Reading what goes through your mind is like looking in a mirror man!
It’s hard to act like this is not hurting you as much as people would expect, having the urge to seek contact but stressing all the time about making the correct decision. I think that there is no right or wrong here… I’d say stay with NC, but at the same time I wonder what NC will bring you in the end. Your friend was right, if she doesn’t come after you, you atleast already started to move on. If you reach out however, you might have a chance to make her change her mind! (but, for how long?) But you can also crash and burn… destroying your odds. At this point though, I’d say stay with NC.