Hi there, i’m already going to apologize for my English because it’s not my native language. Anyway my boyfriend broke up with me like 2 months ago and we were together for 15 months. It’s really hard for me to accept it because he was my first one and he said that he still lobes me. Then you could ask, why did he do it then?
My ex is a very stressy boy who has autismz he was very sweet to me and he is not that social. That’s not a problem for me because i’m also not that social. My parents and sister are really extrovert and they couldn’t handle his introvert behaviour. They told me that he wasn’t good enough for me and that i deserve better. So the biggest mistake I made was that I’ve tried to change him for my parents. But he was good for me… i know i shouldn’t do that. And actually he changed a bit for me. Because he knew how important my family is for me and he did that. More months have passed and my parents and I got more fights because of him. Well for making the long story shorter… he broke up with me because he couldn’t do it anymore. He feels very exhausted because of the fights, stress etc.
i really regret it that I put have a lot of pressure on him. Well after the breake up i begged and pleaded constantly. And i know, i pushed him further away. I went a couple of times to his house because i can’t let go and I’m a really jealous person. I told him that I have seen my mistakes and that I’ve changed. But he doesn’t believe me. He said that maybe later we could be together and a few day later he said that he can’t. He can’t do it anymore. He thinks he can’t handle a relationship and that kills me. I’ve tried to talk with his mother by text because i really want him back and she knows him the best. But she showed the messages I’ve send her to him and know he thinks that i’m manipulating her for getting him back.
Now my question is? What should I do? I really want him back and I’m trying to not contact him but sometimes it’s stronger than myself. I already apologized for my behavior to him and he said that it was ok and said sorry for his behavior. Do you guys think I still have a chance with him if I don’t contact him for a while? Or what are your opinions?
Texting his mother was not the right thing to do! Putting his own mother into the middle of your situation was unfair and unkind. You need to accept that he does not want to reunite and stop pressuring him into changing his mind. Stop begging & pleading!
You didn’t accept him the way he is and tried to change him in order to please your parents and sister. You need to seriously think about why you did that! Perhaps you too think you deserve someone else who is more of an extrovert?
You might get a 2nd chance if you go no contact for at least a month or two, but nobody knows for sure. But surely you will push him further away if you continue to nag him.
Well I have been thinking about it a lot and I regret it. But when u are losing something your mind just can’t stop. And I’m really trying. I’ve started the no contact and i’m regretting for texting his mother and all the pleading and naghing. I haven’t nagged since 1 month. I already send him 1 last text message as an apologise for my behavior (a clean slate text?). He responded immediately and said I’M also sorry for all the things I’ve done to you. He also did big mistakes and he feels very guilty for it. In that text I’ve said that i’ve accepted the break up so I could change. And it really is. It opened my eyes what I really want and who j want to be. I couldn’t be myself lately at home and that’s what i’m doing right now. Being myself. And it feels a relief.
But the more I’m myself, the more I see commen interests with him. He also replied with a smiley that I just can’t analyze it. The smiley he sent was ? for the point that I’ve said that i’ve accepted if. I will give him time and do the no contact. I’m just afraid that he will move on. I know he won’t have another girlfriend, but I’m afraid he will forget me. I have made big mistakes by calling him, nagging, asking to his mother etc. i just hope it will be ok with the no contact. I will at least 1 month like you said and max 2 months. I will take things very slow after that. Because he already said that I mean a lot to him… i’m just so confused and hurted. I really hate myself for my behavior because I’m afraid it’s too late now… especially when you said it like that… thanks for the reply anyway.