues with each other, she has to be willing to do so. You could take the first step by asking her if she wants to repair the relationship and if she’s willing to take the first step by meeting up with you. Also ask if she’s willing to go to counseling.

Her relationship with the new man might be a rebound and her attempt to find out if another man would treat her better. If she’s not willing to reconcile there’s nothing you can do except ask if she wants a divorce.

This is a very sad situation because a child is involved…