-
Posts
-
@ChrisLovesChris have you been working on yourself? To try and build up your self confidence? I’m having trouble getting that through my head. I have no problem working on my issues but it scares me knowing that i’m doing it for her. What if she isn’t here when i finally get my shit together? Am I going to feel like it was a waste or rewarding? You know what I mean?
Hello ChrisLovesChris. I want to tell you something, a miracle last night all due to an amazing human being named Merchaunt on here. Although I would liken him to a gift from God.
I think a few people on here know my story. My ex’s parents (but most importantly my own behaviour) made my ex break up from me and consider someone else, who she saw behind my back. I learned she was in tears when the parents berated her for choosing me and that she didn’t even want to see him. It was my fault, I was immature, and afterwards I harassed her for 3 months to the point she would no longer contact. I texted her sometimes 20 times a day with no response. I was so nasty and I regret it so much, but I just wanted her to acknowledge me.
I tried talking to her friends, they did not respond either, I even got one of my best friends to message her on my behalf, again no response. Then yesterday happened. I saw on her Facebook profile that the guy her parents preferred had posted a picture of her having Valentine’s drinks. I could not take it. It upset me so much, I went clubbing was so upset and then afterwards I shared his status so that everyone could see and stated that her parents made her see him to the point of tears. It was so stupid and basically me giving up.
I told Merchaunt. He insisted she still loved me and would talk to me again. It was hard to believe any of this. I had given up. He asked for her Facebook address, and I did so, then went to sleep.
And do you know what? The next thing I hear is my phone ringing, and it’s her. She contacted me! And we spoke on the phone. It was amazing. She said she was angry and asked me to take down the shared post, but stressed that she wanted us to be on good terms again. Afterwards I spoke to Merchaunt, and somehow he had convinced her to speak to me. Once more, he asked if she loved me and she did not answer. I could not believe it, we were even texting. She had also unblocked me from Facebook.
It is amazing and an absolute miracle. I am now planning to better myself in every aspect and respect and honour her and her family. I feel that I can get her back now.
It still feels surreal. And it is all down to this guy who came from no where, known on here as Merchaunt.Listen to him. Please. If I had not listened to him, I would not be in this position. Just please, trust him. He wants nothing in return. He just wants to help, and I owe him so much.
@MrCat22 I worked on the problem that led to our destruction – my temper. I even proved it, he was never able to push me to lose it again…but it didn’t matter. He can’t forgive me. He won’t forgive me. The only other thing I should probably work on is the fact that I wish I was dead without him in my life, but how do I do that?
@Libertine1 thank you for sharing that incredible story…it has helped me more than you can imagine. I am on the complete brink of a panic attack today but you are helping me hold on…I will take your advice…@ChrisLovesChris is your story posted anywhere? I would really love to read it.
@MrCat22 I found it for you. But please if you have any thoughts, come back and post them right here in this thread. I never leave this thread, it is my safe place
@ChrisLovesChris the way you work on not feeling like you are dead without him is by finding something to fill that for you. For me, thats knitting. If I couldn’t knit ever again, I would still be alive, but I would feel nothing. Knitting, along with several other hobbies sprinkled in, give me a reason to get up in the morning and get on with my life. I may be single, I may have lost the love of my life to things that could have been changed easily, I may feel lonely at nights when I have to remember he isn’t there to hold me like he did for our entire life together, but I have other things that I live for now. I consider myself a fiber artist and that is my reason to live.
You need to find a hobby or two or three that make you really happy. It doesn’t have to be anything extreme, but something that you can always go to when you are sad or feel dead inside. I always recommend crafts to anyone because there are thousands of types and you can really explore them and find what feels like it expresses you the best. I also am learning hula hoop dance which is really fun. You could try some type of exercise, or video gaming, reading, cooking, baking, the possibilities are endless! Maybe other people on here have hobbies I haven’t thought of they can share too. It doesn’t completely replace your ex, but having something you are passionate about to go to whenever you need it is extremely important. I have been knitting for so long, it has been with me through every single breakup and I honestly think I would have fallen apart without it this time. Good luck to you!
@knitterz I had hobbies before this…I have abandoned everything because I can’t bring myself to do them. It makes me really sad to see myself like this…but it’s the best I can do at the moment.
@ChrisLovesChris Dont think of bad stuff coz u are living for a reason … also for me being busy is such aweful thing coz its hard time for me … in this week i need to buy a ticket . Clothing. Attend meeting … organize my all stuff and fly … i hate this also i need to full some papers omg i feel i am being really busy … i was playing and having fun now the play time have finished and its the time for me to take care of all the things i have to do from so long … believe me just relax ur self coz being busy and also thinking too much its still gonna hurt u xD so be careful
Do not worry Jean. I spoke to her. She is eating and smiling again. I turned what she thought to be impossible. Possible. This story can and will have a happy ending. Everyone forgets their thoughts truly betray them and they have to hold a sense of honor to survive. Not only to survive but to make things happen.
It’s true guys…this morning was finally a morning full of hope and new beginnings. I still have a long road ahead of me but I have renewed faith. I will still be here in my thread though, for anyone who just wants to come and talk…we will support each other…
@ChrislovesCHRIS This is great soul now i am so proud of u 🙂 i needd some sopport can u make me feel better 🙂
@JeanValins I can honestly say miracles can happen when you least expect them, you never know what is just around the corner. never stop believing in yourself…and like Libertine said listen to Merchaunt!
@ChrisLoveschris i was playing songs from Youtube and suddenly it turn to the song i’ve been listening to when i fully in pain after the breakup… there is something in my heart like its broken and i can feel the pain but its kinda covered because these few weeks NC even its hard the time was back then but i am really glad to be the man that i am today … i feel so proud of my self that i gain so much power in few weeks .. and really thanks to everybody who is helping me
@JeanValins that is great… I want to get to the point where I feel powerful. Right now I am still in so much pain, and I think mostly I am just really traumatized. I wish I could understand why my ex affected me so much…I don’t want him to have this power over me anymore. I hope we can take this journey together and figure this out about ourselves
@ChrisLovesChris its late here and i am still awake … i feel so weak and the pain back to my stomach … its just there something really bother me now and i wanna hear good new ,..
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.