[Girly]

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[Girly]

It’s been 3 weeks today with no contact.. I want to share my story and get your opinion.

So…in a nutshell..Steven pursued me for 2 months before I agreed to meet him. Once we did, we hit it off..amazing chemistry..waited 2 weeks before becoming intimate but noticed he was a busy guy…always called, always texted BUT..when I called him out on his busyness, he admitted there were 4 other women he was involved with for a pretty long term 1-3 years! He ended up leaving them all for me and saw me exclusively for 2 weeks because he knew he would lose me…then one night he sounded suspicious and told me he was going to bed early..I felt like something was up and drove by his house. Sure enough there was a car in his driveway. I called him and texted him with no answer and then told him I’m coming by..and shortly after texted him and said “I guess you are too busy…wow!!! The next day he called and texted me all day and I did not respond. I finally did and he made up a lie.. I told him I’m not one of his retarded girls. Anyhow we broke up and he told me that I did something that no one has managed to do. I gave him what he had to go to 4 girls to get. I still wanted to be with him if he was willing to change but he said he didn’t think he could be the man I wanted him to be.

Bottom line..he is a very weak man but I know he has it in him. He is scorned from his divorce 5 years ago and is talking about marriage one day then being a player the next. So I gave him what he wanted..I told him that i wasn’t willing to be part of his heirum and if this is what he wants..then ok. I left that night with a heavy heart…I know that during the 3 months we were together that I had fallen…I could be wrong but I think he did too. I did not contact him after that. A week later I decided to block and unfriend him from social media. He was devestated. He tried calling me and texted me really mad and I responded back after a few days very cold and he had few words for me too..that was 3 weeks ago. Last week I decided to take off the block because I felt it was harsh but didnt friend him or contact him.
Today was fathers day and I held strong and didnt contact. This week is my bday and I hope I will hear from him.
He also contacted a mutual girlfriend of mine last week to say hi but she said he didn’t mention me.
My question is do you think a weak man can change for love and do you think he will contact me? He knows my position and I’m holding strong!

[Girly]

A.z, how bad did I do? I wrote what you told me then it went like this..
Him: correct
Me: I just didn’t want to be lied to.
Him: listen I’m not doing this?
Me: doing what? I’m telling you how I felt not accusing
Him: got it
Me: then why are you upset?
Him: I’m not
Him: I don’t know what you are getting at with this “I have been thinking and i don’t care what you did/didn’t do when we weren’t together.We are both single now and we are both free to do anything we want.” whatever you do is your business
Me: All I meant was that it doesn’t matter I’m not making a big deal of it. We weren’t together. Sorry to have bothered you.
Him: and that’s not accusing?
Me: all I’m saying is that it didn’t matter either way. I wasn’t accusing
Him: ok
Me: I feel upset that you took it that way
Him: ok
Me: I feel sad that you took it this way.
Him: don’t worry about it.
Me: ok

Now what do I do ??

Richard…from what I know you can send a letter apologizing and agreeing with the break up..and then continue with NC..it should be hand written.
Please start a seperate blog for your situation as the 2 will get mixed up.

[Girly]

I begged a few tines but no more then a day after. We’ve broken up a few times and got back.. It’s a mess now..nc went on several times for about a week at a time

[Girly]

I feel really badly now

[Girly]

He responded “correct” what does that mean..omg I don’t know what to say it do now???

[Girly]

Hi a.z please help me to understand the mindset about saying that..I don’t really want him to go out there….what feelings does this trigger for him??

[Girly]

So should I text him tomorrow and tell him I was thinking about our convo and then say what you said? Or wait fir him to text again..IF he does

[Girly]

So basically we texted back and forth for a bit. We talked about the condom situation and I told him how I felt. He said he was offended that I checked on him and that I need to learn to trust. I told him I felt scared and unsafe and I’m sorry he didn’t understand how I was feeling. I told him I felt hopeless at the time. Then I excused myself from the conversation and said “anyhow I’m stepping out..It felt good hearing from you” and ended the convo. He didn’t respond after that..what do you think?? Did I do well by ending it?

[Girly]

Ok so instead I wrote..I felt bad blocking you…I know how it feels.

Haven’t heard back…

[Girly]

A.z I need your help…he contacted me and said “it’s nice to see you unblocked me from Facebook” I unblocked him yesterday but the only way he would know that is if he looked me up. What should I say? I was thinking” when I saw the condoms in your bag I felt horrible. It felt like my heart sank into my stomach…what do you think?

[Girly]

Is there nothing I can write to him at this point that will be effective or do I continue with NC?

[Girly]

I do believe that everything happens for a reason and what is meant to be will be..in fact I do believe he is my soulmate..it’s just hard to understand, knowing how I love someone how he can just let me go and be afraid to lose me..I was married for 19 years and I walked away from my marriage and never looked back. He’s been flip flipping for the last 2 months..I don’t get it and don’t even know how to respond when he does come back. I can keep on this roller coaster. I need to feel secure..

I’ve read parts of the secret years ago.. I understand the concept of visualizing what you want as though you already have it. I’ve been visualizing him with me in a happy healthy relationship..

[Girly]

1 week of Nc today and I think to myself..how does any man that loves you allow even 1 day let alone 1 week without contact to go by…I guess I don’t get it..

[Girly]

I guess my worries come from the fact that I feel like I had my chance a few weeks ago when we got back and I blew it by taking the condom issue out of proportion. After that fight he told me he used to be on the fence about us and now he jumped right over to the no side…I told him that he was the one that initiated contact not me and he said “sorry about that” so now where can I find hope? A.z thank you for sharing how your situations went btw

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