He left me and blocket me everywhere

Hi,

So a week ago my fiance broke up with me over messenger. We have been together for 5 years and we were supposed to move in together next month. He lives 4 hours from me but the distance was never a problem we always worked it out.

I begged him to call me and tell me why. So I called him the next day and we talked for an hour. He told me he doesn’t want to be with me and that he doesn’t care. He was so cold like i was nobody to him! I’m in chok! I asked him if he could think about it but he said he was 100% sure. He sounded so cold and i cried and begged him to stay and later on he said he doesn’t love me. I don’t believe him. Only two days before the break up he asked me to come and visit him, to travel again in January and we agreed to finally i should move in, so why does he suddenly break up with me? He said how much he loves, so why break up with me? I’m so devasted and confused! He was out with some friends the day before and he was drinking, but didn’t even contact me the whole night. So i got very angry and send him some messages and now i regret it. Could it be this? He wants his freedom, without me getting angry every time he’s partying and does not even have a minut to send me a message or call me.

We broke up 6 months ago also but we figured it out, but this time its different. He has been acting strange for a while. Some days he wants to be with me and some days he doesn’t. Days before the break up he said he isnt feeling good and very depressed. He wants to be alone and doesn’t want to talk to anyone. What does that mean? I tried to help him but he just pussed me away every time.

So 2 days after he broke up he deleted all our pictures. And the day after this he blocked me everywhere even though i asked him not to delete the pictures because im not ready for it. I begged him but he did it anyway. I’m so broken! How could he delete all these memories and just move on like that? Is there any chance he will ever reach out to me again? How can NC even work if he blocked me everywhere? What should i do? I love him so much and doesn’t want to loose him. But have i lost him? Does he even care about me? He sounded like everything was my fault and told me more times over the phone he doesn’t care. Help me. How can the NC rule even work when he lives 4 hours from me?