My ex and I broke up about 2 months ago. He was the one who ended the relationship. The night of the breakup, I did send one of those “please don’t do this text” (I know yikes). But I quickly found this website and initiated NCR. However, since the breakup normally every 10 days or so my ex will reach out to me. He’ll send the “I love you. I miss you text” and I would always respond and we would have a really good conversations about reconciliation.
However it is always the same thing every 10 or so days. After we have a good day of conversation, we say goodnight and that we still love each other. In the morning I would send a simple good morning text and suddenly, its like a switch has flipped. Overnight, my ex seems to get upset and says he dosen’t want to talk anymore. This has now happened 3 or so times in the course of two months.
The most recent time he reached out and was being super lovey (even mentioned us getting together that night to talk), I confronted him about his wishy washyness and he got really upset. He even told me that I’d never hear from him again. Yet he texted me a couple days later with a question. Why do you think he continues to be so hot and cold? Also, do you think this will be the last time he’ll contact me?
Any help is appreciated.
How long was the relationship? Were you both happy and kind to each other?
Your good morning texts were unnecessary (that’s something couples might do) and you were only “talking” about reconciliation at the time.
Why did he break up with you? Wishy washyness indicates confusion as to what to do. Start no contact to give him time to be able to think more rationally because right now he’s still confused and can’t decide if he made the right choice or maybe regrets it.
Hello!
We were together 2 weeks shy of a year. and it was a really great relationship. He was my best friend and I was his. The good morning text that i referred to was me following up regarding the conversation before to see if he actually wanted to meet up.
His reasons for ending the relationship tend to change. My understanding was because he needed time to focus on himself. However, he’s since told his friends differently. I’ve been doing no contact for 5 weeks now and haven’t heard from him. His friends have told my friends that is he struggling with the breakup. I was just getting ready to reach out to him because i feel a lot better about everything and followed all the steps. But i just heard he’s been texting a new girl and they are planning on going on a date soon. I’m not sure if i should back off? Or what??? please help!!
If you want him back, stay no contact and make him reach out to you. I can almost guarantee that he will within the next 4 weeks. Even if you hear that he is struggling with the breakup, don’t reach out to him. You will only set yourself back. The reason he is struggling with the breakup is because he isn’t hearing from you every day to remind him that you are still his safety net and backup plan. Every day that anxiety is going to get stronger. He might try to cover it up by talking to other women or even dating them, but I promise you, if you had a great relationship with him for almost a year and he is talking to other women only 3 weeks after you started no contact, all that will ever be is a rebound relationship where he is constantly comparing her to you. And, she will not measure up to his expectations and what he wants. In other words, he is trying to replace you with someone who is just like you and it’s not going to happen. But if you contact him before he comes to you, you are only going to make it easier for him to keep seeking attention for someone else and feel safe knowing that you are not moving on and still his back up plan. That is not going to get him back, no matter how much you reason with him that you are the right woman for him. Stay no contact. I am confident it will work in your favor.
Also, stop asking about him. If he hears that you are asking around about his activities, that will have the same affect of reassuring him that you are not moving on and still longing for him. If people are just volunteering the info without you asking, simply tell them that is his business and you don’t need to know.