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Hey Guys,
Today marks the 30th day since I tried to communicate with my ex (28/f). I’m (30/m) not sure if I should reach out or not. It was a bad break-up: Tons of fighting… stemming from her jealousy, insecurities and trust issues… but through it all, there was love there. She broke up with me, via email, citing her depression… but I think that was a smokescreen. She said she’d always love me and that our ‘riding off into the sunset’ wasn’t in the cards for us at this time.’ I reached out immediately after, trying to reconcile (trying to see her [she wouldn’t see me], next day sending her a belated birthday present [no thank you or response] and two weeks later an email summarizing all the ways I’d be there for her if she was open to talking again [absolutely no response]. Clearly, she wasn’t/isn’t having it. Candidly, because of her personality and low self-esteem, I think she likes the power/control she now has over me. And yes, I know I fucked up royal.
It’s been 30 days. So… do I continue to move on, past this date, or do I reach out to her with a casual ‘across the bow’ text? My gut says don’t reach out until she reaches out to me… but you all know what kind of mindset that puts us in.
Thoughts?
S
P.S. Thanks in advance for all of your wisdom.
Hey Scorpiostar27
congratulations on your 30 days of NC! That’s just awesome!
I feel you have some doubts about whether or not to reach out to your ex at this point. I personally believe that if you are not 100% sure about it yet, perhaps it’s good to wait for a while. The NC does not mean 30 days, it means any number of days/weeks/months/years until you feel mentally ready to meet your ex again.
Is there any chance to “run into her” in the near future or maybe attend a common event? That would be better than texting/email – because the brief encounter would allow you to study her body language. This in turn will help you figure out where you stand before trying anything further.
Agree with laura ;
if you are not sure after 30 days ;don t reach ,text ,calls ect…
No matter what your problem was
The 30 days is to give space for the both of you .however you have to change during this time.
The change is crucial.
People just feel those things you can not act .
Whatever your PB was , if u don t think that you change and you can bring something else to the table .
Take a guess.
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