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Thank you for your reply.. I’ve been feeling so down lately I really needed some insights on what to do next. I wanted us to work out so badly, moreover this is our second chance I don’t want to lose it. But since I’m so emotional now I figure to give it all some time. I miss him so badly. We just came back from a trip together last week, and during that entire trip he was so caring and sweet we were just so happy together. Now that we’re back to reality again he became a little distant, but we kept in touch and make plans for Christmas.
I’m afraid it’s just my insecurity again that makes me over think. But like you said this kind of things takes time. I hope I’m strong enough to get through this period. I still want him in my life.
Hmm I really feel she need to get herself together :/ Only if she decided she needed a change , to become a better her. Then only she deserve your time to try to work things out and grow potentially as a couple again. It’s good that the odds are in your favour now, at least we all know!
I guess we are all a little bit emotional about vday aren’t we? It’s just that we are a stronger person now so we know how to get hold of our situation now.Well I hope so, I mean I’ve learn to let go anyway. But a part of me is holding on because I feel it’s a waste to give up, but it’s not like I can decide anything. For now my best approach is to pull back a little. If I matter to him he’ll made a move. Just like how he asked me out for dinner a month a ago and we end up had a really great time and chatting here and there until today. I know for sure I don’t need him to complete me, I’m a whole now , not so broken anymore. It just sucks to give up on a person you spend so much time for, all the efforts . It’s pathetic. How people give up on people so easily.
Sorry for late reply! 🙁 And I’m happy that you’re a stronger person emotionally now. At least her foolishness gave you motivation to be your better self. Stay strong !
For me I still miss him a lot sometimes. We’ve been chatting here and there these days. That day I posted a status , a quite depressing one. He came up and asked me about it. Then another day he randomly chat up with me saying that he noticed I haven’t go to bed. Then we chat up a little. Funny tho but I guess I’m really happy that he still cares for me. :’) As a guy what’s your opinion on this?
I’m not rushing anything though, I believe me and him still need time apart to find ourselves. But in the same time we kinda want to keep each other in our lives. It’s okay though if we end up being friends, at least it feels more okay to get in touch later in the future .Well good for her! *sarcastically lol* I mean she need to learn to get hold of her emotions, and what she wants in her life. You ain’t gonna wait for her forever. Sometimes I still struggle and got depressed cause of stress. But I’m sure I want to get my life together I want to be the better me. Thanks for your motivation though! I want to pull back a little again I don’t want my ex to feel like well .. I need him :/ Although he really meant a lot to me and knew me more than anyone else. But I need to learn to save myself from my own thoughts…if that makes sense.
I think that it’s really normal that he pulled back again, that’s what happened to me back then! I actually asked him out for a catch up quite some months ago, he agreed and seem all excited about it, then he suddenly turned cold again, like he acted like he’s not sure if he wanna meet up anymore. That really broke my heart and pissed me off at the same time. I felt that’s the thing about guys! They’re just really afraid of commitment, maybe your ex is thinking you’ll eventually end up ‘persuading’ him back, or he’s just afraid to deal with his emotions, something like that. :/
Just remember to not give up hope. I’m happy that you said you feel so much happier as days gone by! It’s a sign you’re healing! 🙂 Stay strong <3 I feel that if you hate waiting that much just ask him. You’re in control of your own emotions. Remember when you meet up him you’re not about getting back together, not that fast. You’re just casually hangout out, and making sure the connection you share is positive and happy. Show him the new and improved you! 😀
Thank you friend! I can’t agree more. I’m just afraid now that I’ll end up hoping too much again. Because I bet he agrees too that we both know each other so well and we still share this strong connection. We can talk about anything and everything. It such a waste to give up on people like this in our lives. but it’s not like I can control anything. We been chatting quite a lot lately, and I really enjoyed it. My ‘true’ friends left me,they don’t even bother to be there for him, but when I talked with him about it he gave he best advice and just be there and hear me out I’m truly touched. :’) I just want be be the better me for now.
How you and your ex btw @nightdeleon?
aww Laur.. I’m so sorry you have to go through all these again 🙁 But I’m sure it’s gonna be easier since you are a stronger woman now <3 My ex gave me hot and cold behaviour too these past month, and just like you I gave in at first :/ But started no contact again and now we chatted up abit again but everything was kinda.. fine. I guess I still really enjoyed his presence, so did he and we both are just not ready of a relationship. Or maybe they are just curious of all the other options out there, well sad to let them know that no one will ever love them like we did. We won’t just wait around. At the meantime let’s just be the best of ourselves again. If they really still treasure us time will prove everything, but we have to move on for the better for ourselves. It’s like we gave up on this love completely, but we chose to not live on fake hopes and getting all heartbroken again. If God want us to be together again then we’ll surely find our way back somewhere down the road. If not we should sincerely wish them the best too, right? I would do that. Stay strong gal <3
It’s been about 2 weeks since we last met up and I missed him a lot. I’ve been stressing out lately, and friends that I thought would be there for me didn’t. I was really struggling and I felt so weak. I end up I texting my ex and told him everything. He was concerned and he replied giving me his advice and wants me to be okay and said we’ll chat again when he head home. I’m so glad that eventhough we are not officially together,we’re still there for each other. I was so worried I may seem needy but I’m glad it didn’t turn out that way. He was and still be my best friend and the person that knows me the most, so do I. We still share still strong..bond I would say.
It’s just now I got a feeling we both are not ready to be in a committed relationship now. University is just getting busier and busier. I don’t want to say that he’s just a best friend, because he’s more than that but we’re not lovers, just someone really special in my heart. It’s nostalgic thinking about all the things we’ve been through. I didn’t expect to be able to get this close again, but I’m really glad we both made this move.
This distance made us grow up a lot as a person. Our thinking are more mature now. I could feel we are actually on the same page again. But of course I don’t want to rush anything I want to last forever. And if we are really not meant to be as a couple, I really want him to be happy too, and maybe we could still be in each other’s lives in some way, since we knew each other so so well.
It’s not painful to look back at our memories now. That day when we met up, he showed me our pictures that he still kept in his phone, some of his favourite ones he said. 🙂 And we were both laughing about how dorky we both look back then. As a conclusion, I’m happy that we’ve made this move, whether we’ll end up in a unbreakable friendship, or we’re slowly building up that foundation to a stronger and healthier relationship. I just want everyone to realise that, only you can save yourself. You both need to move on for yourself , then maybe your paths will crossed again.
Woah. This guys definitely sounded immature :/ When we just broke up I accidentally saw his chatbox, and there he goes chatting up with his ex…well not even it was just his super duper huge crush back then. He deleted her from everywhere when we were together and the first thing he does is add her back from everywhere after we broke up. I didn’t saw my ex hanging out with girls,or maybe he’s just hiding it from social medias. Because he knows I’ll see it.
I felt we definitely are experiencing the same situation. He was acting like he was so not over me and trying to work things out with me again just last week. Now we didn’t even talk. And just like you, I won’t reach out to him, ever. At least not anytime soon.
It seems like, our ex guys doesn’t even know what they want. And they thought having all the stones matter when ( you know.. we are the diamonds haha) They just don’t want to settle down . They don’t want to make a decision , they don’t know what their heart really want. Well good for them, let’s take this as a chance to become a more beautiful woman inside out. Because yeap, we deserve it 😀 We’re worthy of a love we truly deserve. A quote really really hit me hard today:
If you can’t change a situation, change your mind
And it definitely fit everyone of us, we don’t deserve to sit here struggling to make things right when the other person doesn’t even care, or maybe they are not mature enough to see our point of view. But what that really matters is we should not ever give up on ourselves. At the end of the day we’re alone anyway and if we don’t give love to ourselves then who will?
Anyway,let’s keep each other updated! 🙂 Oh and by the way, do you have any hobbies or what do you do on your free time?
I know I guess my little mistake was making it all too easy for him. :/ During the first time we hung out , everything was perfect, we can’t get each other out of our arms, we were drinking beer together, talking and cuddling just like before. Then we spend a night together and it was still perfect. Then we still can’t get enough of each other and he asked me to hangout again. I agreed because I was free too anyway. And there were circumstances too it’s the last time we both are out of schedule so we both thought it’s a good idea.
I guess too much of everything is a no-no. I should keep some distance I know. :/ Now we are not even talking. And everything was so different a week before. I guess we moved a little too fast too. But I’m not losing hope. I’m doing NC again for some clarity, and to give more love to myself,because I know I’m worth it. I’m not doing it for particularly how many days I’ll do NC till I feel right. And when I feel like it I’ll still contact him ,like maybe a text msg, tag him in something in fb or send him snapchats. I definitely think he’s into working out things with me too.. just that, we both still need more time for find ourselves I guess. Maybe our paths will really crossed again when we’re wiser and older, who knows.
One thing I’m sure is, we still have this unbreakable bond. It’s really tiring to fall in love with another person and get to know them all over again. Me and my ex have spend more than 3 years getting to know about each other’s everything. I even got really well with his family. I really don’t want to give everything up. But for now, I’m put back the focus on myself because I feel a little empty, like a part of me is missing. I hope that I’ll get myself altogether again. Thank you everyone of you for replying! :’) <3 Any more advice would be greatly appreciated!
Yes we were definitely making it too easy for them. Not to say all but that’s just the thing about guys, when something is right in front of them and they know it’s something precious , still they don’t want to show it right away that they really need that something until they realise that something won’t stay there forever. I hope you get my meaning haha!
I’m definitely on the same side as you on this. I did try create dating profiles and even went out with one and it just…sucks. I felt sick even with the thought of those guys now lol. Basically they were just there for me to stop thinking of my ex too much haha. But now I’m okay with being by myself. I’m no longer than clingy gf I hope that my ex realises that. I’m sure he definitely happy that we hung out last week but I guess we just spent too much time together all at once..I went for sleepover at his place for 4 days..
Let’s start with our NC again for now! I sent him a snapchat of my new shoes and he’s responding quite positively now I’m going do NC for a week and see how it goes. Well what’s your plan Laur?
Yes you are right I feel that I should go NC again too.. I’m fighting the urge to tag him in videos or photos or send him snapchats.. But if he misses me he’ll find me right? At the mean time I need time apart to find myself too. I mean so many time had passed anyway and I’m already a whole new person but I really don’t want to force anything. I trust that God had it all planned, and His timing is gonna be perfect so I’m not losing hope I’m just keeping some distance now.
I’m so sorry it must have neen so suck that your ex did this to you babe 🙁 My ex and I are about the same ex as you and your ex too I guess. And young men like them just to settle down that early :/ I felt that the best bet is to move back a little and spend more time loving ourselves. If we are meant to me we really, world find a way back. It’s just that we’ll end up with the one who deserve us, whether if it’s them or not. Although we still hope it’s gonna be them pf course..
Hey Laur! I’m kinda going through the same thing as you now. 🙁 I’ll be so happy if you do read my post and give me some thoughts :’)
My ex asked me out for dinner and we ended up at his place and we talked about a lot of things, and had a lot of catchups . It was so nice our connection was still strong and I could sense that he missed me . We cuddled a little and kissed. But we ended up spending too many days together now he’s ghosting me again.. First he made me feel like we can try to work things out again, maybe starting out as best friends. I knew that I should play distance a little but I can’t help it we ended up getting too close too fast now I’m not sure what to do again.. I guess I’ll make the some approach as you and start NC again and working on myself again.I felt that guys just hate commitment that much don’t they? :/ And they only realise and start to know they should appreciate something when it’s gone. So I really feel that playing a little distance now is the best bet for ourselves and the relationship.
I’ll be here if you need someone to talk to! Let’s stay strong together <3Everything was going well at first , he asked me out and talked about a lot of things and get to know each other, but I guess we ended up spending TOO much time together.. we are not even texting each other now 🙁 But I do think we needed some space again to figure things out and maybe catch up again after a few days or weeks. :/ Any suggestion on what’s the right approach?
