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Well from an outsider’s perspective, I doubt it is over. Come back a better person. You obviously mean a lot to him.
Woah, it sounds like you guys have been through a lot. I think you will be fine. Just give it some more N/C and allow things to simmer down.
Yes, it doesn’t help. I forced her to block me twice. So, what were the reasons behind your breakup? Obviously he did not want to see your facebook unless you moved on.
Yes, I have thought about drafting mine too. But still need time. I do not want it to be too intense, but rather from the heart and positive. I just feel so hopeless. I sent so many messages with no response. She also blocked my calls. She is in complete lockdown.
Thanks! I feel it is better to give this time until sending. How long do you plan on leaving it. And will you also send a magic letter?
No, not yet. What needs to go into the magic letter? I intend to send one to her work address in 4 months, just to apologise and ask to be friends.
My fear is that she will forget about the good times with me and go forward with the new guy, who she saw before she found out about me cheating. The parents made her though. It’s such a ridiculous situation. A happily married couple urging their daughter to dump me and consider others behind my back.
Thanks. It is just hard to let go when it was the parents decision and she is telling me she loves me but cannot go against her parents. And her final message was so angry and blunt.
I think mine is a lost cause now. I found her last message to me from October, which I posted on my previous post. She was so angry.
You are at exactly the same stage as me. Although, I may have to give it 6 months. It is very agonising, especially when it feels uncertain. But it is good to take a step back and remember human psychology.
I think you are in a good position, as he still cares for you and loves you. You just need to give him space to miss you. You have to go from being the hunter to becoming the hunted. We don’t value those things which comes easily. So if you go away and keep up no contact, even if he contacts you, then you will build up that excitement in once had for you.
I am still in a refective state. I looked back at some emails today that I had with a friend. And I remember a week before she ended things, I suggested a trial separation and she started crying, got worried and complained of chest pains – that’s how worried she was. I don’t understand, because obviously, she had already seen the other guy at this point, and her parents were putting pressure on her to end it with me and consider others. It just doesn’t make sense.
Tomorrow will mark a week of no contact. At the moment, I still feel so confused, given time to reflect. How could someone who was so into me do this to me? I just don’t understand. She could not handle one day of me not speaking to her before, now it is like I don’t exist and has replaced me with someone who has her parent’s blessing. I just hate how outsiders ruined it. Her parents had no idea of our relationship and how happy we were. They are a huge problem and control almost every aspect of her life. She told me that she cannot go against them. I have so much to fix, but I love her so much.
Thanks! I mean, I think I was lucky to escape a restraining order, I was that horrible and harassed her by text 🙁
The guy was someone who had been contacting her for a while, but she never pursued it, because she was with me. Her parents ordered her to reconsider her choice in me and consider other people. She said she did like him, and that he seemed funny. I asked her if she loved him more than me, she said she hardly knew him and did love me. She hyperventilated when she described how her parents made her see him.
I think she does like him, and obviously they are still together. The signs are clear. I am just hoping no contact will make her remember the good times. I have written her lots of apologies through text, even long ones. As for a letter, I do not know her address, she always came to my place, because I live in a city and she in a village. I do know her work address though, as I sent her flowers after we broke up, because I felt so guilty of cheating myself. I have done such horrid things, to her and her parents. I have been so crazy. It still gets to me.
Feeling very down today. I have feelings of hopelessness. I keep thinking that she will never speak to me again. I did so many appalling things. Her parents are against me, she has this guy her parents made her see (who she is still with) and I acted so mean and obsessive towards her. My last contact was another sorry message via text last Tuesday. I had sent previous texts before that, which failed to deliver, because she is in her home country on holiday. My fear is that these will be delivered once she returns, making me seem even more obsessive still.
Can anyone offer me some encouragement? Thanks
