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@aryyan
Hey,
Dint do that today, no time…Do u think its d right thing to do?
@aryyan
(It seems like he is trying to play pull and push game with u? It started when u said why u want to know right?)
Yes, right. A little before that…yesterday…i spoke to him…i said that i will prefer to clarify things rather than keep myself in question mark state (read confusion…)
So, he said(in a very cool manner)…I am just friends because we are in the same office. I do not wish to keep any relationship with u post that.
So today I am gonna tell him…’we ought to stay just professional. Not even friends.’
I guess…Now the real NC will begin.
Wish me luck…n Let me know if what i have done or am gonna do is right or not.??NC not finished…but as u know….we r in same office…his behaviour shows…he is indifferent. no ignoring…but he used to earlier ask for tea, now that has stopped too!
dunno what to do?@samuel
“note”…??? i dint get that part…
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Hi
@samuel
@aryyan
@JohnLe
I tried the NC. When I observe him nowadays..it seems he is drifting away…
he used to come n talk – that has reduced too!
he used to be uneasy earlier when we were together in one room, now he is completely ok! indifferent.
Please advise soon….
Need ur advise urgently!
Am I loosing him?
What should I do right now…shud I talk to him?
Shud I just let go?
Please advise soon….
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I am shattered, broken to pieces and reduced to ashes with his decision, then his cold behaviour and now his indifferent attitude.
I am shouting inside…i want to get it out….
dunno how to relieve myself of this…I cant shout at him as I love him!
Help…..@samuel
How shud I find a good way to tell him that he must fight to get back?
Today, he is just casual..d way way he wud be with any other colleague…no care, no concern, nothing! he asked me for breakfast, n when I said ‘yes, lets go’ – he did not go; I did not follow-up…was my yesterday’s reply rude? so has he completely moved on!?He asked me whether I decorated the Christmas tree at my place like every year – I replied ” why do u wanna know?’ was this rude? do u think he has completely stopped being friends even from today onwards…
@samuel
sure… i am willing to show him that ‘I have moved on’…but HOW TO?n yes…one doubt – what if he thinks that ‘oh! good – u have moved on so soon. see, i knew – U never Loved me!!’
he did say something of this sort in the ten day NC after break-up day. He said that I did not talk to him as I did not care for the relationship!! I did not bother to contact him, or his family regarding patch-up; he also said that my family also does not care about the relationship!…he said that this is one of the reasons why he does not want to patch-up.
what to do???@samuel
Hey, thank u!
But the question is …how do I make him miss me when we are at work and we see each other almost all day?
next question…how should I make him feel rejected? (won’t he feel that I have moved on a take a sigh of relief!? that’s what he wanted right..)He tries to strike a conversation…trying to behave as friends…asks me to accompany him for a cup of tea in the cafe…but talks about how great his life is post break-up, his parents are searching for a girl for marriage, he feels relieved after the break-up, etc etc…(i loose my cool when he says all this!)
I had Done NC for ten days after break-up..then we discussed the break-up, i suggested a patch-up, he did rethink once (beginning of December) – but with his own old same point of view – and decided a ‘no’ again…
Now – he shows that he is absolutely cool after the break-up…i sneak-peeked at his PC – he was checking out emotional blackmail details…!Later, he tried to talk to me regarding moving-on ()this was week back), said that he knows that I am too hurt and that I need help – He forced me to go to a counselor!..says he cares for me just d way he would care for any other colleague(which is not true, he does not bother so much about others)
Yesterday, I refused to go out for tea with him, i said not now, later.
I am scared of ‘what to say/ talk’ as no matter what I say, he finds a fault and displays hurt and makes a face and walks away.(Also, I read on a website that if I reject him now, he will feel bad and realize that he is going to loose me and come back. Do u think this will work?)
Besides, Is there a chance still (Looking at the situation)? or I should just let go!?
Just dunno what to do!?
I love him too dearly!! n I want him back!@aryyan
we broke up – reasons given by him:
(he feels..)
that i do not love him, that he was not priority for me, he felt that i insulted him in front of his family.
All of this is not the whole truth.
We had disagreements, fights like all couples do. It was regarding managing the wedding – he felt that I should not do it and my parents should. My family can not do it, so I had to do the managing and hence the disagreements and the fights.
I kept a 10 day NC post break-up, he took that in the wrong sense. He felt that I was least bothered and that I did not love him!
Now, we are in the same office, sitting next to each other…and I am scared of talking to him…fearing one more misunderstanding!
I love him and I want him back…Hi, I posted this on the boards, but have not got any advise/ replies. My situation is getting worse day by day – so i need advise as soon as possible.
please help urgently.
The whole story in short…
We were best friends for 12 years…
got in a relationship 2 years back…
got engaged in September…
he broke up in October.
I love him a lot and want him to get back in the relationship.
The current situation:
We both work in the same office. we have to talk to each other. there were times when our conversations drifted to discussing the breakup. now we tend to avoid, still it does happen. he comes to me to talk, ask “how am i doing?’, advises me to move on, and also says – ‘lets just be friends’.
He cannot see me sad.
he cares for me.
and he also is attracted to me and tries to get close to me when no one is around.
I need advice to turn this situation around to get him back to me.
