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Posts
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Good luck for this evening Patrick! Or did you meet already?
Either way, what’s new?
Hello Charlie. Any news on your side?
We met yesterday. Spent about 4 hours together. Was really nice. She enjoyed it. I was watching for signs. She touched me and stroked my arm several times. Looked into my eyes. I mentioned where we were going with the football team and she said she wanted to go.
She spoke about not being able to carry on before. But I look so good now. Charismatic she said. And she can see that I have Changed.
He came up a few times but she said something odd. That it’s so hard for our new partners. That if he said he was leaving her she would just say ok Bye.We went to the flat. Or old flat. Hung out there for an hour.
Then she said that she would like to go for dinner with me soon and to the cinema.Big long hug at the end.
Look. Maybe it’s all nothing. But it was a nice evening. I hope she liked it. She said this morning that she did
Wow Patrick, that sounds like a really nice evening.
So odd for our new partners. Clearly still going through the processes, but of course she would be. It hasn’t even been that long for the both of you.
Setting up a second date, that’s progress.
Sounds like you got what you wanted, it also sounds like you had a really nice evening too. You did really good, well done!
No news on my end. Sent her a song I found this evening. Will have to wait and see if she replies to me at any point. Judging by the length of time she’s taking about it though I figure she won’t be casual about it. Seems odd considering how she said she felt on Sunday. Felt like I got through to her, just wondering if things will just go back to as they were. Meh, we’ll have to see!
No anxiety now, just sadness. At least that’s gone, going to keep it at bay. Missing her badly most days. I wonder if she’ll be missing me.
Hello. Today was odShei text last night when I got home just saying that it was a lovely evening. She text this morning saying it was nice and have a nice day. I text again when I finished work asking how she was. Not great she Said. Tired. I suggested meeting for a coffee. She had to go to the dentist. She was scared. I helped her a bit. I text saying to let me know how it goes. And nothing. Nothing back all evening. I just text there saying I hope it went ok and good night. Hopefully see you soon.
Another girl says give her time. She is confused probably. Not knowing now what to do. Just frightens me somewhat. That yesterday she was like that and today like this.
What do you think?Your girl will get back. You should try talking normally and less of the doing old memories.
Just act cool.
I just wouldn’t over think it for now. You did so good my friend. Seriously.
Can I ask, does she have another relationship now, or is it still the same one? Mr party guy or whatever.
You’ve been so patient, continue with your path. Your messages just the other day were so focused on your life so keep it up. I’m following your lead.
Be careful, don’t give too much right away. Remember the ball and the court. She suggested the second meet so go from there. Forget what texts do and don’t say, you can only really tell how someone is feeling in person. I think you had good signs.
And we’ll have to see on my end, my offer to meet again was replied with a very edgy ‘maybe’. So we’ll see.
Confusion is better than no, yes. But it’s much easier to continue with your decision than to make another. So we’ll see.
Thanks Charlie. You really helped.
You’re right about texts too. She hated the phone sometimes. Although she was on What’s app the whole evening and didn’t text me.
But she showed really good signs yesterday. She really did.
She is still with him. He isn’t so much party boy. But knows famous rappers and people like that. They sound like my worst nightmare.
So they are going out about 2&1/2 months. 2 anyway. Although she did hint that she didn’t really see him in February at all. So she would have to do him. Break his heart probably. And for me. It’s a big decision in fairness. And how could she decide after one evening. Her not replying is consistent with kevins email today. hot and cold means they are thinking.
I’m guessing maybe he text or something today and that made her feel odd.I’ll keep on doing my thing. Hopefully she will want to meet soon. I can’t wait.
As for you. Maybe it’s not no. I would read that positively. And what I started doing is just texting friendly stuff. Never negative. Never about us.
Try to get her to meet again. Or go to London. Would she meet you if you went there?
Good mindset.
Forget about the texts. Time will tell.
In my case, she’s always all over whatsapp. It’s saddening. Friends posting on her wall about how she’s always on her phone. She never used to be.
This week she’s starting her new units. Funny, it’s only her and the handsome older doctor doing that unit out of her friendship group. They have to come up with a whole plan to contain a virus spread over 24 hours in a city or something. Will have to see what happens if she meets me next weekend.
Had very mixed messages on Sunday. She said that she thinks she’ll die alone now (while laughing), no one knows her as well as me, cutting ties with soulmate, never met someone as unique as me. But also still had strong negative associations. After our meet I felt better, I hope her feeling better doesn’t push her towards someone else.
Going to stop thinking about it all now anyway.
Wait till your next meeting, you’ll see something different. It will be good.
Is she doing medicine? My ex is studying that. And I know that they put them in groups and so on and they have to talk all the bloody time about whatever. So never mind that.
That confusion from her, saying a good thing then a negative thing is brilliant. Because it means that she really likes you. She hasn’t gotten over you at all. But she puts up defences as a means to protect herself every now and then. That’s when the negative appears.
She wants you but hasn’t fully figured that out yet. You have changed but is it enough she will think.Start being cool. Get in there. Don’t text old songs again. That shows you are stuck in the past.
Don’t mean to change your mindset here or get your hopes up unnecessarily. But that’s my opinion.
So just cheer up. Be a man and go for it. You’ve nothing to lose now anyway. And don’t get sucked into an argument. Because with the crap going through her head they will come. Just play it cool.
She’s doing immunology. I can only wait I suppose. After I asked her about Paris (she said no) she said she was confused, said sorry she hadn’t replied to my casual text but would soon.
I said sounds great, no obligations. She hasn’t replied since.
I sent her a new song. Said I’d found new songs and would like to share them. No reply.
There have been no arguments. The problem is that she just isn’t replying at all.
Paris was a bit soon. I’d say go quiet for a bit. Then come at it from a different angle. Don’t send songs etc.
Text her as if you were texting a friend. Me for example. Just Hello. Anything exciting in the big smoke? Or some crap like that. With maybe; same old crap here but such a thing happened. lol. EmojiGet me drift? You have to be friends before you can be lovers. Won’t work the other way. If you be cool and fresh and new then she won’t have to think much about being in a Relationship. It went ok before only he went strange she will think. Now he’s cool.
That’s what I think anyway Charlie. It’s the approach I am trying. I’ll be the Guinea pig for you. I regret pushing her last weekend. She kind of knows what I want. But it made her find out that I have a girl.
I don’t want the drama girl at all I’ve realised Charlie. I feel bad about that. She’s crazy about me. She spoke to all her friends even her granny. I like her as a friend and my emotions got the better of me I’ve realised. I haven’t thought of her at all today until now. Poor girl has no chance.
Ah well. She knew there was a massive chance of that happening. Her friends said to stay away.We’re damaged goods right now Charlie. Ha.
So what about that approach? Stop trying to get her back as a girl friend and get her to start being a friend. That way she will talk to you. And you can sneak your way back in. But don’t get friend zoned.
Eurgh, I’ll be honest, I’m not in this for the long haul. And I’m not going to be friends so she can run around with whomever she likes either. That’s part of my thinking with this site, you’ve got to be careful not to give people exactly what they need to walk away.
She knows how I feel about her now, and if she doesn’t think I’ve learnt enough from losing her then so be it, but that’s foolish of her. Things would be very different from now on.
I think you’re right. I’ll just go quiet.
Fair enough. Your call. Going quiet will make her come looking.
You have changed a lot since you came on here first. That is a serious turn around in attitude. Well done.
You make me feel bad for waiting and waiting. But I feel close now. Although another bad moment will drive me nuts. But I think or how that she is seriously thinking about things. The way she acted was not that of a friend. I live in hope. Maybe I’m wrong. And if so life goes on. But I said I’d put this effort in. One last push. I’ll get her.
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