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@Mj: I think you should make it sound like you accepted the break up and willing to move on but still make her feel how much you loved her and cared for her, don’t be too emotional, accept your mistakes. Tell her about new things in your life and about the improvement you made. I think the letter should be sincere but also light-hearted and positive.
@KD1988 @Mj Thank you! You’re right! I should be more optimistic π
I think it won’t change much but maybe it will make him see things from another perspective.
My mom also had a conversation with my ex early after the break up, he told her things he didn’t tell me, that he loves me and that I’m the only one he truly wants, so maybe it will help soften him up a bit.@KD1988: I know NC is very hard but yeah it’s mostly for yourself, also it makes you feel better than getting hurt and rejected over and over again.
I’ve just called him. we talked for a while and I asked him if he wants to meet at the new mall this weekend, he said he’s working until evening so we’ll only have one hour to hangout before they close, so he offered to meet next week. also he said that he’ll let me know if he can finish work early that day. And when I asked him how his friends doing he started counting the number of times he met with each friend and described me where they hanged out and such.
Does it mean anything? or maybe i’m just over thinking it..
@KD1988: His feeling can’t change so quickly, it takes a lot of time to forget the one you loved, I think he just needs more time to calm down a bit, maybe he’s still confused and hurt from the break up but doesn’t show it. what I learned from all of this is that it really takes a long time and patience to get your loved one back, sometimes I just want to give up and let go but I realized that it’s not so easy.
Yes for now keep the NC but don’t initiate conversations with him, hope things will get better for you, stay strong!@KD1988: It sounds better then I expected, he still cares for you, but I think he’s still hurt and that’s why he can’t meet with you right now, which means he still has feelings for you, give him some time to handle his feelings.
My ex also couldn’t meet me few days after the break up, but after some time he agreed.His letter still hasn’t arrived but I’m planning on asking him to meet me again, this weekend a new mall opens up and we are both excited about it, so I thought that maybe this is a good chance, what do you guys think?
Thank you!! that really is motivating! I’m happy to see that people here are really getting their exes back. It gives me hope π I haven’t heard your story before but I feel happy for you π
I agree with you, true love doesn’t die, and if two people truly love each other, they will always find their way back to each other, if not, then maybe they just haven’t loved you enough.
@KD1988 My ex’s letter still hasn’t arrived as well, I’m checking my mailbox every hour and watching the door in case the postman will arrive LOL, I can’t keep up like this! can’t sleep well at night, I know the letter wouldn’t change anything but deep inside I keep hoping but I know I shouldn’t :\
We’ve also talked on the phone this weekend and had a nice conversation, he seemed interested in talking and I felt some change in his voice and the way he talked but maybe that’s just my imagination.I guess we just have to wait till tomorrow and see what happens. At least we know that we’ve tried everything we could. I’m wishing you the best of luck!
Be calm, don’t be emotional and most important be yourself π
I think it’s a good thing in some way because it means that they took the time and effort to write back but I honestly can’t say if it would be positive or not..
I’m in the same situation right now. Sent him a letter after NC and he told me that he sent one back, also thanked me for sending it.
I’m afraid that the letter might be a goodbye letter, even though he was nice when we talked on the phone and I felt some mixed signals from him, maybe this could be just my imagination, so confused.
Do you think that a response letter could be a good sign? or maybe if he wanted to get back together he would have just called already?
As I said be apathetic, It’s up to you to decide but I suggest that you follow the No Contact rule for a few days and give her some time to miss you.
Thanks you’re right, I called him and we talked for about 30 minutes, he said that he received my letter and sent me a response letter! the letter should arrive tomorrow, also the conversation was flowing nice and I felt like he’s sending me mixed signals, but maybe that’s just me thinking too much and analyzing his behavior all the time..
Guess I have to wait for tomorrow to see, It’s just that I’m afraid that his letter might be a goodbye letter..You can response after a while but be apathetic in your answers, and don’t initiate conversations with her. I know how you feel, the hardest thing is to distance yourself from the one you love, and you feel that you just can’t give up on them even when it seems hopeless.
This distance is also for yourself, work and improve yourself, do things you like, that way you won’t seem needy and make her feel that you don’t need her in your life in order to be happy.I think she acts like that because she’s still confused about what she wants but still wants you by her side, maybe she’s afraid of losing you. I’m sure this is hard for her as well, I think that the best thing you can do right now for both of you is to give her some time to think, be more distance so she’ll see that you need that distance too,but I don’t think you should really ignore her, after some time she’ll realize how much she misses you and wants you back in her life.
I don’t think you should tell her that, I know how hard it is, you share everything together and open up so much and you want to tell her everything, but then you realize that you can’t do it anymore. be strong and patient, I think you have a good chance π
It seems that she still loves you and cares about you very much. She can’t forget about you just like that, you’ve been together for a long time.
I know that people sometimes react like that when they’re under pressure in their life, maybe she’s in a period in her life that she feels confused and doesn’t know what to do about it.My ex broke up with me after we had some fights, but I know that he’s been under real pressure because he couldn’t decide which university to choose and there were many important decisions he had to make, so obviously these fights made it harder for him.
You have to give her some time to think about you and miss you, then it will make her realize how much she loves you and needs you in her life.
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